Black Dog Gang 6

I wish I had a magic wand to wave all the pain away. I have a religious calendar and each day it has a different verse. Todays verse said "When we are filled with joy, we can look at a rain cloud and say to ourselves, there's a rainbow coming in just a little while." I wish you all peace.

Thank you Annie you are right of course. The over thinking is due to the anxiety.
I

rafichagran so sorry you are so troubled. I won’t ask questions , you say you ‘have made a mistake’, as someone who has made many , small and big I understand.

With mistakes , if we can put them right with a ‘I’m sorry’, that
helps, if not we shouldn’t beat ourselves up, there are things we say or do which we can’t unsay or undo .
All we can do is learn not to repeat it.

Please stop punishing yourself x

I am very sorry some of you are having such awful days and I thank God for this thread.
To my colleagues, friends, and family I am saying I am not anxious stressed or depressed, but I feel so down. I have made a mistake, not a terrible problem, but I am really beating myself up about it and worrying. The going over it time and time again in my head type of anxiety. When there is no need too.
I seem to be tip toeing round people at the moment so as not to upset any body, my self esteem has really taken a nose dive.
To everyone one of you who is feeling bad I wish you well.

Doodle I think it is the frustration when I feel I should be able to change something really bad but keep coming up against a brick wall. I accept the things I can't change in my past, most were outside my control and some were my own mistakes but the past is gone. I never expected some of the good things in my life but do think that generally they are the result of hard work from all members of the family and my wonderful friends. I don't believe that there was anything I could have done to prevent my various health issues, none related to each other. I have overcome or accepted them all because there is no other option and I think it has made me stronger.

I like to take some credit for the wonderful people my children have become while also recognising that things could have been different if they had been influenced by others outside the home.

What I am trying to say is that I know I have good things, I know my situation is much better than others but I still anticipate the bad stuff that history tells me will keep hitting me. Wish I could explain it better.

Why I hope you are feeling improved this morning, feeling better might be too much to ask.

I hope some of you find sharing your stories on hear helpful, I can't but I do rant away in emails to friends and find that writing it down helps me. I type quite fast so some people do have to read quite long emails!

Think I'll go and made a comfort fruit cake

Hi all x

How is everyone today ?

On dark and light , I remembered this -

‘Two men looked out of prison bars,
One saw mud, the other saw stars ‘

I think we all experience the dark and the light but we do have to remember ‘the sun always rises’ x

Thank you eilyann

I have dark times, perhaps I come across as a character from
Monty Python - ‘ always look on the bright side of life’.

Have and do experience the dark and the bright.

Annie you are always (or appear?) so strong .You lift us up as the song goes but I'm sure it is difficult for you. You are always in my prayers. x

why take care. We are all here for you.x
lavender how are you? x

Hello everyone. Up and down days for us all.
Wishing you a peaceful evening and a good nights sleep free of worry and pain. Take care, stay safe, love to all xx

Hi all. I'm having a bad day today, catch up tomorrow. Stay safe and sane. Lots of love to you all xxx

nonnie so sorry you are having such a bad time. No need to tell us what it is all about we just care that you are hurting.
I don’t think annie shared with us to make herself feel better but to let us know that she too has had more than her fair share of troubles and therefore, knows what others are going through.
I think good and bad things happen to all of us nonnie. We all have our periods of rain where we are brought low and our moments in the sun when things get better. It is life. We often never know others problems. Many who seem to sail through life without a care in the world have worries and troubles you wouldn’t dream of. I am sorry that you have had such a sad and awful past and that life is very difficult for you at the moment but we have to hope that things will get better. I hope you have a lifting of your spirits soon x

nonnie look at your positives, you have a husband who loves
you, you have good people in your life and know they will be
there for you.

Just because bad has happened it doesn’t mean good won’t continue . Sorry you are having a bad day x

Annie I am so glad you are able to share all that, I hope it helps.

Thank you all for you kind words.

There are reasons I can't share my troubles with you all, you will just have to take my word for it that I had a horrible childhood then married a lovely man. That didn't take away the troubles, I have had far more than my fair share, far far more. I started to write some of them down but then thought better of it. I am not saying it is worse for me than some of you, but it is quite awful.

Those who know me know what life has dealt me. Yes, I have lots of good things and good people in my life and I value them and know they will continue. However, I can't stop catastrophising as I was taught that history it the best indicator of the future. Just because good happens it doesn't mean the bad won't continue.

I wish I had words of comfort to you all but it doesn't always get better for all of us. I am grateful that I am less affected by covid 19 than many others, that I have everything I NEED, that there is love in my life. Sorry to sound so negative but I think this thread is for us to pour out our feelings and I feel rubbish today - again.

We have rice cakes too annie for lunch with a bit of cheese and apple. Is your meal replacement pleasant or is it difficult to force down?
I’m ok in myself thanks, just the usual worries. thanks for asking. Lockdown not helping DGS. I just keep praying for him to be happier and to make his mum and dad happier.
The lockdown is having such a bad impact on so many. I know we need it but hope it’s lifted soon.
Hope everyone else is ok.

Hi all x

How are you coping ?

Doodle ok thanks. , I do have rice cakes and honey for breakfast but then only the meal replacement for the rest of
the day.

How are you and how is your grandson? x

Well at least you won’t go hungry annie. Is that all you have or do you tip it up with other food? How are you today annie hope you are ok.

lavender love ‘look for the light in the distance’ x

whywhy no one is alone here x

Joyce 150 bags , go girl , come back soon x

140 bottles of liquid meal replacement was delivered today,
more bottle washing !

Evening, hope you are all well.. I’ve not been around our internet went down, still not up and running right..
I have all the same been busy with my scrub bags, 150 and counting. Will hopefully catch up with you all when we are back up and running...

Annie hope you are ok..

Stay safe and well all
??????????

Lavenderzen I like that Look for that light in the distance, we will get there together Thank you

Thank you. It is so warming to be around you all because you understand just how I feel. Today I keep thinking of the song. You'll never walk alone. Beautiful words. X

Dearest Annie you have been through so much xx your wisdom and kind words mean everything to us all, we would be floundering and lost without you xx

Hope everyone is coping the best they can. Good to see you Flutterby, it is difficult times for us all, we have to find something to lift our spirits in whatever way we can. For me it is the wonder of nature.

Sending love to all Doodle, Nonnie, Why, Rafichagran - how are you, you have got through the Sunday night feeling and its now Monday, keep on keeping on, Yoga I am so sorry to hear about your physical problems, Bluesky and all others who I have forgotten.
Stay safe, look for that light in the distance, we will get there together xx

whywhy I posted about me because I wanted to explain I
really do understand dark tunnels even if we have to cope with
different causes.

Love and hugs to you x