I am very cross - a corona virus story.

No, dear lady, she will not return to you, because you will refuse to open your door to her and no-one on God's earth can force you to take her in.

Good idea, get your DD, who sounds like a strong person, to contact this cousin and tell her not to come. Go home woman!! If people wo 't be allowed into America soon, she could be with you for a year.
What do you mean, schnackie about retiring to the living room? Surely you are not letting her stay if you only have one bedroom and are letting her use it?

Put an official looking notice on the door when she is expected back, saying the occupier has been put under strict isolation orders! Do not have this woman back over your doorstep. She ignored everyone’s advice especially yours. She disobeyed the law & Gatwick were wrong to let her fly.
Do not feel guilty at all, you put her up and therefore kept your promise. Phone Gatwick and tell them you cannot have her back because of self isolation.

If you are can't deal with this problem, ask your DD to contact your cousin and explain that you are self isolating, as per government rules, and therefore unable to help out with accommodation (if you are over 70 you're covered for months). Don't leave it until it's too late and cousin has returned.

I’m not talking about taking up the GP’s time Suzie, just ask the question over the phone. The receptionist would probably deal with it.

As she will need to self isolate for 14 days returning to UK I would let her find some where to stay. She was wrong to do what she did, it's now upto her and not you to put yourself at risk.

Sorry endless completely wrong to take up GPs time- unlikely she’d get through the receptionist anyway ( and quite right too) GP practices are incredibly busy at the moment - the OP knows what she should do

I know she’s not of course - should proof read

I know she’s the ops daughter and so do all the other posters who’ve mentioned the dd. The dd is cross with the op about wanting to host the cousin. So the dd must be upset about it all for the obvious reasons. So When why don’t you try reading posts properly yourself instead of jumping in on me alone and being so bloody patronising?

@Hithere....I agree.

Why don’t you get in touch with your GP, and ask what they would advise. I think you know what the answer would be. This reminds me of the scenario in “ The Sound of Music “, when the youngest child asks Maria if this would be a good time to sing about our favourite things, whilst hiding from the Germans. Maria says NO, this is the complete wrong time, or words to that effect. It’s the same here, there’s so many times you could offer this service to your cousin, BUT NOT THIS TIME. Gagalo’s idea may work, but it’s a risk, because she’s still got to leave her isolation place, and get to you. Look after yourself, this is serious. She’s an adult and not your responsibility. Keep safe.

Can't she (or you for her) rent a caravan/flatlet for a couple of weeks (at the VERY least) - she needs to be in quarantine.

The simple answer is to tell her that you are self isolating. She cannot argue with this.

suziewoozie this woman is not the OP's daughter, but a cousin whom she hardly knows. You could read the post again, perhaps.

Can you explain phoenix please- that would be helpful

She is a cousin whom you don't know. Be kind but tell her she can't stay with you for your own safety and she'll have to stay elsewhere. She should contact the US Embassy in London for their help. As a US citizen she will be allowed to re-enter the US (if there are flights).
You are risking you and your family by accommodating a cousin whom you don't really know. What's the worst that can happen? She never talks to you again - you've managed this long without her in your life, so it will be no great loss. Not trying to be unkind just practical and you need to think of YOU and YOURS.

suzie your post yesterday at 23.00, I think you may have got the wrong end of the stick.

I'm sorry but this was her choice. Stop worrying.

No!

She hardly knows this person, being isolated in a flat with her for possibly months sounds like a recipe for disaster.
An Agatha Christie moment!

You sound like me -. I cannot cope with saying 'NO' and invariably find myself doing things I don't want to.
This time you must be firm.
If its easier for you - LIE!
Say you have been quarantined by the NHS (you had no choice in the matter and you'd be breaking the law if you allow her into your home) You have a cough and a temperature and are infectious (the NHS is a revered institution in the States and must be obeyed). Say you will be FINED if you break the rules and CANNOT offer her hospitality much as you want to.
Say the UK rules are very strict on this matter (which they are) and you will be breaking the law if you allow her over the doorstep.
Direct her to the embassy and tell LIES!

And more LIES.

Unless, as someone else has said, you can find your Big Girl knickers and say NO.

You could be generous and tell her that she can come AFTER she has isolated for 2 weeks in a hotel. It sounds as if you have a one bedroom flat though. It's going to be hell!

Why did they arrest her?

I don't know what you decided schnackie but she should have stayed at the airport and got the next flight back to the States.

You cannot put yourself and your DD at risk, how can she expect you to?

Please don't.

schnackie - this is a dreadful worry for you. There are two things for you to really consider: 1) you are 67 - do you have any underlying health conditions? If so, you should be self-isolating. That means you cannot have foisted upon you a lodger who has been on flights to and from another country, and in jail in that country. She might bring the coronavirus into your home and kill you. 2) even if she is completely healthy, and you are also healthy, your mental health will suffer as a result of her presence. And this will affect your immunity.
I know it is difficult to do but you need to step up to the plate and make it very clear that she must not return to you. She must contact the American Embassy. Your door must remain shut and you must think about yourself and daughter. Please be sensible - we are in a pandemic situation here.

Not on the same scale, but we had to let a friend down at the beginning of this week.We had promised to go to a hospital appointment with him and drive him there. I felt bad saying we could no longer do it because I think we generally want to be kind to people and don’t like reneging on promises. But we had to put ourselves first. In the event, he used taxis rather than cancel the appointment. As I said upthread coping with feeling guilty for doing the right thing is part of being a responsible adult. I sometimes think that people who are not prepared to be grown up and make tough decisions probably believe thatit’s easy for the rest of us. It isn’t.

You say she is irresponsible. Well, won't you be guilty of the same if you let her into your home to possibly infect you and your dd.