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Grandparenting

Cost of parties for four year old.

(65 Posts)
Moonwatcher1904 Tue 06-Aug-24 12:38:04

This was posted on one of our local groups. WTF would a 1 year old know about what was going on or what day it was.

"Anyone know anyone with horse and carriage for little girls 1st birthday only needed for maybe half hour to take the little girl and mum to the venue not even a half hour travel !!"

Unbelievable.

Calendargirl Tue 06-Aug-24 12:28:34

Although I do understand why parents are reluctant to let their children out of their sight these days

But why? What about when they’re at school? Surely socialising at birthday parties and similar is all part of letting them ‘grow up’?

No wonder so many children have difficulties as they get older.

The parents have to learn to let go.

If you aren’t happy about who is running the party or what is involved, then they had better not let them attend the party.

Shelflife Tue 06-Aug-24 11:00:21

Children's birthday parties are ridiculous. They invite the whole class, pay for entertainers and fast food! As for drinking wine - don't get me started!!
You are quite right in not donating £100 , buy a gift you can comfortably afford and don't feel bad about it.
Last year my daughter said she wanted a traditional party for her 5 year old. They don't have much space so I suggested the party could be at our house. She brought everything, games prepared , balloons and food. I asked about parents because I know they all stay at parties that days! She wrote on the invitation ' parents welcome to stay if you are not comfortable leaving them' We had one little boy with special needs and his father wanted to stay , he sat in the kitchen drinking tea. He was the only parent who stayed . Although I do understand why parents are reluctant to let their children out of their sight these days
The party was a HUGE success, the children all participated and it was great fun . My DD did ask about any food allergies, but that was not an issue for any of the children. It was a lovely afternoon in every sense of the word. When parents arrived they had time to chat to each other in the garden. Happy children, happy parents!

Jaxjacky Tue 06-Aug-24 09:18:09

My first thought Calendargirl, 30 odd excited children with nowhere to go 🙄
Our grandchildren had small parties at home with a few children, this inviting the whole class seems to be relatively recent too.
Now they’re older it’s 2/3 friends bowling or similar and something like hot dogs.

Sara1954 Tue 06-Aug-24 08:22:31

We have had all kinds of parties over the years, magicians, bouncy castles, entertainers, treasures hunts, and yes, lots of bonfire/Halloween parties.
But I don’t think we ever spent a fortune, all summer birthdays, and we were always lucky with the weather.
I also remember rounders parties on the local playing field, lots of fun, but not expensive.
My grandchildren have mainly had experience birthdays, a group of close friends taken somewhere special, and when they were younger, the horrible soft play parties.

rafichagran Tue 06-Aug-24 07:01:56

NotAGran55

The party of MN being discussed is £3K! for the 4 year old.

I think that post from Mumsnet was from a Godmother where it was heavily hinted she might like to contribute as she earned a decent salary.
She was told by the majority not to put her hand in her pocket and the cost was ridiculous and that the friend was a CF. This really is not a typical cost for a party.
My Grandson is not typical, he finds it boring opening Christmas and birthday presents, and he likes doing swimming and paintball ect, and not the whole class either. The mumsnet post is excessive and not typical, just a silly person trying it on.

Calendargirl Tue 06-Aug-24 06:16:58

RosiesMaw2

Sounds great, but what was the plan if it chucked it down with rain?

Obviously didn’t, but so much is weather dependent.

ExDancer Mon 05-Aug-24 21:27:48

Yes it was - I hesitated to criticise the post directly which is why I came on here to get a better idea of what goes on, I knew my gransnet friends would be honest.
Seems I was existing in my own little cloud cuckoo land.
I'm so glad I'm not a young mum in these times.
(No, I'm not a rich Gtgran and don't happen to have a spare £100 to contribute, so no money from me).
I have bought her a gift - it cost £20 - now I wonder, do I dare give it to her?
1st world problems? smile

NotAGran55 Mon 05-Aug-24 21:14:43

The party of MN being discussed is £3K! for the 4 year old.

Grandma70s Mon 05-Aug-24 20:58:48

My grandson, now 15, definitely had Pass The Parcel and Pin the Tail on the Donkey at his early birthday parties,

Esmay Mon 05-Aug-24 20:51:30

My kids had relatively old fashioned birthday parties and used to have Hallowe'en ones too.
But my grandkids have higher expectations .
It wasn't my grandchild ,but a friends who wanted a Build A Bear party and she just couldn't afford it .
There were tears and tantrums .
In the end , her half brother paid some £300 plus for the right party about 15 years ago .

RosiesMaw2 Mon 05-Aug-24 20:46:24

Each to their own.
My GS (5) had an outdoor picnic and treasure/Pokémon hunt in a nearby country park in Walthamstow.. SIL had printed off loads of Pokémon pictures and went round before the party pinning them onto trees etc. Pizzas all round (pieces of) and birthday cake and little carton of juice to drink. They also had a Piñata with sweets in it, . It was his whole school class plus some siblings and his cousin, 30-40 children plus parents. There might have been some prosecco for mums and dads who were free to bring additional eats or drinks if they wanted to. Oh and a birthday cake.
I can’t believe the whole thing even came anywhere near £100. They had a wonderful time.
It was all pleasantly “home made” and unfussy. The children could run around and tire themselves out. Clearing up was a doddle and frankly who has houses big enough to host 30-40 children anyway.
But in reply to OP’s original question, maybe they don’t!

sodapop Mon 05-Aug-24 20:42:37

Think you are way behind the times with your party ideas Exdancer my grandchildren didn't have parties like that and they are in their twenties and thirties now.
Having said that I think parties have become competitive now with parents all trying to do something different. It would be a good idea to go back to the simpler things we did for our children.

Hithere Mon 05-Aug-24 20:34:35

It is up to the parents and the kids how the bdays are celebrated.

You can choose not to contribute

ExDancer Mon 05-Aug-24 19:47:32

I've been reading Mumsnet and realise I must be well out of touch - do parties really cost over £100 for pre school children these days?
Do parents no longer bake cakes and jellies, and do children no longer play blind man's buff and pass the parcel?
Do they all go to McDonalds or theme parks or hire bouncy castles now? And do the mums all stand around in the kitchen drinking wine and champagne?
I've been asked to contribute towards my great grand daughter's birthday "£100 would help" and she's four!