Limericks with very strict rules (7) 88558

Elections can be most surprising
And often cause an uprising
The “ins” should be “out!”
They need a good clout

Elections can be surprising
And often cause an uprising
The “ins” should be “out!”
They need a good clout
Because this country’s capsizing.

But who’ll replace them I wonder?

But who’ll replace them I wonder?
The next political blunder?

But who’ll replace them I wonder?
The next political blunder?
Frying pans and fire

But who’ll replace them I wonder?
The next political blunder?
Frying pans and fire
Are equally dire

But who’ll replace them I wonder?
The next political blunder?
Frying pans and fire
Are equally dire
Let's hope that we don't just go under.

Bubble gum used to be fun

Bubble gum used to be fun
But advise not to use on a run

Bubble gum used to be fun
But advise not to use on a run
A burst in your face

Bubble gum used to be fun
But advise not to use on a run
A burst in your face
Leaves you in a daze

Bubble gum used to be fun
But advise not to use on a run
A burst in your face
Leaves you in a daze
So stick your gum on a bun.

Then you can eat them both later

Then you can eat them both later
Mind it doesn’t stick to your plate(r)

Then you can eat them both later
Mind it doesn't stick to your plate(r)
Or pull it right out

Then you can eat them both later
Mind it doesn't stick to your plate(r)
Or pull it right out
Filthy habit no doubt

Then you can eat them both later
Mind it doesn’t stick to your plate(r)
Or pull it right out
Filthy habit no doubt
Just don’t hand it to the waiter

Some things should be kept to yourself

Some things should be kept to yourself
Like various books on your shelf...

Some things should be kept to yourself
Like various books on your shelf ...
Best to keep schtum

Some things should be kept to yourself
Like various books on your shelf ...
Best to keep schtum
And don’t upset Mum.

Some things should be kept to yourself
Like various books on your shelf ...
Best to keep schtum
And don’t upset Mum.
Such things could be bad for her health

I met a young woman in town

I met a young woman in town
By a tavern of known ill renown

I met a young woman in town
By a tavern of known ill renown
Though innocent, she

I met a young woman in town
By a tavern of known ill renown
Though innocent, she
Was something to see!

I met a young woman in town
By a tavern of known ill renown
Though innocent, she
Was something to see!
T'was shocking - the length of her gown.

How did she come by her fortune?

How did she come by her fortune?
Maybe by method importune?

How did she come by her fortune?
Maybe by method importune
A lottery win

How did she come by her fortune?
Maybe by method importune
A lottery win
Though hardly by sin