Limericks 9

Later on we'll go on a pub crawl
Mine's a pint of lager I'll loudly call

Later on we'll go on a pub crawl
Mine's a pint of lager I'll loudly call
Then a tequila shot

Later on we'll go on a pub crawl
Mine's a pint of lager I'll loudly call
Then a tequila shot
And whatever you've got

Later on we'll go on a pub crawl
Mine's a pint of lager I'll loudly call
Then a tequila shot
And whatever you've got
I'm we're gonna have a ball.

But all pleasure comes at a price

But all pleasure comes at a price
One hangover like that will suffice!

But all pleasure comes at a price
One hangover like that will suffice!
It will be bed and coffee

But all pleasure comes at a price
One hangover like that will suffice!
Vision all blurry

But all pleasure comes at a price
One hangover like that will suffice!
Vision all blurry
Tongue all furry

But all pleasure comes at a price
One hangover like that will suffice!
Vision all blurry
Tongue all furry
G+T please, and 2 lumps of ice

Time to sober up and gain control

Time to sober up and gain control
It's best go easy on the alcohol

Time to sober up and take control
It`s best go easy on the alcohol
It isn`t good to feel all fuzzy

Time to sober up and take control
It`s best go easy on the alcohol
It isn`t good to feel all fuzzy
Your kid doesn’t like it, does he?

Time to sober up and take control
It`s best go easy on the alcohol
It isn`t good to feel all fuzzy
Your kid doesn’t like it, does he?
So I've set myself another goal

I think I might take up knitting

Time to sober up and take control
It`s best go easy on the alcohol
It isn`t good to feel all fuzzy
Your kid doesn`t like it, does he?
So let`s make sobriety our goal

We`ll drink lemonade and orange juice

I think I might take up knitting
Something useful whilst I`m sitting

I think I might take up knitting
Something useful whilst I`m sitting
A bobble hat for winter?

I think I might take up knitting
Something useful whilst I`m sitting
A bobble hat for winter?
The cold to hinder

I think I might take up knitting
Something useful whilst I`m sitting
A bobble hat for winter?
The cold to hinder
While outside the wagons are gritting

A feisty old woman from Tiree

A feisty old woman from Tiree
Decided to climb up a tree

A feisty old woman from Tiree
Decided to climb up a tree
She said, "I'm not tall"

A feisty old woman from Tiree
Decided to climb up a tree
She said, "I'm not tall"
"What if I fall?"

A feisty old woman from Tiree
Decided to climb up a tree
She said, "I'm not tall,"
"What if I fall?"
"I may break a few bones or worse, three".

Or perhaps I could try a parachute jump

perhaps I could try a parachute jump
But again I may meet the earth with a bump

perhaps I could try a parachute jump
But again I may meet the earth with a bump
As long as it’s grass

perhaps I could try a parachute jump
But again I may meet the earth with a bump
As long as it’s grass
And I land on my... bum