Limericks 13

Old Uncle George was a sailor
Was first mate on an old whaler
But his old sea legs
Were craving more kegs
So now he lives in a trailer

The demon drink does for us all

The demon drink does for us all
Yet at the time we had a ball

The demon drink does for us all
Yet at the time we had a ball
No inhibitions

The demon drink does for us all
Yet at the time we had a ball
No inhibitions
Legless conditions

The demon drink does for us all
Yet at the time we had a ball
No inhibitions
Legless conditions
No mobiles for parents to call

Fashions those days, grandkids will laugh

Fashions those days, grandkids will laugh
Like they did at my phonograph

Fashions those days, grandkids will laugh
Like they did at my phonograph
Flared trousers and jeans

Fashions those days, grandkids will laugh
Like they did at my phonograph
Flared trousers and jeans
And those cheesecloth shirts

Juliet ??

Fashions those days, grandkids will laugh
Like they did at my phonograph
Flared trousers and jeans
Minis, disco queens

Fashions those days, grandkids will laugh
Like they did at my phonograph
Flared trousers and jeans
Minis, disco queens
Punk hardware to make people barf!

Down by the sea at Dungeness

Down by the sea at Dungeness
Was Fred in a state of undress

Down by the sea at Dungeness
Was Fred in a state of undress
I turned back to see

Down by the sea at Dungeness
Was Fred in a state of undress
I turned back to see
Him smirking at me

Down by the sea at Dungeness
Was Fred in a state of undress
I turned back to see
Him smirking at me
I feared some sort of redress

I ran to the burly lifeguard

Oh yes Jan, what happened to me with my cheesecloth shirts...I was too far down memory lane. Oops!

I ran to the burly lifeguard
As I thought that Fred should be barred

Juliet ?
I ran to the burly lifeguard
As I thought that Fred should be barred
It was salacious

I ran to the burly lifeguard
As I thought that Fred should be barred
It was salacious
Downright audacious

I ran to the burly lifeguard
As I thought that Fred should be barred
It was salacious
Downright audacious
He needs to be shown the red card.

Would you fly to Mars if you could?

Would you fly to Mars if you could?
I'm really not sure if I should

Would you fly to Mars if you could?
I'm really not sure if I should
Those little green men

Would you fly to Mars if you could?
I'm really not sure if I should
Those little green men
May be plotting when

Would you fly to Mars if you could?
I'm really not sure if I should
Those little green men
May be plotting when
To take over our world for good

The leaves are beginning to turn

The leaves are beginning to turn
In playful breezes soon they'll churn