Luckygirl and Smileless, yes, I do agree. I too have had 2 years of poor behaviour, often hard and very cruel, which seems to have become a type of estrangement from my daughter, who emigrated 7 years ago roughly, but said we were "unsupportive", and that she "didn't feel loved", despite our financial help, and offers to stay to help when her baby was born. It really hurts. So, I too feel your pain. You have really tried, and done so much for your daughter, it was your best and what you thought she wanted. You can only do what is in your power. It seems to me that this is a generational problem. I also have a neice who is, being very cruel to my brother in law, and his wife, for no real reason. Her behaviour is worse, but I won't go into that now. Suffice to say, this behaviour is all too common these days sadly. This current child bearing generation acts with a sense of entitlement, has selfish behaviour, really very mean behaviour, and, in our case, that seems to the beginning of an estrangement, something we don't want, but seem powerless to stop happening, and that estrangement is sadly increasingly common. It seems to us that this generation (born 1990 to 2000) are cruel, and selfish? If you had offered help, perhaps it would have may been refused, just like mine was! Emigration complicates what should have been a happy time, instead we feel bereft, and grief at what we have lost, and are so sad that what we thought we would have, a GC who would know us, which is now seemingy no longer possible. Although your daughter is nearer, her behaviour seems strikingly similar to our daughter's, (who we now think must have some kind of MHP.) We have had to accept that we have no control over the situation, other than to start trying to start to live our lives as happily as we can here, without her, or our GC in it, and with no contact with our GC, which hurts us both deeply. Our D's behaviour, like your daughter's, is both thoughtless, and so destructive. Try to protect yourself. We do understand what you are experiencing, and sadly it appears to be all too common these days. Also, if you can, try to keep a diary, as that will help you to see things as they really are, not how your D (and others see them), which seem to me to sound like a distorted version of events. It helps later for you to read your thoughts on events, (even much later) and then you will see why you are justified to feel as hurt as you do. Try also to shield yourself from further hurt, by not paying too much attention when she is being mean. Your feelings are valid, and you have a right to be treated with respect. You should feel loved and appreciated. Remember, you have done nothing wrong, and that you are not alone. There are others out there likd you. We too are going through hurt and grief. Sending very best wishes. I hope things resolve themselves with time.
). Mentally I am now in a much stronger frame of mind thanks to this wonderful community
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