Funny things grandchildren come out with

my son when little could mix up words sometimes but the one that we all decided was a good new word was when he said " Oh mummy that was my flavourite dinner" On another occasion we had been talking about guinea pigs and we were having fish and chips. He looked at the vinegar and said please pass the um um guinea pig !"

My five year old granddaughter explained what 'death' meant; You go on a very long adventure. BUT you never come back!

Blondiescot .... just, WOW!

Plunger I obviously have a ridiculously childish sense of humour, because forevermore, pop corn is going to be known to me as cock porn! I nearly choked over that one.

Driving in the car one day my daughter -about 2- kept trying to take her seat belt off. My Mum told her that if she took it off the police would stop us and I would be in trouble and may get taken away . All went silent. Then she said " Don't worry Mum, if the police come and take you away I will drive the car home" !!!
There's me worrying that Mum had overstepped the mark about me getting arrested and my DD's only concern was about getting home.

My football mad 8 year old grandson said to his Mum last week, "Do you know Nanny's been on this planet 64 years and still doesn't know the offside rule!"

I may be lowering the tone here, but this has always both amused me and made me tremendously proud of how advanced my son was!!!

When he was being potty trained, aged 2, I was totally stunned by his poetic turn (!) He's been a wee bit constipated that day, and when he got off the potty there was a little "sheep dropping" at the bottom of a big pool of pee.

He surveyed it, then turned to me and said "Mummy look - a pearl at the bottom of the sea!")

When my daughter was small she had long hair. When I washed it I put it up in a towel, like a turban. One evening she said ‘I don’t mind having my hair washed Mummy, but please don’t put it in a turnip’
My grandson asked for a hedgehog cake for his birthday - I’ve made them dozens of times before, but could I get it to work? After 2 attempts I gave up and made a plain sponge, filled with chocolate icing. He gazed at it in rapture and said ‘Oh Nanna, you’ve made me a beef burger cake’!

My darling 4 yr old Grandson
told me that I was not to worry because when I got old he was going to look after me
I replied Thankyou & let’s agree that until that day comes we will look after one another . Wonder when I’ll be old enough in his eyes to need looking after Im 79 this year !

My 6 year old grandson had a pebble in his pocket and when I asked why he said it was his infinity stone (Harry Potter). He then said, “ you keep it Granny then you won’t die”!

I love it when my grandchildren say they’d like prawn cottontail Pringles instead of cocktail ?

We have my 2 year oldgranddaughter once a week. Dont know what diet my son thinks we give her as when he asks what we gave her for dinner she always says sausage and chips!

My three-yearold granddaughter was being constantly put into the "Thinking Corner" at her school. The reason? She refused to keep her pretty pink gingham school overall on. When her mother asked her why she kept doing this she replied "Because everybody must see that I dress with STYLE!"

When my daughter was two she was walking in front of me. We had almost reached mum's house. I said "do you want to run on ahead"? She replied "who's head"? Another time my mother commented "she's got lovely sturdy legs". My daughter said crossly "I haven't got lovely dirty legs"!

When dgs and dgd1 were about 2 and 3, I often minded them.
One day, they went in my bedroom and came out draped in every single piece of jewelry I owned.

They proudly announced, " We are going to work, like Mummy".

Thegrandmarniter what you said upthread about your DGD's words for things that she can't get her tongue around made me smile. At the moment, my own DGD (3) calls the trampoline a "bouncerine".

They can be a laugh a minute, can't they

Our GD when small, had to sit on the stairs for time out. One day, DH was sat on the stairs to lace his shoes up and GD, 3 years, asked, What have you done Grandad?

When my gd was about 3 she came to me in the kitchen and asked for a cuddle and told me ‘them boys’ are teasing me and asked me to send them to bed with no dinner. Them boys were her dad and uncle both 6ft 5 and in their late 20s

so funny

3 year old GD when asked what we needed from the shops announced we needed cock porn ie popcorn.

My granddaughter was talking very clearly ( and constantly) from an early age. When she was just less than 3 years old, we ate in a pub. She had ordered ham, egg and chips. When it arrived it was thin sliced packet ham. When the waitress came round and asked if everything was okay with our meals, we all said ‘yes thankyou’. But my granddaughter then pipped up ‘well actually the ham isn’t very yummy’. ? 3 year old food critic!
Another one was when her mum went for a check up while expecting their second baby. As the mid-wife felt her mummy’s tummy, my granddaughter said ‘ be careful there’s a baby in there !’ ?

We had a family day out on the Severn Valley Railway when my youngest GS was about 5. He had been looking out at the River Severn but didn’t realise we had crossed over it on the Victoria Bridge. When it appeared on the other side of the train his shout of “there’s the River Eight” was met with confusion until the penny dropped!

We had taken DGS6 to an evening theatre performance as a special treat and we brought him back with us for a sleepover afterwards. On coming home and pulling on to the drive he commented that we'd left the hall light on and asked why that was? I explained that it was as a deterrent to possible intruders. After a moments silence he replied "Ah, I see Granny - so, the burglars will think we've spent the evening in the hall!" He's 23 now and I still giggle about how foolish this leaving the hall light on is but we all do it don't we?
Another one from the same Grandson when he was about 3, My husband upon greeting him one day when he came on a visit said " Goodness DGS I'm sure you've grown since I saw you last week!" He replied " Yes Grandad I know I have!" DH asked how he knew that and he replied " Well, when I look down Grandad, my feet are further away than they used to be!"

My grandson thought his name was "you" - because that's what we said when we looked at photos of him!
His mother (my daughter) was sick in bed once and never having been sick before she came into me and said "mummy, there's a fly in my bed". I sleepily told her that if she went back now it would have flown away. A couple of minutes later she came back and said it was still there so I had to go and inspect - ugh!. The next day, I kept her off school and suggested we should go for a little walk "to blow the cobwebs away" at which point she burst into tears and exclaimed "but I haven't eaten any cobwebs". Was I a terrible mum?? Hope not!

One of gd admired my jewellery and I said “I’ll let you have it one day” ….she replied “When you’re dead grandma?” Erm……?

Thanks for making me laugh with all these gems everyone. I’ve had a really bad night and I have sciatica at the moment and these really cheered me up.

My son who was 3 when his little sister was born asked where his Daddy was. I said he’s in the kitchen tidying away the dishes. Well, where’s the baby’s Daddy then? In the kitchen tidying away the dishes. SAME Daddy he said in a tone of outrage! Yes. He didn’t seem to mind sharing his Mummy but was not too happy about sharing his Daddy.

When my son was very little - maybe around 3 or 4 - he said, 'Mummy, do you remember when I was in your tummy?' I said yes, a bit surprised as we hadn't really had any talk about babies - then he said 'I was very sad then because it was dark, but I could see the food coming into your tummy but I couldn't eat any of it!' I was lost for words...