Feeling sad

It is hard isn't it .... one of my DDs and her OH and baby lived with us for quite a length of time as they had a house fire and sorting it all out took ages. When they returned home it was a wrench, both in terms of missing the young couple as well as the baby.

They are a similar distance away to yours OP.

This was some time ago (the baby is now 17!) - at least now you have whatsapp and can send your DGC lots of messages and videos etc.

The only way forward is to remember and treasure this lovely time you have had with them and to know that your input at such a critical time in this child's life will have a long term positive impact. And I am sure you will be called into action as babysitter a lot!

DotingNanny you will be fine but it will take a while to adjust as a new way of life begins. Empty nesters often find life empty when the fledglings have flown but it’s all part of life. In one way you are happy for the parents and gc to get their own home together but in another you are dreading them going especially gc. That is quite understandable. We have to stand back and it is not easy. At least they will be close and not half way round the world as some gnetters experience. So don’t be too sad.

DotingNanny I'm sure you will be needed a lot in the future especially if the parents work. It is a big upheaval for you but you will get used to it.
I looked after two of my grandchildren for 11 years and then they grew into teenagers and didn't need me any more.
I felt lost for a while but found other things to do and I have a lovely relationship with both now they are adults.

Thank you for the kind words , I'm proud of them for getting their first home and the house looks nice from the photos I've seen.
I know it's the natural way of things and I know I'll still see her and be in her life.
I do get on well with mum, we haven't always seen eye to eye as we have been brought up differently but we've always talked it out and resolved things .
I'd never want to take anything away from her parents, I'm not that sort of person. I'm quite an emotional loving person, quite sensitive and it's my downfall at times

Of course you haven’t been swamping and completely strangling this little family. Nothing in your posts suggests that. As you say, you’re just venting a bit and that’s understandable. It's quite natural to get very attached to a grandchild who’s been living with you for so long. We’ve had ours here occasionally when their parents have been between houses etc - just for a few weeks, but I’ve really felt it when they moved out each time. After a period of their being there 24/7 it’s only natural to have to adjust to them not being around.

But onward and upward! Keep smiling for the next couple of weeks, then you can indulge in a bit of a wallow when they’re gone. I’m sure you’ll get over this soon, because you are so lucky that they’re only a short way and you’ll still see plenty of them.

Ah, DotingNanny this is very hard for you, you have given them stability and a good start and that in itself is a very precious thing. This coming fortnight will be tough but I'd quiety take myself off somewhere if I felt weepy, not to upset everyone.
This is the natural course of life that you would want for the little family, but don't feel that you are in any way wrong to feel as you do
Wishing you all the best of luck with this new chapter x

It's hard isn't it. I sometimes feel like I'm "over invested" but the joy that little baby brings! (my grandson is 3 months old).
I think you are self aware, and I'm sure everything will be fine if you keep communicating.
Good luck!

I really haven't taken over, my son and partner are young, and have actively involved me and requested my help with baby and our bond has just developed. I have taken mind not to overstep and I know mum and dad would say I've been a great help.
I'm not stupid I won't be on their doorstep every 5 minutes. I know I need to live my own life too .
I don't feel I am swamping or strangling them , I haven't encouraged the clingy behaviour she has just developed it . We've just developed a good relationship from living together and helping to raise her but i would never take over from her parents

Hopefully you will have a better relationship with your son's partner when she is not living under your roof. That's the relationship to work on, your grandchild will be fine and no doubt they will welcome your help when they have some space from you.

First of all welcome DotingNanny
You have said it all I think I have become a bit too attached
Unfortunately you have it isn’t your baby and I would think the mother of the child will be relieved to move a little way away
Imagine if it was you and your mother in law completely took over your daughter even to the point of admitting she’s very attached to me often favouring me over her parents
This really isn’t good grandparenting you need to spread your wings and find some friends, some hobbies, some other entertainment.
I can understand how distraught you feel, it should never have come to this, your son and daughter-in-law are wise to move away and for goodness sake don’t land in their doorstep everyday you are swamping and completely strangling this little family

Hello and welcome. DotingNanny.🙂

Ofcourse you will miss eachother but it's time for the next stage for the new family.
I'm sure you'll still see her plenty and probably be asked to babysit often.

However when you say she chooses you over her parents that suggests a bit too much dependence .
You and baby need other things in your lives. She's not your baby is she. You're her nanny not her mum.