Overnight sleeps

Ps Our GS is 8 and has own bedroom at our house which is great for all of us ?

We love every opportunity to have our GS, it can be tiring but the bond you build and the fun you have outweighs everything else. A lot of gransnetters will be saying lucky you!

I used to have my granddaughter every Saturday night that went on for 6 years then her parents divorced and I don’t get it anymore. Id give my bad teeth to do that again. Also my partner used to moan guess what he’s also no longer around. I have to go to visit my son to see my granddaughter when it’s his weekend to have her and as he lives miles away now. It’s not very often.

Do it.

It is entirely up to those involved, but since you ask, that would be a big NO from me! It sounds as though the parents need to learn to deal with the baby's sleep habits (yes, and I have experience of sleepless babes), and they must take responsibility for such a young baby. It sounds as though the parents are wishing to outsource childcare to both grannies. There will be plenty of time when he is older to have him stay overnight.

My DILs mum is basically living with them so they have a live in nanny.. they will always have the ability to have someone else look after him.

I am very concious of my partner. He loves having my GS here. It is the overnight he is concerned about. Today we spoke about why he felt so strongly about this and basically, he is worried about me..
See, I work full time and manage a business. I do a lot of hours and he was worried I will crash and burn because he thought I felt obligated to take my GS.
I assured him I was fine. None of us want to make this an expected routine. It will always be because I want to and my partner is happy with it to.

Not a bad thing at all. If you're all happy that's all that matters.

i take it the OP is not a single person.
she has a partner.
that is the difference.
she has to think very carefully. or else the relationship with her partner may not survive.
i thought on first reading that it wa a typo, and that the child was 3 years not months.
the parents need to learn how to look after their own child properly.
if they hand him over to you, you may be left holding the baby alone, without a partner.
and then if they move, or change their mind, take the baby back, and you are left bereft.
i guess your partner did not envisage becoming an add-on step GF, with care of a child in his living quarters. he could reasonably have supposed that stage was in the past.
it's tricky all round.

The first time we had my GD overnight she arrived with four foolscap sheets of instructions. I have a lovely photo of her sitting on my knee looking at the instructions as I was telling her that she was not obeying them!
A couple of years later her brother arrived and there was a bit of a difference. The kids were almost thrown in and the parents ran!

Mine all co slept at various times
I don’t see any problem with one night a week if you’re happy and they re happy

This could be the beginning of a very dangerous dynamic - them handong their kid(s) to you when it is convenient for them

Personally I think a 3 month old needs his/her parents, we are talking about a baby.

Oh my gosh, it's just the co-sleeping that scares me, they could so easily lay on top of their baby and suffocate him!!
Otherwise, how lovely to have your GS stay a night a week or fortnight or whenever. It can lead to a closer bond between you and him, and the parents can have a date night or sleep in!
I adore having mine sleep over.

lemsip

LOUISA1523 you say surely it depends on what works within your own family.

well of course it does, that goes without saying!

*The OP asked !*

I was responding to your comment.... '3 month old baby should be with mother and father' ?

LOUISA1523 you say surely it depends on what works within your own family.

well of course it does, that goes without saying!

The OP asked !

Chewbacca

If it suits you, and it suits the child's parents, what does it have to do with anyone else? If you're happy then do it!

Absolutely this! If it works for everyone involved, then who cares what anyone else thinks?

Co-sleeping scares me greatly.. my GS is literally in my sons arms all night.. hence my desperation to help them with the sleeping routine. I never had to with my sons..

Some are anti co-sleeping. I was, until my DGS was born. He was a co-sleeper for about a year and a half. It was the only way he slept properly.

Been in his own bed for 2 years now. Prefers it. Mum snores.

eazybee

This post needs to be read in conjunction with Jaydee Tas's post Where do I draw the line to understand this family situation.
Not a straightforward one, and my sympathies are with her partner.

You are right, it has been tough.
I was interested to read your sympathies are with my partner.. I want to be really clear here.. I don't do anything unless my partner agrees.. If I am asked to have my GS, I always discuss it with him first. Like tonight. It didn't suit my partner so I said no.
If I didn't care about his thoughts and feelings, I wouldn't have posted on here asking for advice..
If I misinterpreted your message, I apologise.

I left both of mine with my parents for the occasional night when they were little and I'd forgotten all about it until my Mum produced some old photos of them at her in laws house whilst I was away somewhere I don't think my older children had much of a routine either, infact i don't think i was very good at any of it!

There are some who advocate very strongly not letting GC stay over until they are practically at secondary school!
My view is you do what works for you !

I’m not a fan of co sleeping y the way but each to their own.

I am so glad I came across this forum... it is so relieving to receive advice. I was starting to think I waa doing something terrible!
I appreciate your advice and feedback

It is nothing to do with those that are not involved.

This post needs to be read in conjunction with Jaydee Tas's post Where do I draw the line to understand this family situation.
Not a straightforward one, and my sympathies are with her partner.

I also had GS overnight so parents had a night off from very early on - they appreciated it, we enjoyed it and still have a very special relationship with him.
Neither GD has been happy with a bottle so couldn't do it with them, though we all enjoy a sleepover now.
If it suits you and the parents then it's a real privilege , so enjoy it.

I would seize the opportunity to be involved and be very thankful you’re so trusted especially with a DIL. We have 2 grandchildren we regularly have overnight (although not from such an early age as they were breast fed) and 2 we will probably never be trusted to look after. We are hardly allowed to see them. Enjoy the experience even though it is exhausting.