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Limericks - 3

(1001 Posts)
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Bathsheba Mon 19-Feb-18 14:46:46

There was an old woman from Hull
In her garden she kept a big bull
He's an Aberdeen Angus and gorgeous
His dangly bits are really enormous
His coat used fifty kilos of wool!

My son has just bought a new puppy

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Panache Thu 19-Apr-18 12:32:03

I've just made a large carrot cake
Which exploded and caused an earthquake
However redeemed by my cat

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FarNorth Thu 19-Apr-18 12:35:07

I've just made a large carrot cake
Which exploded and caused an earthquake
Now my house is just rubble

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FarNorth Thu 19-Apr-18 12:35:24

oops

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FarNorth Thu 19-Apr-18 12:36:50

I've just made a large carrot cake
Which exploded and caused an earthquake
However redeemed by my cat
I'm not worried by that

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Squiffy Thu 19-Apr-18 13:37:35

I've just made a large carrot cake
Which exploded and caused an earthquake
However redeemed by my cat
I'm not worried by that
I'll just go for a long coffee break.

The oven is covered in cake mix

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FarNorth Thu 19-Apr-18 13:42:22

The oven is covered in cake mix
I'll show you as soon as I take pics

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Panache Thu 19-Apr-18 13:54:20

The oven is covered in cake mix
I'll show you as soon as I take pics
meanwhile I need to taste

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henetha Thu 19-Apr-18 14:24:43

The oven is covered in cake mix
I'll show you as soon as I take pics
meanwhile I need to taste
With an indecent haste

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Panache Thu 19-Apr-18 15:14:12

The oven is covered in cake mix
I'll show you as soon as I take pics
meanwhile I need to taste
With an indecent haste
My guests are arriving around six!

A home made cake makes me drool

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Sallyann1 Thu 19-Apr-18 16:13:40

A home made cake makes me drool
I don’t even wait til its cool

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Squiffy Thu 19-Apr-18 16:49:50

A home made cake makes me drool
I don’t even wait til its cool
It's no good, I'm tempted

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FarNorth Thu 19-Apr-18 17:20:15

A home made cake makes me drool
I don’t even wait til its cool
It's no good, I'm tempted
The tin is now emptied

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Squiffy Thu 19-Apr-18 18:14:46

A home made cake makes me drool
I don’t even wait til its cool
It's no good, I'm tempted
The tin is now emptied
I've broken my own golden rule.

It means that I'll have to cut down

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travelsafar Thu 19-Apr-18 18:25:20

It means that I'll have to cut down
Now that is going to cause me to frown

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FarNorth Thu 19-Apr-18 18:28:05

It means that I'll have to cut down
Now that is going to cause me to frown
I'll eat only lettuce

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Barberdice Thu 19-Apr-18 18:41:55

It means that I'll have to cut down
Now that is going to cause me to frown
I'll eat only lettuce
Its become quite a fetish

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Jangran99 Thu 19-Apr-18 23:13:39

It means that I'll have to cut down
Now that is going to cause me to frown
I'll eat only lettuce
Its become quite a fetish
But I'll fit into my new gown

So I'll just keep on with my diet

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travelsafar Fri 20-Apr-18 07:20:50

So I'll just keep on with my diet
My friend says she's gonna try it

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Jangran99 Fri 20-Apr-18 07:37:01

So I'll just keep on with my diet
My friend says she's gonna try it
And if we're successful

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Panache Fri 20-Apr-18 08:50:30

So I'll just keep on with my diet
My friend says she's gonna try it
And if we're successful
you could open a school

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Bellanonna Fri 20-Apr-18 08:57:29

So I'll just keep on with my diet
My friend says she's gonna try it
And if we're successful
And begin to feel zestful

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Panache Fri 20-Apr-18 09:57:36

So I'll just keep on with my diet
My friend says she's gonna try it
And if we're successful
And begin to feel zestful
I urge do not keep the contents quiet.

When all slim,lithe and full of vigour

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Squiffy Fri 20-Apr-18 11:42:19

When all slim,lithe and full of vigour
Having regained our sylph like figure

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Panache Fri 20-Apr-18 12:59:17

When all slim,lithe and full of vigour
Having regained our sylph like figure
A new wardrobe is next on the list

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travelsafar Fri 20-Apr-18 16:45:03

When all slim,lithe and full of vigour
Having regained our sylph like figure
A new wardrobe is next on the list
Then i will raise a joyful fist

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