Went out to bring in bin and got ambushed by neighbour of no 4. There are 3 houses in a line. I live at no 2. No 3 is a neighbour I have never got on with, now clearly with dementia or similar. Unable to follow a conversation or simple instructions and becoming very aggressive if she does not immediately get her way. Husband of 3 died 2 years ago, a kindly but weak man who was relentlessly bullied by her. We have never got on in the 20 years Ive lived here and I no longer open the door to her. There is a walkway behind the houses and Ive seen her drifting along wearing what look like pyjamas and flip flops (with no coat) on a very cold day. Seems to have been befriended by no 4 who lives on the other side.
4 tells me a rambling story about how 3 lived with her adult daughter for months following husbands death but had now returned. Daughter and sibling want to sell the house and use the money to buy a bigger property so 3 can live with daughter. However 3 has dug her heels in and refused to leave the 5 bed family home where she now lives alone. Both adult children live a distance away and can only visit every 2/3 weeks. Daughter is very worried about her mum and tries to phone every day. 3 does not always answer or return calls and sometimes daughter can go several days without speaking to mum.
Daughter and 4 have come up with a plan to have 2 immediate neighbours hold keys and provide a contact number. Daughter can then phone keyholder (in case of no contact with mum) and ask them to call round (and/if necessary) to use key to make sure all is well with 3. 4 tells me she is happy to be a keyholder but she has a “very important job” as an area sales manager and is often away. So she and daughter thought I might like to be the other keyholder. At this point she stands outside my (locked) gate dangling a set of keys in her hand.
I was tempted to tell her that I also have a “very important job” in that I run an international business. However this is not information I share with neighbours. It was more the annoying inference that I had time on my hands which was less valuable than her “very important” managerial position.
For multiple reasons I said absolutely no. Main reason being that I myself have significant mobility issues and would be of no use in case 3 needed physical assistance of any kind. We have never got on and I am reluctant to get involved in her affairs. I asked if this “plan” had been discussed with 3, as I cannot imagine my being at the top of a list of potential people whom 3 might want to enter her home unannounced. Even if I was physically fit I would be very reluctant to go alone into someone’s home in such circumstances.
4 tried to guilt me by saying well it probably wont happen very often and surely you can do a small kindness for a sick neighbour whose family live elsewhere. I suspect that this plan had been dreamed up between 4 and the daughter without any reference to or consultation with 3.
I left 4 standing there and told her my answer was final. There are plenty of able bodied neighbours she and daughter can ask to participate in their little scheme. When I told my nephew the first thing he said was that I could be accused (by the relatives) of stealing something or abusing or harming 3, given our stormy history and her tendency to become aggressive without warning.
🦞 The Lockdown Gang still chatting 🦞
LIMERICKS (April 2025 contd August 2026)
