Limericks - 2

The snow has been falling all day
I watch with increasing dismay
But let's build an igloo!
Big enough for us two!
Inside we'll be snug as we play!!

I am off to see the dentist

My smile has gone all C-list

Oops!
I'm off to see the dentist
My smile has gone all C-list

I'm off to see the dentist
My smile has gone all C-list
But when I'm in the chair

I'm off to see the dentist
My smile has gone all C-list
But when I'm in the chair
I'm floating on air

I'm off to see the dentist
My smile has gone all C-list
But when I'm in the chair
I'm floating on air
The gas makes me all Brahms and Liszt!

They'll have to come out the dentist said

They'll have to come out the dentist said
Oh dear! that'll be a pain in my head

They'll have to come out the dentist said
Oh dear! that'll be a pain in my head
With my new plastic dentures

They'll have to come out the dentist said
Oh dear! that'll be a pain in my head
With my new plastic dentures
I'll have loads of adventures

They'll have to come out the dentist said
Oh dear! that'll be a pain in my head
With my new plastic dentures.
I'll have great new adventures

They'll have to come out the dentist said
Oh dear! that'll be a pain in my head
With my new plastic dentures.
I'll have great new adventures
And who knows where I'll be led!

Oops!

There once was a Gran on the net

Who wrote dodgy verse for a bet

There once was a Gran on the net
Who wrote dodgy verse for a bet

There once was a Gran on the net
Who wrote dodgy verse for a bet
She started a thread

There once was a Gran on the net
Who wrote dodgy verse for a bet
She started a thread
In great fear and dread

There once was a Gran on the net
Who wrote dodgy verse for a bet
She started a thread
In great fear and dread
Afraid of the comments she'd get

I once spent a week on the moon

I once spent a week on the moon
I went in a dish, with a spoon

I once spent a week on the moon
I went in a dish, with a spoon
The cat played his fiddle

I once spent a week on the moon
I went in a dish, with a spoon
The cat played his fiddle
And I did a piddle

I once spent a week on the moon
I went in a dish, with a spoon
The cat played his fiddle
And I did a piddle
Cos I didn't think much of his tune.

Are you sure that there's room on the bus?

Are you sure that there's room on the bus?
Yes, for lovely slim people like us!

Are you sure that there's room on the bus?
Yes, for lovely slim people like us!
So I took out my pass

Are you sure that there's room on the bus?
Yes, for lovely slim people like us!
So I took out my pass
But saw seats were sparse

Are you sure that there's room on the bus?
Yes, for lovely slim people like us!
So I took out my pass
But saw seats were sparse
So got off as I have a big A**e!!!

Off to see a dragon