Grandson has failed his Degree

Congratulations to your grandson (and his sister) crazyH and good luck with the job hunting. My oldest granddaughter graduated in July and starts a post grad job in the city on Monday, working towards becoming a Chartered Accountant. 😊

It is all very intense in the family situation, and whilst you can understand the disappointment it is not helping your grandson. Is there a way that he could volunteer with something he is interested in, or possibly help at some sort of camp such as scouts or possibly some overseas charity where he could get a wider view of life and come to see that however difficult a situation is it is only part of life and not all consuming. His life at the moment is rather looking into a mirror and not liking what he sees. By focusing on something totally outside of his own situation, he could learn quite a lot and also get things into perspective, whilst possible finding that there is another area in life that he can enjoy and be good at. You are doing a great job in supporting him, and I think less concentration on the failure and looking around at other things should help to take the pressure off and allow him to think where he wants to go next.

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I agree with M0nica. His mother should be truly and utterly ashamed of herself. My son (my only child) is disabled. Tell her to count her blessings and thank god every single day for a healthy and happy child.

crazyH

Update
My GS did his re-sits and has now got his degree. Yesterday, we went to his younger sister’s graduation - she got a 1st. He is very proud of her.
Petra- yes we were disappointed at the time.. *Ofcourse we told him “it wasn’t the end of the world “ *- the very same words, but we also encouraged him to re-sit and we’re glad we did. . In the meanwhile, he had one or two great holidays with his golfing friends and is, as we speak, preparing a CV, to send out to prospective employers. Fingers crossed, he will find a job soon.

All's well that ends well!

Primrose53

University education is not essential for getting on in life. Today I have been to a funeral. It was a huge church and packed.

Family members read out their memories of X who they said was not academic but was very bright and could turn his hand to anything. He started from nothing, leaving school with no qualifications but a drive to do well.

With his brother they built up a coach business and now employ loads of people, and take thousands of people all over the country on luxury coaches and on holidays abroad. He has a lovely family, beautiful home and all the trappings of a fine businessman.

Indeed.

Well done them.

Concentrate on one thing at a time. The first thing he needs to do is go and see his tutors and find out what he failed and how he can retake it.

Forget about his sexuality, that is just a diversion and is nobodies business but his.

His mother should be ashamed of herself.

Thank goodness he is with you. Try to tell him that it isn’t the end of the world and there are so many other options. The world is his oyster. I have two grandsons. One had no interest in university and the other did and came out with a first. Both earn the same kind of money and both are successful. His parents should be grateful that they did not attend a degree ceremony,like parents at my grandson’s graduation,in order to receive the degree which their son would have had if he hadn’t committed suicide.

Well done both!

Great news

Well done to your DGS for persevering, crazyH, well worth it.

Also congratulations to your DGD.

Fabulous news all round crazyH 🥰

The point of university isn’t’t to enable you to earn a lot of money. It’s to enrich your mind and therefore your life. Should be, anyway.

My mother told me it was a way to pass the time for three or four years, and meet a man who ought to end up earning enough to keep me and a family.

Yes, really. This was in 1975.
🙄

Update
My GS did his re-sits and has now got his degree. Yesterday, we went to his younger sister’s graduation - she got a 1st. He is very proud of her.
Petra- yes we were disappointed at the time.. *Ofcourse we told him “it wasn’t the end of the world “ *- the very same words, but we also encouraged him to re-sit and we’re glad we did. . In the meanwhile, he had one or two great holidays with his golfing friends and is, as we speak, preparing a CV, to send out to prospective employers. Fingers crossed, he will find a job soon.

This thread is a year old.
How has he got on in the meantime OP?

.......................* Thread started in JULY 2023!*

BlueBelle
I couldn’t agree more. Poor little bugger.
So different to when my grandson failed. We all rallied round assuring him it was the end of the world.
His father never went to university and neither did one of my daughters but both are exceedingly high earners.

Is this an old thread?

Once the dust has settled a little, I would advise that he contacts his university to find out if there is a way of resitting. Seems a shame to have studied for three years, only to lose it at the last hurdle. If he is certain he wants nothing more to do with his subject or the uni, perhaps it is best to look at his strengths and interests and to start exploring those avenues. Whatever, he needs to be the driving force himself until he finds his groove. Been there and all does come true in the end albeit 50 years ago for me. He will find his true path.

I have a lovely GS who has one more year of a 4-year course and has struggled. We're just hoping he'll make it through.
Thanks for all the encouraging stories.

crazyH

Oh gosh - I thought this post was lost in Space.😂 I haven’t seen him for a couple of weeks. He has a girl-friend now. His first. His studies are a sore point in the family. I know he is off with a couple of his friends to Canada, on the 9th June. He seems to be happy working in the Golf Club, earning money to pay for his trip. Thanks for all your replies. x

It all sounds more positive now, crazyH, so hope all works out for your grandson and that he is happy and healthy.