Black Dog 10

Morning all
Shinamae- so far so good - hope you got a bit of comfort from the Doctors appt. hope you are ok today.
Annie - I echo Doodles sentiments and thank you for using your precious iPad time visiting us. Hope your Sunday is a peaceful one- no worm eating!!!
Ellie Anne- I,m so sorry that you feel so low. You show great strength of character to listen to your inner self and carry on with your day. I think going away with your daughter might be just what you need- spoil yourselves and do things you both enjoy. It will be an opportunity to maybe talk over your situation with her. Hope your grandson recovers quickly- children are very resilient.
Joce- hope you and your family are all ok.
Nonnie- I think since lockdown ,when we led much simpler lives , now we are getting more back to normal things we did before without thinking seem to be much more tiring and require more effort. Yep do the things we enjoy ans what needs to be done- the dust will always be there!!!
Oh a theatre visit that was brave. What did you see?
Sorr6 you lost a treasured earring. Why is it always the things we love that get lost or broken? The other da6 I took out a n earring which flew off onto the floor and I promptly stood on it and broke it. It was one I loved as it came from the Navajo reservation.?
Doodle- taking BP readings is my all time most scary thing to do. I absolutely hate it even when I do it! I don’t even like talking about it. I manage it in the end but I shake like mad .
Glad you are having nice long walks - it is lovely though sitting down afterwards with a cuppa isn’t it.
This morning on my walk going past the petrolstation it had a very long queue and the price had gone up I think.
We are hoping to go away in a couple of weeks - not if we can’t fill up the car though?Still what will be will be.
Hope you all manage to enjoy your Sundayxxx

Nonnie I’m so sorry you’ve lost your earring. We all have things with sentimental attachment and in many ways these are more valuable than expensive things. Do you think if you phoned the theatre and told them where you were sitting they might have a look for it for you?
My DH keeps regular readings from his BP monitor. It helps when someone questions his BP which is usually very high at the GP surgery or in hospitals. Do you have an oxymeter too?
We bought one at the start of COVID as it measures the amount of oxygen in your blood (it’s one of those little gadgets they put on your finger when you are in hospital)
I’m sorry you had to leave your therapy session. Why do people view how we think and feel as a competition. No one knows how you feel in your body or mind but you. No one but you knows how anxious, frightened or depressed you are but you. Others should not judge.
Hope you all have a good weekend BDG

Doodle perhaps 'recognise' is a better word? Everyone has limitations, different at different times in our lives. On the days when we are not doing our volunteering I feel very tired, a bit like when I was working and took a holiday. I accept/recognise this and don't beat myself up about it, just do what is necessary and let everything else slip.

Shinamae glad that went well, here's to the next step. Think you must have a good GP, ours seems to be getting behind with things. I haven't had my blood test because of the shortage of containers and they are not starting the vaccinations until next week.

For those with high BP, some years back we bought a monitor because DH also has white coat syndrome. It has been well worth it. When the doc does a check up he takes his BP 4 times a day for a week and I put in an Excel chart. I then calculate the daily and weekly average which gives a clear picture. He now only needs one medication instead of the 3 he was taking. I did the monitoring too and now the GP understands that I really do have low BP.

Ellie Anne keep hanging in there. Sounds like you are finding lots of ways of occupying yourself. Hope your GS is OK.

All very well to be told there is no fuel shortage but there is because people are buying it so they can be sure they get to work or, as in your case, so they can be available in an emergency. DS filled his car earlier than usual as he normally only does short journeys but we have a longer one planned and that will need a full tank.

Doodle you are so right, of course we can find people 'worse off than us' but it is not a competition and it doesn't diminish how we feel as individuals. When I was in a therapy session during my hospital stay another patient seemed to think it was a competition and she was worse off than me. I walked out of the session.

Plans for the last few days have been abandoned but we did manage to go to our small local theatre last night. Apart from the staff we were the only ones wearing masks so it wasn't that comfortable. Unfortunately I lost an earing, a sentimental one. I had stopped wearing earings because of the specs, hearing aids and masks but put some in last night. Telling myself it is only a thing, not a person and things are not important.

Ellie Anne I’m sorry , you are obviously going through a really bad time. Would it be an idea to have a chat with your GP? I know before we’ve talked about why you don’t want to leave your DH but if the situation at home is really so bad is there no where else you could go? I’m sorry your little grandson is poorly. They often pick up quite quickly at that age so hope he’s better soon. Don’t fell bad about coming on here and saying how you feel. There are always people worse off than us but that doesn’t mean that your feelings don’t count or aren’t valid. You don’t have to post on here and pretend things are fine when they’re not. I just wish we could help somehow.
A trip with your daughter might be nice. A chance to get away.
Joce how are you doing? Hope things are all ok on the health front for you and your family.
Sleep well all x

Ellie Anne sorry you are feeling so down, so pleased you give yourself a talking to. Thinking of you stay strong. Sending you hugs x

Hope everyone else are have a good weekend
Night all sleep well ?

I’ve been very low. Was sitting in the car by the sea and thinking how easy it would be to walk into the sea and disappear. I knew a young man who did that a few years ago and saw the heartbreak it caused so I gave myself a talking to and got on with the day. As long as I stay out most of the time I can cope. My daughter will probably phone tomorrow and I hope I can talk to her without breaking down like I did last week. I have to decide if I will go away with her in November and have no peace inside about it. Tonight my son texted to say my grandson 14 mths. Has been unwell and I’m imagining all sorts of things. Also worried about this petrol shortage or panic buying as both sons live an hour away. Sorry I’m rabbiting on here. I know many are much worse off. Thinking of you all especially Annie and hoping you get your iPad blinds and doors sorted soon.

Annie we feel honoured that your share your 17% by visiting us. Hope you get your iPad soon. We miss you.x
Shinamae that is positive news. Well done for going. Hopefully the blood test and colonoscopy will do more to reassure you.
Hi all. Been a warm day here although completely overcast.
Been trying to do a bit of sewing without much success yet.
Went for a long walk and I was quite exhausted when we got back. Don’t know why I get so worn out.
A few minutes rest and I am fine though.
How is everyone else? X

Hi all x

Takes me most of the day to read your posts, iPad only charges to 17% so have to write a sentence then wait.

Stay strong my lovely friends , am being positive,will find someone to get new iPad working .

Hugs x

Thank you all again for your lovely supportive messages. I went to the doctor yesterday and after the physical rectal exam he could not find anything so that is a positive. Next Friday I am going for a blood test and he has also booked me in for another colonoscopy..

Annie I cannot understand why so many things don’t go right for you. I hope your iPad is sorted soon. Can you use it until it is set up properly?
Scaredycat I have never had a sister so don’t know the bond you have with yours. Sorry you don’t get to see each other so much. Cruise is coming up soon. I don’t give the exact dates as you never know who is reading this but I will let you all know when I might be absent for a bit.
Shinamae we have all benefitted from Annie’s support and help. She has been the leading light of this thread for as long as I remember. If you stay with us you will find she has lovely poems and words of wisdom for us all.
Joce glad you are still meeting up with your hypnotherapist. If you feel it helps, it probably does.
It mustn’t be worth your while getting a monitor of your own. It may take the stress out of having your BP done at the surgery.
I would make room in my case for you all if I could. ?
Have a good weekend all x

Hello how’s everyone today...
Annie I would be eating worms has well if I was you, keep plodding you will get there I’m sure x

Scaredycat im not bad today, my hypnotherapist phoned this morning will have a session on Monday he’s a very nice man..
I feel for you it’s so sad when our loved ones go home. Hopefully you will get to spend some more happy time soon.x

Doodle no I don’t have a monitor at home.. enjoy your cruise..
Can you make room for a small one in you case.? ?

Shinamae thinking of you ...good luck

What a lovely supportive thread this is ?

Afternoon all.
Nonnie- yes it’s all about making memories. I hope my great grandchildren will remember the afternoon they spent with us when my sister was here- laughter and love.
Joce- hi hope you are ok today.
Shinamae- will be thinking of you tomorrow and hope all goes ok
Doodle- when is your cruise - lovely countries to visit. Such a shame that you can’t go ashore isn’t it. The best bit for us about being on the boat is getting off it!!!!
Yes my sister and I Face Time every week but the joy of being physically with her and having a hug was so emotional. I didn’t want to let go when we said goodbye.
Glad you enjoyed your visitors - you are right it is tiring but a nice tired.
Annie- one thing after another no wonder you feel in a worm eating mood!!! Still at least you have your new IPad now so hopefully you,ll be up and running soon. Big Hug coming your way XX
Wishing all the gang a lovely afternoon - sun still shine here today???

New iPad arrived, chap who is going to set it up today has to have a Covid test so can’t come.

I am going down the garden to eat worms ?

Hi all x

Still waiting for new iPad

You are in my thoughts and my prayers x

Joce my DH suffers from white coat hypertension and it is quite well known. He always takes his BP at home and then phones the surgery with his results. Do you have a monitor you could use at home and do the same, it might help you not to get so stressed?
We are going to France and Spain on our cruise but I doubt we will get off the ship. Due to COVID we are only allowed off if we go in an escorted trip. DH and I prefer to do our own thing but obviously with COVID that is no longer possible so we will just stay on board.
Scaredycat I’m glad you had a lovely visit from your sister. It’s nice you get on so well. As you say it’s a shame you live far apart. Do you Skype or zoom each other?
Nonnie your post made me go back and check what I had written. I couldn’t remember what I’d said about accepting anything. Now I’ve re read my post I see what you mean. In some ways accept was the wrong word. It’s not so much acceptance as the fact that I have no choice. I was talking about it with my SIL today. Although considerably younger than me, she too is not able to do things like she used too. I certainly have aged more in the last 12 months I think. My breathing is my biggest problem I reach a point (quite quickly) when I have to stop and rest because I physically can’t do any more. I think that’s what I meant about accepting it. My dear mum used to say old age doesn’t come without its trials.
Oh I’m sorry you didn’t get your day out. Hope you can re arrange it soon it sounded a nice place to visit.
Annie I take it your iPad is still playing up. Hope you are ok x
Shinamae good luck for tomorrow. You are doing the right thing by getting things checked out and at least you will know one way or another what is going on. I hope you get on ok. Pop back and let us know how you are doing.

We’ve had visitors today. We are not used to it and I’m exhausted tonight. Nice to see them though and we had a lovely catch up.
Sleep well all x

Seeing the doctor at 4:45 tomorrow which will be a relief as he will give me a physical rectal examination, not something I relish but I realise is totally necessary…..? then depending on his findings take it from there…

Doodle how are you?
Hope everyone’s ok Bluesky, Nonnie ,scaredycat, shinamae,
Every else...
hope you all have a peaceful night.. ?

Hello Annie how’s things for you? X

Hi all x

BlueSky all medications have side effects so please try not to worry about your new ones.

Doodle I think that word 'accept' is great. If only we could all be that sensible. I'm certainly not good at accepting things I should.

Scardycat so happy you enjoyed your sister's visit. I think we all need to make good memories as none of us know if there will be a 'tomorrow' whatever age we are.

Thanks for the good wishes, we had to call our day out off at the last minute which was a great shame. We did manage a little walk though, fed the ducks in the park and chatted with a few people on the way round.

Morning everybody.
Hope everyone is ok today.
Shinamae- so nice to have you here

My lovely sister has just left to go home- I feel so sad.
It was wonderful to have her and BiL with us and spoil her for a few days. She is so brave and uncomplaining . The weather has been kind to us so we were able to go to the sea and out and about. I miss her already . I am so lucky to have her wish she didn’t live so far away.

Joce,Rafichagran,Ellie Anne , Doodle, Nonnie, Annie, BlueSky, and all have a good day and I,ll be back to posting properly tomorrow. Xxxx

Doodle I am calmer today . I don’t seem to cope with anything nowadays. You are braver than me I should take a water sample in but I don’t think I will be doing that anytime soon after the scare with bloods I’m really bad I know but can’t help how I am..
Cruising how lovely where are you going...
Bluesky I thankfully don’t take any tablets yet. My BP goes up every time I go in the Doctors, soon comes down when I’m coming out ? I have i think what’s called white coat syndrome I avoided them at all costs, have to go for my B12 injection every 3 months and that sends me into a attack been today so can forget about it for now...
Annie do hope you get your iPad sorted soon take care x
Nonnie hope you enjoyed your day, and all went well for you
Have a peaceful night sleep all ?

Nonnie hope you had a better day today. Did you enjoy the Heritage site? Nice to meet up with friends. Hope you had a good time.
Annie it’s about time some things went right for you. What a pain about the iPad you rely on it so much. We are here, thinking of you. Hope your new one arrives soon.
Joce hope your stressful day yesterday didn’t continue today and things are more calm. I find I cannot cope now with things I used to take in my stride years ago. I think lockdown had the effect of making me accept a more slow and quiet pace and now I can’t cope with being “full on” anymore.
Bluesky nice to hear from you.
I had exactly the same problem with my asthma meds, been on the same one since I was 25 and then suddenly they weren’t making it anymore,. I was quite worried as the old one had worked so well. However, the new one seems to do the job so fingers crossed will be ok.
My DH has long term high bp too. His current regime seems to be working well though. Hope yours does too.
I would try a short break in the UK if I were you. Somewhere interesting or relaxing as a compromise to your DH. You may well enjoy it.
No actually I haven’t had a blood test recently. You are quite right it could be some sort of deficiency that is affecting me.
We are hopefully going cruising again soon. When we get back I will ask the Gp about it. Thank you.
Take care all and sleep well.x

Morning all x I’ve had problems with my long standing high BP. The miracle tablet the consultant gave me 3 years ago had to be discontinued as was depleting my sodium. So I’ve been worried about stopping it as it did do the job of bringing my BP down, then more worry about the new one and the possible side effects. Hate changing medication as I know you can find yourself worse off. Anyway so far so good. Otherwise not much else to report, everybody seems to get excited and book holidays abroad. DH is a keen as ever, I’m not and at the most I’ll agree to a short break in the UK. I know I’m a grumpy old woman!
Annie sorry you are still at a standstill, how much more can you take?
Doodle about your tiredness, have you had blood tests recently as it could very well be your sugar, iron or thyroid or something else not quite in range. Do you take a multivitamin and mineral supplement as a precaution? I do as I’ve become a very fussy eater.
Nonnie I hope you have a lovely day out, nice to be able to do ‘normal’ things again.
Take care all x