Patronising comments about mature love

We quite often hold hands, especially out walking - helps with balance apart from anything else. 67 is young, we have ‘new’ couples in their 80 s at our Probus club and they often cuddle up to each other. Just think, jealousy is a curse, when people make nasty comments!

I will Dickens if him indoors is up for it outdoors 🤭

I’d never comment on anything like that but inside I’d be thinking it was a lovely thing to see. Perhaps it gladdens people’s hearts to see other people so happy. ❤️

Oreo

It isn’t that you have found love again OP it’s the fact you’re holding hands, which many couples still do even at Golden Wedding age.
We sometimes hold hands but have never had any comments, but in any case I would have just laughed if we had done.
Am now tempted to have a public full on snog just to see if anyone reacts😄

Am now tempted to have a public full on snog just to see if anyone reacts

Please do that - and report back to us!

All I can say is good for you... How wonderful to find someone after a long time on your own.
My Grandmother, in her 80's several years after my Grandad died met a gentleman they became inseparable in their later life.
They had many happy years together, she passed away at 89 he went 6 months later.

I don’t actually like holding hands with MrA……but having limited mobility I do have to have a little extra support occasionally. Not holding hands certainly isn’t an indication that a couple aren’t in love and the suggestion that some random couple are more in love than another couple just beggars belief.

I really don't think the comments are born out of jealousy. Nor do I consider the comments patronising.
It seems to me that people recognise that you are in love and say what they feel.
As I am someone who found love again after being widowed I think you should take the comments as compliments.
I wish you every happiness.

Feeling patronised doesn't necessarily mean someone was being patronising.

You can let such things wash over you and enjoy your happiness. Would you rather people scowled and looked disgusted? THAT could be ageist and patronising.

It isn’t that you have found love again OP it’s the fact you’re holding hands, which many couples still do even at Golden Wedding age.
We sometimes hold hands but have never had any comments, but in any case I would have just laughed if we had done.
Am now tempted to have a public full on snog just to see if anyone reacts😄

ginny

I can’t actually see what you are objecting to PetiFromage. They seem perfectly nice comments to me.
I very pleased for you.

Agreed.

I found a second love and yes we hold hands as a routine, we have been together 7 yrs now and have never had any negative comment, we certainly never feel self conscious about it.

Young just people dont conceive their parents or even grandparents being romantic, in our case it's very obvious

I can’t actually see what you are objecting to PetiFromage. They seem perfectly nice comments to me.
I very pleased for you.

Jealousy is ugly whatever form it takes. Be happy !!

Slightly off topic, I love Hilary Boyd's books about love in the over 60s, they're really wonderful.

Society in general doesn't like the idea of older people being in love and they certainly don't like the idea of older people having sexual relationships!
It's all part of ageism I'm afraid.
This morning I've been for an annual review at my surgery and lost count of the times the nurse called me 'lovely' or said 'bless you'.
Maybe I should have blessed her when she took my blood pressure and then again for getting my blood sample at the first attempt.
I'm 71 and was working in the NHS until last year. Can't stand the use of these patronisations. Diversity is great and to be embraced, but it doesn't seem to be applied to older people.

My MIL found love again after nearly ten years of widowhood. She was in her late 70s. There surely is no age limit. It was lovely that they found each other as they were very happy. I wish the same for you and your partner.

Very happy for you. DH and I have been married over 60 years, together 65. We still hold hands. Ignore the unintelligent, the jealous and the just plain ignorant. Enjoy and celebrate what you have. Good luck.

I hold hands with my husband just in case I fall! 😃seriously though take no notice love is love and enjoy it! Be happy!

You keep holding on to your partners hand- they just sound jealous!

No reason at all. I hope you and your partner are very happy together.

Sometimes people just don’t know what to say, and sometimes young people can’t imagine being older - remember we were once young, but they have never been our age 😀. Ignore the lot of them, and enjoy your love. 🥰