Black Dog 11

Sorry you all seem to be suffering in one way or another. Wish I could help.

Anniebach What a terrible way to treat someone with PN Depression - it must have been awful for you. As you say, it's sad that your DH didn't live to see his lovely family. You've been on your own for a very long time and have been so strong x
Doodle How are things with you and your husband today?
SweetpeaSue Sorry you're having all that pain. I really don't blame you for not trusting the medical profession. I'm the same. I hope you get a proper diagnosis and treatment soon.
Nonnie I purposely don't watch the news on tv, it's so awful, and all those things are out of our control. I'd become overwhelmed with sadness if I paid attention to all the things going on in the world.

My GDs went home at teatime, so I've been doing the washing/drying/ironing. I'll leave the cleaning until tomorrow, I feel worn out . DH and I took them to a play centre for 2 hours this morning, then a pub for a carvery (another day I haven't cooked - ) Hope everyone has a restful night x

Annie things must have been so hard for you with two young children. What a time to make you move.
Sweetpeasue no one here thinks your paranoid. Pain is pain.
Sorry you are suffering so much. I hope you get some proper diagnosis soon.
Yes the news on Ukraine is bad. Can’t believe all those poor people having to leave their homes.
Sorry you are feeling sick I hope that wears off soon.
I’m a bit up and down today, a bit anxious. Just me worrying about the “whatiferies”
Annie such a great loss. 46 years and it’s obviously still very much at the forefront of your mind. As you say, he missed out in so much family life. Difficult to come to terms with that.
Not surprised that search brought things back to you. Hope they found the lady.
So glad you had a good time with MT. Have you managed to eat anything much today?
Nonnie another who’s feeling low. Hope things are sort themselves out for you soon.
x

Such a sad day for you Annie. I can't offer you any words or platitudes to help but sending up a prayer to offer comfort.
Hope the poor 95 Yr old missing lady will be found soon, poor soul.
Nonnie Thinking of you.

Feeling v sick after 2nd bottle of omnipaque.
Hope everyone is coping. Xx

Hi all x

Nonnie take care, we are here for you x

I am sad today, my husband died 46 years ago today, I can’t relate to him, my grandson is the same age as my husband was when he died. I am sad that he didn’t see his little daughters grow up, see his grandchildren.

Here in Mid Wales we have many market towns, last Saturday a
lady age 95 went missing, mountain rescue out searching, and
helicopters are flying over the river which links several of the towns, they have been hovering over the stretch through here,
it brings my darling daughter’s death to mind, so many have died in that river.

My Mini Tornado spent yesterday morning with me, bliss, much laughter.

The rolling news is affecting so many, please curtail viewing of it.

How is everyone?

Annie yes, things have fortunately changed. Makes me wonder why some people blame older people for everything when we have brought about these changes.

SweetpeaSue hope it gets sorted soon.

Sorry, too much to deal with at the moment.

Sweetpeasue I taught my children and grandchildren that
broken trust is one of the most damaging things to happen to
anyone, it cannot be healed with a sticking plaster,bandage or
medication.

My love your trust was smashed , i wish I could heal it x but it
can be regained, take hope x

Have had more uterus pain(feels a bit like strong period pain) despite no bleeding for 3 months. Just don't know cause of bowel probs yet. When I looked up bowel endometriosis symptoms seem same as bowel inflammatory disease but consultant wanted me to believe not. I just don't know what to think but I'm pretty sure I don't trust consultant but nothing else I can do. I feel like I'm not believed and others will think I'm paranoid.
The Ukrainian crisis is so shocking. Watching little children and mothers making it to borders without husbands is heartbreaking. Men told to fight. Having to decide country or family! Couldn't blame them if they chose loved ones, but how brave are the others. Sorry I'm not upbeat at moment.
Annie disgraceful how you were treated with your mental illness. Thank goodness much has been done towards addressing that stigma around mental illness since then. What a lot you've been through.
Nonnie Do hope you're well. Thinking of you.

Take care all. X

Doodle yes we were moved to another town, my husband and our 2 year old and 10month old babies whilst I was in the
hospital, all to save me embarrassment, we certainly didn’t ask to be moved or want to move. This was how mental illness was
looked on in the past.

I speak of it for my friends here to know - we have moved on,
i spoke out then and have continued to do so,

Depression must not bring embarrassment or guilt to anyone.

Nonnie sending hugs x

Nonnie I hope you’re ok. The news of Ukrainian is upsetting but I hope there is nothing else causing you to bee feeling unwell. Take care x
Annie whilst I have heard of your postnatal depression before I didn’t realised you’d been moved from your home too.
That’s terrible. It must have been such a shock and the last thing you needed really. As you say, it’s a good thing mental illnesses are being discussed more openly now.
Hope David is not too shaken up. Have a good time with MT
Hope everyone has a good day

Read it all, sorry not up to responding. Love to all

Hi all x

Depression strikes regardless of age, sex or life style. It is freely
spoken of more now thank heaven. It’s such a lonely illness which is why it can be spoken of here, to have understanding .

Think I have spoken of the time I had severe post natal depression, went into a psychiatric hospital for a few weeks, whilst I was there the police chief moved us to another town to
protect me from embarrassment! so I left a place where I had friends when I was admitted and came out to a different house in another town , my home and my husband had to show me
around it, ‘there’s an upstairs and downstairs loo, ‘ etc, it was so
unreal.

My decision not to support neighbours who are having a troubling time with the woman I told you about wasn’t based on effects on me but by the years when my darling daughter
struggled with bipolar.

David is not a happy daffodil, not sure which was worse for him, Wales losing, me singing Myfanwy or my swearing at the tv !

Hope Scaredycat you are having a lovely holiday x

How is everyone?

Annie it’s such a shame. I would have thought shortbread would be a good biscuit to have. Perhaps it’s the butter (dairy) in it that upset you. What about a plain digestive. Or rich tea biscuit. They are quite plain.
I wonder if depression can strike us all at some point. Certain things that come together in such a way they bring you down.
Even those who otherwise seem strong and self secure can be brought low by depression. I’ve seen it happen.
Hello David ?. See you’ve been dusted off and back on the sofa again., must be a match coming up. Have a lovely time with MT. Hope she has news of a job soon.
HVDY your son sounds like a good dad. Hope the girls had fun , I used to love going on the bus.
Hope you all have a good weekend together.
Hope all the gang are ok

How has everyone's day been? Anniebach, how are you?
Son1 took his children out, on the bus, to a play centre, park then pub for lunch, so DH and I cleaned up at home, I did 2 loads of washing and hung it on the line (Oh we live life to the max ) and enjoyed the peace for a bit. Son made some burgers when they got back, and now they're all watching The Avengers (Marvel).

Hi all x

Biblical- shortbread biscuits are ‘forbidden fruit’ !

Guilt and depression? No, no, no, depression is not a choice, is not self inflicted ,actions and non actions are not a choice when
this illness strikes, separate them, ‘the depression did or didn’t do those things not me.

David is off the top of the wardrobe again, Mini Tornado is here this weekend.

How is everyone?

Oh Annie is there no end to the troubles that come to you.
Of course you can’t get involved in disputes like this. You have so much to cope with just getting though the day without getting involved in actions involving the police etc. You don’t even have a car. I hope it get resolved soon so you can have some peace and quiet.
Sorry to hear the biscuit made you sick. Have you managed to eat any of the oat mix pots or something?
HVDY your DGDs obviously have lots of after school events. At that age it’s always a busy time ferrying them from one thing to another. Hope you have a lovely weekend with them.
Ellie Anne the situation in Ukraine is indeed dreadful. Those poor people who just want to live in peace leaving to try and find somewhere safe to go.
Antidepressants can help some people. Mainly those who worry I think. When you have a situation in life that you find difficult to live with I’m not sure they help then. I wish something could be done to improve your situation so that you had more joy out of life.
Sweetpeasue we did have a nice time thank you. Ate too much as usual. Nice to chat about things. We don’t se them so often now that our DGC are older. They lead busy lives but we meet up now and again.
I’m finding it hard to visualise Ellie May as an 80 year old. I suppose in my mind she’s fixed at being so much younger.
What a lovely relationship you have with your aunt. She is lucky to have you visit so often. I bet she enjoys your company.
Have a good weekend all. Hope things are better for you Annie .

Doodle Hope you had a nice time with son and family. Yes, Hillbillies a long time ago. Just looked up Ellie May. Apparently she died at 80something 7 yrs ago but after actress days became a Gospel singer. I was surprised, I don't know why. Actresses only play a role after all.
Nonnie I too can't believe this can be happening in 21st century. I'm horrified at the suffering. Pictures in paper of classrooms of schoolchildren led down into bunker. It's disgusting that a grown man and megalomaniac can instigate this. How can it have happened that Putin has control of so much of the Western world's energy? Its shocking and I'm angry and sad equally. Has the pandemic not been enough? Lost for words.
HVDY Have a nice time with your grandchildren and a good weekend.
Hope you had a nice lunch with DH.
EllieAnne It's great that you had a walk. I feel guilty as I've put off having a walk for a few days now and it's not good. I like to walk on beach but tide is in at midday lately, when we usually like to walk. (That's the most lame excuse ever ?) It's possible to walk on dunes. Hope you're OK.
Anniebach Such a shame that the shortbread made you sick. I imagine you had a fancy for one and then got punished for it. Shortbread has lots of butter in it so could be that. It looks like it will be trial and error. I wonder if the going onto solid food could take a backseat if you're undergoing some medical tests for a few days and feeling lousy.
Re your neighbours, oh dear. Wise not to get caught up in it though. You've enough to contend with. Thinking of you.
I did some shopping for my aunt today. She's in late 80s and quite frail. Love her to bits. She was devastated to lose her sister(my mam) over 20 yrs ago. We are close and see each other every week.
Made some bread too.
Watched too much news.
Have a peaceful night everyone if you can. Take care.

Annie that all sounds awful. How sad that you cannot have peace in your own home. I hope the tests you are having do some good.
I’m still testing negative for Covid so think I’ve avoided it this time.
So upset and worried about the situation in Ukraine.
I have been on and off antidepressants for years and didn’t find them very helpful. They stopped me feeling much at all and when I wanted to come off them the dr said it was up to me. I was never offered any alternative treatment.
I’m glad so many of you are getting out and about .
I’ve been for a walk today.

Anniebach How awful - you being sick and unable to eat anything proper, plus the bother with the neighbours. I don't blame you for not wanting to get involved.
Doodle Yes, the GDs will be here at 8.30 - the youngest goes to gymnastics, so DH and Son1 pick her up at 6.30 (it's about 1/2 hour from us) then collect the 10 year old from their home, take her for her swimming lesson 7-8, then back here. I haven't gone, it's too hot and noisy there for my liking, so I'm going to make up the beds, put all the clean washing away, and generally faff about until they all return.

Hi all x

Will try to avoid an epistle, having medical tests carried out so
have to put up with feeling lousy for a few days.
Things bad in the Cul de sac, as well as the person next door with her affection for the police !, across the road from my bungalow is a mother and daughter, she is an adult with learning difficulties, she has found something to amuse herself,
breaking eggs on cars and scratching cars , threatening residents, now involved are the police, the council, a town councillor, residents want her moved, council say it’s up to her
mental health team, they say it’s up to the council, police say
there is nowhere she can be moved to, so distressing and I refuse to get involved, so I am not flavour of the month.
You are all in my thoughts and prayers, keep walking, x

Ate one shortbread biscuit - was sick ?

How is everyone? I do read all your posts, just so exhausted after yesterday

Sweetpeasue depression is one of the worst illnesses I think. Takes the joy and pleasure out of good things.
Thank you DH slept through the night (I sound like a mum with a young baby ?)
I don’t like hygienist appointments either. They set me on edge.
Crumbs, The Beverly Hillbillies, that was a long time ago. I remember that.
Nonnie I think we are all very sad and worried about the situation in Ukraine. Those poor people running away and not knowing where to go for the best.
There are people I’m sure who only care about themselves but I cannot imagine what it’s like not to be affected by all the cruelty and hardships we see around us.
HVDY that day centre sounds like fun, no wonder you enjoy going. Ooh I so love custard I am very jealous. DH doesn’t like it so I very seldom have any but if we’re out for a meal I try and have some with my pudding…..sticky toffee if I can.
Thank you for you kind thoughts for DH. Poor man has so much wrong with him and takes so many tablets I’m surprised he can function at all.
Have a nice time out today with your DH. Are your DGDs coming over tonight?
Annie hope you are doing ok.
We have our son and family over for lunch today so I’d better start getting things ready. Take care all

Doodle We don't usually make things at the day centre, but we do team quizzes, as well as indoor bowls, Bingo, crosswords, etc. Yes, we had custard . The meals are very good. Your husband is good, being able to name the months of the year backwards. I hope all goes well with him.
Nonnie. It's terrible, isn't it? I try not to watch the news as it's so upsetting. I feel things very deeply, too, although I think it's a good quality to have. Sadly, there are many things which are out of our control.
SweetpeaSue, Anniebach, Joce345, EllieAnne, everyone in the gang - hope your day goes well.

Him Indoors is off work today (holiday) as there's no work at his place. The boss asked the men to do the stock-taking. My husband said he didn't fancy that, so he's off today and Monday. Going for a mooch round the shops soon, with him, them for a pub lunch. x
*

HVDY that all sounds really lovely. So happy for you.

Been crying this morning after seeing a video of a Ukrainian man putting his children on a train to safety while he stays to fight. How can this be happening in 2022? Tried to find a positive in this and remembered that when I was very ill in hospital my consultant told me that if I won the lottery I wouldn't feel a thing. Now I feel everything so deeply but at least I feel. Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to not care about things which don't directly affect yourself.

Hi Everyone
Doodle I don't think I explained myself properly yesterday. I don't see shame in taking antidepressants. I meant I've felt guilty about the way depression leaves us unable to care and behave as we'd have liked. Still do actually but we have to forgive ourselves I know. Hope you and your husband have a restful night.
Nonnie Sorry for concerning you all but it was kind of you to care. I've had a lazy day today so think my get up and go went in same direction as yours did. Had dental hygienist appt. Hate every second of the scraping and tugging.
HVDY Pleased your son has 3 dy job trial next week and hope it goes well for him. That day centre sounds such a great place!
Joce and Ellie Anne Hope you're both OK too. Everytime I go to write Ellie's name I go to print May after Ellie. Anyone remember Ellie May from The Beverly Hillbillies? She was quite glamouress Ellie. And definitely nice.
Anniebach Do hope you're OK. We care about you. On seeing weather forecast for today I was hoping you wouldn't get the white stuff. Sending you love.
Have peaceful night all.

HVDY lovely to spend time with your DGDs. Hope you enjoyed the pub meal. Nice to meet up with your son too.
I bet you had a nice meal at the day centre I remember you saying the food was good, Do you do activities there like making things?
Hello Joce nice to see you’re still around. Hope things are going ok for you.
Thank you Nonnie I think DH was a bit shocked to be treated a bit like a geriatric patient.some of the questions took him back a bit, I don’t think either of us could see the connection with his restless legs but we can’t fault them for being thorough. When they asked him to count backwards from 20 and name all the months of the year backwards, I think they were a bit surprised at the speed he could do that.
He might be a bit doddery in his feet but his grey matter is working ok ?
How are things with you and yours?
Annie life seems to have been a bit busy for you recently. Hope you are ok. We miss you lots when you’re not here posting.
HVDY just read your second post and now I’m even more jealous of your trip to the day centre. I love sticky toffee pudding. Please don’t tell me you had custard with it or I’ll be green with envy.
Will be keeping fingers and toes crossed for your son next week. Hope the trial goes well.
I bet your DGDs will be thrilled being with you over the weekend and Monday. How lovely for you all.
Take care all.