Limericks - 2

A shy young girl from Australia
Took part in a wild bacchanalia
She just could not stop blushing
When some grapes she was crushing
Surrounded by wild genitalia!

A naughty young schoolgirl from Devon

A naughty young schoolgirl from Devon
Spent a weekend that felt just like heaven

A naughty young schoolgirl from Devon
Spent a weekend that felt just like heaven
She was camped near boy scouts

FarNorth -

A naughty young schoolgirl from Devon
Spent a weekend that felt just like heaven
She was camped near boy scouts
Who were horrible louts

A naughty young schoolgirl from Devon
Spent a weekend that felt just like heaven
She was camped near boy scouts
Who were horrible louts
Threw their woggles right at her, head on!

I once met a guy name of Billy

I once met a guy name of Billy
Whose granny was ever so silly

I once met a guy name of Billy
Whose granny was ever so silly
She went up in a lift

I once met a guy name of Billy
Whose granny was ever so silly
She went up in a lift
Wearing only her shift

I once met a guy name of Billy
Whose granny was ever so silly
She went up in a lift
Wearing only her shift
And emerged at the top feeling chilly

I once knew a boy who was shy

I once knew a boy who was shy,
Never looked a girl in the eye

I once knew a boy who was shy,
Never looked a girl in the eye
He always blushed pink

I once knew a boy who was shy,
Never looked a girl in the eye
He always blushed pink
Never dared give a wink

I once knew a boy who was shy,
Never looked a girl in the eye
He always blushed pink
Never dared give a wink
In case he made her cry

There was a mad dog called Dave

There was a mad dog called Dave
He was mad but not terribly brave

There was a mad dog called Dave
He was mad but not terribly brave
He was scared of all cats

There was a mad dog called Dave
He was mad but not terribly brave
He was scared of all cats
Even those sat on mats

There was a mad dog called Dave
He was mad but not terribly brave
He was scared of all cats
Even those sat on mats
So he curled up alone in his cave

Thank God Christmas comes once a year

Thank God Christmas comes once a year
Can't cope with any more, I fear

Thank God Christmas comes once a year
Can't cope with any more, I fear
I'm very often reduced to tears

Thank God Christmas comes once a year
Can't cope with any more, I fear
I'm very often reduced to tears
And what about the price of the beers!

Too many ears or eers

Thank God Christmas comes once a year
Can't cope with any more, I fear
What with fairies and elves

NannyTee An adapted version if that's OK with you!

Thank God Christmas comes once a year
Can't cope with any more, I fear
I'm reduced to tears
About the price of beers!
Don't mention the words "Good Cheer"!