Have you got to this stage of life ?

I spend too. Coffee out today, saw a lipstick I liked and just ordered it online. I treat my family as well.
I realise some people are not in my position though.

SpinDriftCoastal

I make sure I am comfortable i.e. clothes that fit, shoes that I can walk in, a bed I can lie on, and a chair I can sit it. Taps. toilets, showers, etc that work. Those are my priorities.

Absolutely 👍🏻

grandMattie

I had, a rather substantial sum of money for holidays, meals out etc.
A couple of years ago, I idiotically handed it all over to spammers. The financial ombudsman decided it was all my fault, the bank behaved impeccably…
So now, I’m managing on my pension with enough not to struggle, but I feel rather like a student, watching (almost) every penny. It can be very tiresome.
What will happen when I need a care home, goodness knows?

Really? That is awful grandmatti. It could happen to any one of us as these scammers are so clever with this AI. Its truly frightening 😩

Marzipan22

I've lived on the breadline for years and managed by not having a car or holidays or treats, but it's been fine because living in Cornwall is a daily joy in so many ways anyway. The beaches are free. However, a strange turn of events means I now have some extra funds so I can afford to take trains to places, go to the cinema and buy decent shoes and M&S salmon. 😂

Oh, marzipan what was the turn of events?

It’s tricky to gauge how much to spend from the pension pot as non of us know exactly how long it needs to last for

I have been careful with my money all my life as we had a hard upbringing, never hungry or homeless but things were tight!
My parents left me some money as they had their own properties eventually and I worked hard to get an occupational pension !
Now I am still careful, refuse to be ripped off but if I want to go away I do! But I still save every month! It is ingrained into me!

I have a friend who to me, is dripping in money. She and her DH both inherited property located in capital city rom parents. Yet, you'd think they didn't tuppence. I get so annoyed listening to her conversations on how much everything costs, they only go to small air bnbs for their holidays, driving everywhere. Would never go abroad, flights too expensive and they'd have to buy meals whereas staying in UK they can take a lot of food with them. I asked if she'd like to go to a show, all up for it until I showed her the cost of tickets. Some folk will have pockets in their shroud, me if I think I'd like something and can afford it, I go for it. As my mum used to say, "you're a long time dead, enjoy youself now".

How right you are Fallingstar!

We are that post war generation, a time when people had to be careful and creative with their resources.
We weren't tempted by advertising pressure as much as the current generation.
My parents and grandparents were all very practical people who could turn their hands to anything.
A lot of this has rubbed off on me. (And I am Scottish born.)
If I can make something, I am delighted to do that, rather than buy it, so that tipped the balance recently for me when I was considering the purchase of a high end sewing machine.
On the one hand it was expensive; I wondered if it was too extravagant; was it worth it given how old I am, ; was I worth it!
On the other hand I thought of all the hours of fun I would have upgrading to a more reliable machine, and that I might live another twenty years, and then, quite frankly I just thought Sod it! And my frugality was banished.
I have had it about 6 months and have not regreted it for one minute .
I think we have probably all worked hard enough over the years to have earned a little treat now and again.
No one can know what tomorrow will bring, so we might as well enjoy today while we can.

I’ve always been ‘a spender’. It’s in my nature to splurge.
Shame really as I have champagne tastes and lager money but 🤷‍♀️

If I’ve 10p in my pocket I have to spend it has pretty much always been my mantra.

I love buying presents as ‘thank you’s’ for my friends and I’m generous with family but do so discreetly. I never tell friends what I treat my family to. As Himself used to say “it’s not about blowing our own trumpets but it definitely is about giving them some dignity as they have friends too and so it’s better to be discreet.”

My irish mam used to say "there's no hitch on a hearse"

It’s taken me a few weeks get a cleaner here, mainly guilt that I should be doing it, but after hip palaver I can’t yet and partly the cost- echoes of my mother.
She came yesterday, should have done it sooner.

I have a friend who is so frugal it's painful to watch. She never buys anything for herself. She only shops at 4pm when the yellow ticketed items arrive. The happiness she gets when buying food that is about to go out of date is immeasurable. She will happily eat out of date food. Waste isn't a concept she knows of. All well be good and she's happy but I find it exhausting. She always trying to barter people down.

We're lucky enough to have enough to live happily on and spend, bit in a reckless fashion, but enough to have extras

Yes , spending the kids inheritance or avoiding IHT is a good excuse for staying in 5* hotels on our few trips and shopping in M and S or Waitrose as well as Aldi.

I like your style nana!
I try to think like that but frugal me wins.

I am in the process of selling my house and part of me thinks I won't buy another but rather rent somewhere fairly cheaply and free up cash to travel or to spend on the family.

gMattie's. cautionary tale looms large. 😯

About care homes; my DM hated the idea and in the end she died very quickly in her 90s and never needed one but she dreaded the thought of having to listen to pop music or watch soaps all day.
Her friend reminded her that by the time she was at that stage, she wouldn't know or care!

I inherited a reasonable amount when my mother died but still find my frugal self making me feel guilty when I spend money! I’ve spent my life working hard and being careful with money so am managing to change my mindset a bit.
I’ve ring-fenced a chunk of my savings and the rest is for what I see as luxuries (but which perhaps aren’t.) A nice break in a luxury hotel with my daughter and buying good quality clothing and cosmetics. Also lots of coffees out!
I’m bloody worth it I tell you 🤣

Good advice Fallingstar. Some members of our family seem to think we should stay home and not take what they see as ‘risks’ in travelling etc but you only live once and when they are older perhaps they would see things through a different lens.

Fallingstar

I just wish we had spent more on ourselves and enjoyed doing the things we thought were too costly because now my DH has had a massive stroke and I am his full time carer. Of course we did enjoy life and travelled etc., but we always held back on some things that we really wanted to do.
So a word from the wise, if you are still able to enjoy the good things in life and have the money to do so, don’t wait, it is later than you think.

GrannyGravy13

I am minded of the phrase ^there are no pockets in a shroud^

My MiL used to say of her sister in law (very well off but exceedingly miserly aunt of dh and his brothers), ‘Don’t expect anything there - she’ll find a way to take it with her!’

Went to a local hardware shop yesterday after a trip to the dentist and bought a couple of cheap plants from their limited collection; a fern and a lavender. They’re currently on my potting bench outside the kitchen window and it makes me so happy just looking at them and deciding where to plant them.

keepcalmandcavachon

I've got to the stage where I don't say yes to things I don't want to do anymore or tolerate being aroud negative folk.
I've got to the stage where I know what colours & styles suit and don't worry about trends and -
I've got to the stage of knowing what brings joy and how to prioritise it.
Sometimes these things envolve money, often not but I this is what freedom looks like to me

Totally agree with you.

I absolutely agree with you 100%!

Take more photos and post them all on social media -those who are on there - or print them out and put them on a pinboard - I do both.

I make sure I have enough of the essentials, food/liquids, clothing, money for rent, my car, etc., but other than that, that Magnum ice lolly and a bottle of Thatchers Cider look delicious, so I'm having them!

OMG! That t-shirt is £40.00 - mine!

Ages ago, I bought from Robo Pets: Percy Kitten 1.1 Black and White, £104.99, Luxurious Handmade Black & White Cat Backpack, £64.99, and Buddy - Robotic Companion Puppy for £105.99. So, £275.97 well spent. I love them. I can't take my babies with me when I die, so I'm having them while I'm alive and kicking!

If you want something and if you can afford it, go for it!

My mother was very frugal as I was growing up, dad was a miner so his wages weren't big and she had to watch every penny. I suppose that has rubbed off on me.
I've never splurged on expensive clothes, food, holidays etc, always in the back of my mind was the nagging premise that I should save for my old age and comfort in retirement.
But at the end of the day, I've realised that I've been denying myself the little luxuries that I've earned and should be enjoying now while I can. It's no good having a nest egg only to potentially end up giving it all to a care home.
I gave myself a talking to and decided to stop being like my mother, who didn't have the choice I do, and start living for the day. I've secured my children's inheritance, so now if I need something or even if I don't, I'm going to buy it and enjoy it. As someone up thread said, 'there are no pockets in shrouds'

I've got to the stage where I don't say yes to things I don't want to do anymore or tolerate being aroud negative folk.
I've got to the stage where I know what colours & styles suit and don't worry about trends and -
I've got to the stage of knowing what brings joy and how to prioritise it.
Sometimes these things envolve money, often not but I this is what freedom looks like to me