Limericks - 2

There was a Tory named Boris
Whose best chum at work was called Horace
There once was a Tory named Boris
Whose best chum at work was called Horace
They schemed and they plotted

There was a Tory named Boris
Whose best chum at work was called Horace

The gritters are out once again
The ice is becoming a pain
Our road's like an ice rink
Making us turning to drink
Hoping we'll get plenty of rain!

There was a Tory named Boris

The gritters are out once again
The ice is becoming a pain
Our road's like an ice rink
Making us turning to drink

The gritters are out once again
The ice is becoming a pain
Our road's like an ice
Making us turning to drink

The gritters are out once again
The ice is becoming a pain
Our road's like an ice rink

The gritters are out once again
The ice is becoming a pain

The gritters are out once again

There was a young man of Tiree
Had a nasty boil on his knee
Wanting to propose
He thought - Heaven knows
Whatever will be, will be

There was a young man of Tiree
Had a nasty boil on his knee
Wanting to propose
He thought - Heaven knows

There was a young man of Tiree
Had a nasty boil on his knee
Wanting to propose

There was a young man from Tiree
Had a nasty boil on his knee

Look, the sky's pelting down rain
It does it again and again
The lawn's like a bog
I've just stepped on a frog!
I’m finding this weather a strain

There was a young man from Tiree

Look, the sky's pelting down rain
It does it again and again
The lawn's like a bog
I've just stepped on a frog!

Look, the sky's pelting down rain
It does it again and again
The lawn's like a bog

Look, the sky's pelting down rain
It does it again and again

It's off to the shops I go
Now we're not covered in snow
I'll spend 'til I drop
Please don't tell me to stop
Until my bank balance is low!

Look, the sky's pelting down rain

It's off to the shops I go
Now we're not covered in snow
I'll spend 'til I drop
Please don't tell me to stop

It's off to the shops I go
Now we're not covered in snow
I'll spend 'til I drop

Wot!

It's off to the shops I go
Now we're not covered in snow

The sheep in the fields are so chilly
I hope they're not addled and silly

The sheep in the fields are so chilly
They run around feeling so silly
Let's knit them a jumper
To make them look plumper
And long enough to cover their willy!

It's off to the shops I go

The sheep in the fields are so chilly
They run around feeling so silly
Let's knit them a jumper
To make them look plumper

The sheep in the fields are so chilly
They run around feeling so silly
Let's knit them a jumper

The sheep in the fields are so chilly
They run around feeling so silly