Could someone tell me how to ask Gransnet to take down my initial post please.
Good Morning Sunday 21st June 2026
Last three letters contd - 2026
It began as group support during difficult times and although Covid has faded a little, the friendship has endured and become stronger.
Still here for anyone to join a non-judgemental, caring thread during the often challenging time in life.
We don't have all the answers but in the spirit of Doodle and Cherry who began it all, and with a happy lobster as our mascot, we do offer friendship and often a bit of very cheeky chat.
Could someone tell me how to ask Gransnet to take down my initial post please.
Iâm often surprised by the response to a non regular poster on threads that claim to be inclusive and friendly. RosiesMaw fwiw I agree with you about so called âbanterâ. The idea of calling you âspitefulâ is a curiosity as it really doesnât reflect your posts
I'm getting messages from the airport where Gubbins is dashing around organising everyone; DS says she is SO excited.
Their plane leaves at 9pm and it was hoped she'd be tired, instead, she's wired 
DS flies out tomorrow after lunch. I'll be tracking both flights in between a trip to the doctor and trying, yet again, to whip the last chapter of the book into shape.
Such a lot of research to do and results are surprising too - did you know that birthday cake with candles (blown out, make a wish) is a symbol of death? Goes back to Romans and Greeks - 'Many happy returns
.
Nursery rhymes deal with it; our everyday language is full of references - and so familiar we never give it a second thought.
"Ted's used the last of the milk again, I could kill 'im".
There's a lesson there
I'm aiming to get it finished and edited befoe New Year - and then begins the long haul of finding an interested publisher. But at least that bit will be gentler on the eyes.
X-rays went fine yesterday - such a lovely technician, made me laugh and was very helpful and kind.
I'll get the results tomorrow.
Very hot today - Google says 21 degrees but that's out at the airport; here I'm sure it's at least 24 - but cooler in my little whare with all doors and windows open 
Have a good day everyone 
And apologising because you know it's going to cause upset? That's just spiteful
I had hoped to choose my words more diplomatically when I raised an objection to the idea of a gleeful welcome to scantily clad young men - âbutlers in the buffâ - but clearly not diplomatic enough.
I had no spiteful agenda and am very hurt that it was construed thus. Saying what I believe to be right has always been of more importance to me than being popular .
Nor am I a snarky killjoy, as suggested by another poster, just uncomfortable with an apparently female equivalent of the sort of âbanterâ Gregg Wallace seems to find acceptable. I may be one of that group of âmiddle class women of a certain ageâ he objects to, but if so I am proud that my years have given me the confidence to speak out when I see wrong.
So I apologise if it derailed your thread, that was never my intention and as this pic shows I clearly suffered the penalty of perhaps rashly dipping my toe into the water.
Good to see you posting Ziplock - please can I come to your house for cake on Christmas Day? 
Jan your poor girl is having it hard at the moment, isn't she, you must be worried but this too will pass
.
Grammaretto you are a great example of 'Feel the fear and do it anyway' - it'll all work out and of course you're worried, who wouldn't be by such huge changes but you're made of strong stuff. Coinnigh ort!
My dgd1, did a sort of gap-decade! 
It began as a gap year after the hospitality course she applied for at 18, advised her to get 'real life experience' first.
Like so many teenagers, she had no realidea of what she wanted to do and sadly, that's often seen as a fault. It's not, it's normal.
So off she went to london (both her birth father, my DS1 and the lovely man who married her Mum are from UK) and after that, went all round Europe with friends she met there.
Despite getting excellent grades at school, the very specific world of university didn't appeal either as a teen or when she
came home, so she then worked at various jobs quite happily until at 30, was 'persuaded' to think about some sort of training, 'for a proper career'.
She's now a qualified Quantity Surveyor, having started with the firm as a temp and liked the look of the job.
Currently she's doing very well and enjoying it.
She's just bought a house but she's always said how much of me she sees in herself.
Had I been able, her life is one I too would have loved to lead: - ever changing, new experiences, travelling, learning.
So one day, I am convinced she'll rent out her house and move on yet again - and thank goodness she can.
Neither of my sons had gap years as such, or went to Uni just took their time deciding while working at other things as DGd has done.
DS1 started his own IT consultancy company in Australia. DS2, went into IT full time as well.
It is better, in my opinion, to look at the character and personality of the young person and what's going to make them happiest, rather than anxiously try to impose a cookie-cutter idea on them. Especially as so many graduates, over half according to LinkedIn, don't actually use their degrees.
Many feel they wasted those years and racked up student loan debts they wish they did not have.
I'm going to plant my sunflowers and tomato plants today.

Evening all. Iâve been out most of the afternoon at the dentist and shopping (although I didnât actually buy anything đ€)
Grammaretto are you ok with the actual plans now? Itâs a big project and without the full support of your DC I can understand how it will be quite daunting. Just make sure the design is as you want it.
Of course youâre anxious. Any change causes worry but you know you have to move sometime and you have often said you donât really want to leave your home
Perhaps this is the best solution
Cant wait till itâs built so we can all come and see you
Sorry no gap year experience here
*Jan glad your DD is home again that must be a relief. Sounds like a nice weekend with your other daughter too.
Ixion yea! Catch up later
Ziolock thatâs nice of you to pop in. Lovely to have you with us. Your cake sounds lovely. Is it a new recipe or one youâve made before?
I donât often post here, but just wanted to pop in to say hello. It seems a very friendly and supportive thread.
Itâs taken me a while to feel as if Iâve got going with Christmas preps too Jan16, but actually, when I think about it, Iâve been doing a bit here and there and realise Iâm more ahead than I thought đđŒ. Still got the cake to make, but thatâs this coming weekends job as itâs Deliaâs whiskey Dundee recipe and doesnât need the maturing time a traditional cake does.
We cut down on Christmas presents a couple of years ago - it certainly simplifies things for all concerned.
How exciting for you Gramaretto đ€all goes as you hope.
Back later - when I have personally responded to those who have shown me love, kindness and support.
Thank you everyone and apologies where I have inadvertently upset the equilibrium of our lovely thread.
đŠ
Oooops!! I pop in for a quick nose and thought I had landed in a parallel universe!! Im say no more except Good Afternoon all!
I cant believe we are so near to Christmas. I have done absolutely nothing about it. We are cutting down on presents this year as no one really wants anything because nowadays if you want something you just go out and buy it!
We are going to friends for Christmas day this year and family will be here for New Year. Youngest daughter- canât remember where I got up to in this long saga- but shes home and now has a stinking cold! Calcium levels are still low so more pills have been prescribed! Daughter no 1 plus son in law were here for last weekend which was lovely if exhausting- not much stamina nowadays!
Great news from Gramaretto that her plans have gone in. Fingers crossed all goes well. Hope everyone is ok and no Ixion definitely dont go. We need all our friends on this great site.
My next question is:
Do any Lobstars have experience of DC or DGC doing gap years?
Only one of my DC did and loved living in Guatemala for a year, volunteering, working and learning to speak Spanish. But when she began University here in Scotland, she was bored and felt out of place in the academic world. It felt like being back at school. She dropped out after a year and after 2 more practical but very different courses she now has a career as a photographer.
However my DGS is thinking of doing a gap year but his DP (my son and Dil) think he will be making a mistake and want him to go straight to university.
I would love to hear of your experience.
NotSpag đđ€Łđ
You are invited in advance to my house warming.
Although being carbon neutral, passivhaus, it will be warm already.
*Well I think it's hugely exciting.
Once it's happening I hope you will too!*
X
I'm actually terrified NotSpaghetti and trying not to think about it. I probably won't hear until we'll into the new year.
I have to pay the architect too so am having serious doubts about the whole project.
I'm doing some family history research on Scotland's people for a couple of friends. A good distraction.
Autocorrect sends catches and not cwtches but you know what I mean!
How exciting to have your house plans submitted Grammaretto
đĄ
I'm keeping fingers and toes crossed for you
đ€
Good evening Lobstars,
I have only just found this new thread. Nice to read supportive posts.
Thanks Grandmafrench and others.
I hope chatting on here relieves worries and distracts from pain and miserable thoughts.
Therapy, that's what it is.
I haven't much to add. My house plans have been submitted for planning permission and my new Helper has arrived and is being useful. He's also good company.
He's on what he calls an Odyssey. He's taken 3 years off his job to work his way around the British Isles having adventures and helping people on his way. He was brought up on a farm in Dorset.
Sending catches to all who need them.
Doodle
*Dear gang. I have asked GNHQ to delete Ixionâs post and Naughtyneineâs* not because I have any objection to either (taking both in the spirit they were meant) but because hopefully, we can avoid any more inappropriate comments, *
*Ixion and Naughtyneine, looking forward to hearing from you both soom*
Ixion and Naughtyneine Looking forward to hearing your posts on this thread too.
PECS - đ
Dear gang. I have asked GNHQ to delete Ixionâs post and Naughtyneineâs not because I have any objection to either (taking both in the spirit they were meant) but because hopefully, we can avoid any more inappropriate comments, *
Ixion and Naughtyneine, looking forward to hearing from you both soom
if the picture was of young women and older men were commenting..as in sexual innuendo... would you think it appropriate? We cannot complain about casual sexism, men objectifying women and then behave in the same way! I like a laugh and a bit of fun but find this just smutty.. 'banter' is a cop out excuse for inappropriate comments/behaviour.
Grandmafrench, thank you for another kind and supportive post, a thoughtful one too. I hope by now your DH is out of surgery and it has gone well. Sending you a warm cwtch lovely lady.
Nfk
Post just in says our local boy, Stan Walker, is to appear at our Waitangi Day celebrations again.
50,000 people attended last year - can you imagine the total traffic chaos in our small suburb? 
It's just up the road from where I live.
Maybe I'll get to meet him again.
Grandmafrench THANK YOU, you are so kind to write uplifting and supportive posts and I wish you were up to joining us but I understand if you are not. I know you are with us, cheering on in the background.
I do hope your DH recovers well.
It's clear that anyone who begins a post with an apology, knows full well they are going to hurt or offend and thus spoil the atmosphere here.
Especially, as Grammaretto says, there was absolutely NO comparison between the post criticised and the incidents to which it was compared.
ixion if you leave us, I shall instruct my DS (who will be in the UK from 7th) to hunt you down and tickle you until you relent. And believe me, he can do it.
See picture, fully clothed, of him and Gubbins at work together.
Note the broad back he inherited from his mother (who has, incidentally heard more insults and cruel jokes about being fat than the sour poster could dream about in a lifetine).
We're adults, we're wise, we turn into ducks when such things rain down and it just runs off our backs.
Carry on Lobstars, you and our loyal friends in the background are absolute magic!
Thank you Jax. Thatâs very kind
Oh Grandmafrench I do hope by now youâve had good news about your DH. Your posts on here and to me personally have always been so thoughtful and lovely. Please let us know how your DH is getting on. You are in my prayers. You are welcome to post anytime.
Naughtyneine and Notspaghetti please keep posting. As you say a misunderstanding
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