How to age with dignity

Once I reached 60 I decided to grow older disgrafully. And loving every minute of it. Now 68 been widowed since I was 45 . So doing everything my husband wanted ne to do . Moving to the north west changed my life for the better when I was 61. I am doing all the things I want to do. Until 2017 people dependant on me. Moving i found me again. But the best thing that has happened I have GPs who sent me to see a neurologist who cared and finally aged 63 found out what my disability is that I was born with on on medication that helps me. Plus when I was 62 my GP sent me to see cardiologist and found out I was born with hole in the side of my heart and on medication which I should have been on for decades .

When my husband died my home became a house and I existed didn't have a life.

Moving gave me back a home and found me again and living the best life I can. I have joined various groups . Have holidays in GB by myself. Have no tolerance for bad behaviour. Have wonderful neighbours. I am fitter than I was at 50 and weeks fly by.

I still feel half is me is missing since my husband died 22years ago. But the rage and anger i feel over my fit healthy husband dieing from cancer i use in a positive way. My love and grief for him new dies. In fact the grief gets worse over the years. But because of him I am loving my life because I would let him down if I didn't.

My mom always said older never old.

Who wants to grow old gracefully we have all the tee shirts time to do exactly what we want I want. And if I shock anyone especially the young all the better. 🤣🤣🤣

Daddima

I think if we forget about the ‘ageing’ part, and accept the age we are, without stressing about trying to look younger, we will ‘age with dignity’.
If we saw more articles like ‘ Look Fabulous at Eighty’ rather that ‘Look Ten Years Younger’, we’d do better!

And the "keep young and beautiful!" ads are 99.99% aimed at women - so what's new?

And the guys? Apparently, we have to believe (ha!) that scruffy skinny legs poking out of creased cargo shorts, topped off by a beer gut and the George Michael unshaven look somehow displays "strength of character" and "masculinity".

Nope. Just can't be bothered.

Aveline

Whitewavemark2 I've never been dignified so I'm not starting now!

This

Love it!!

How fascinating Elrel.

In my late 70s I discovered that I was a performance poet. I took my very varied poems to many local open mics then, during Covid restrictions, enjoyed Zooming them all over the world. I have met many wonderful new friends in many countries, some in real life, most of them much less than half my age.
The poetry community has truly given me a new lease of life and connections with people at various stages of theirs and I am eternally grateful for their patience and encouragement. While I respect the words of my fellow poets I don’t think dignity has much relevance!

Mostly I try to ignore ageing although I have several ailments which are entirely down to age! However, when I retired I read somewhere that learning a musical instrument was good for the ageing mind so I bought a keyboard and picked up where I'd left off aged 11, at Grade 3. Several years later I'm on Grade 7 pieces. I don't know if it's helping my mind at all but my smugness has rocketed! 😂😂😂

⅕ ¼ ⅛ ⅛ ½
Just practising

Oh, that was supposed to be 1/6th 😁

I do eat cake - would that work too?

I ate cake today. ⅙ of my daily egg!

Witzend

My aim would be at all costs to avoid dementia*, so I won’t need ‘toileting’ as they like to call it, or to have my nappies changed.

*there’s no sure way, I know, but it’s in the news lately from some American study, that people who eat eggs regularly are less likely to develop it - because of some substance in eggs.

So no prizes for guessing what I had for breakfast, or rather brunch, just now…

Thanks for that Witsend! I’ve not eaten an egg since I was eleven!

They make me really poorly

I do eat cake - would that work too?

I have always eaten a healthy diet Eat well, not too much, most of it plants has been my guiding light. It has got me to 82, with no serious medical problems and still capable of painting and ecorating gardening and going for good long walks. Genetics helped a bit as well.

I have never jumped on bandwagons, in fact I usually choose to jump off them when they start rolling. There is always someone somewhere telling me that if I eat less of this or more of that it may bring all the plagues of Egypt upon me, but so far there is no sign of them and I have had a good long run without them.

We live in a world and at a time when the range of delicious and fascinating foods and cuisines available to us has never been wider, enjoy them all - in moderation.

My mum, who lived to 92, used to say “ You’re as old as you feel”. Admittedly some days she felt very old when her arthritis was bad, but her mind was young and active so she felt young.

I’ve just come home from choir with a friend my age. We were both talking about the singing holidays we are going on, great fun regardless of our age.

I can relate to being fed up with pills, scans and people mentioning your age! Enjoy your hobbies. I think of dignity as how you behave with other people. In which case, having been polite and courteous my whole life, I am not sure I can age with dignity. I am ageing with a fight and being grumpy and reacting to ageism and negative attitudes wherever I go! Nothing is good enough in the health service these days. Just look after yourself and pamper if you can. I would love some pampering.

It seems a strange thing to decide to do or not to. I haven't got time to think about how I age so just do what ever comes naturally.

Oreo

The latest thing is that eating more eggs will stave off dementia.

There are eggs in cake.

Just saying.

Witzend it’s not just dementia to avoid ‘nappy changing’ my friends just had a stroke and can’t speak coherently and is in nappies
Afraid I like my carbs hopefully that’s an old wives tale
I do daily soduku s when I can’t do it I ll get worried

If a such a privilege to get to our age - do what you can and what you want x

The latest thing is that eating more eggs will stave off dementia.

MargaretTay

I think carbohydrates are the devil. Lots of people I know who have dementia ate a high carb diet
I’ve no scientific proof of course

there is some truth in what you say MargaretTay, but onluy some truth. There is a higher risk of dememntia if you eat a lot of refined carbohydrates, white flour sugar etc and if more than 25% of you diet comes from UPF.

However a diet high in complex carbohydrates found in vegetables, fruit, and legumes are generally associated with a lower risk of cognitive decline.

Can you give us more information on the types of carbohydrates your friends were eating and for how long?

However this diet will only lead to an increase in risk, it doesn't make it certain and it has to be seen in the context of a lifetimes eating pattern.

A person in extreme old age, widowed and lonely, may develop a diet of easily eaten unchallenging food based on bread and sugary foods, but if they have eaten a well balanced diet for their first 80 years, the effect on cognition will be far less than if they have always lived on bread and potatoes with little fruit and veg.

The variables underneath your statement are so diverse and complex, I think you need to do a bit more research before making such sweeping statements.

MargaretTay

I think carbohydrates are the devil. Lots of people I know who have dementia ate a high carb diet
I’ve no scientific proof of course

Oh dear, I just ate a piece of birthday cake.

I’ve no scientific proof of course
So nothing to back up your beliefs.

Witzend

I've always enjoyed Crosswords and Codewords and subscribe to a couple of Take a Break magazines (my favourites being 'Take a Crossword' and 'CrissCross').

Concise crosswords only as my brain hasn't ever seem to sync with the Cryptics!

I have a book and pen everywhere - including the car and in the loo!!

My hubby also prints out the daily ones from our Times subscription and those available daily from the Guardian and Mail. I don't like doing them online on my ipad as it's too easy to get frustrated and click on the letter or word answer. By printing them off I really have to THINK!

My children know that the minute I'm struggling with the Times crossword that's the time to book me into Dignitas.
.

I think carbohydrates are the devil. Lots of people I know who have dementia ate a high carb diet
I’ve no scientific proof of course

Lupatria

dignity - don't know the meaning of the word!
my body might say at 78 (almost 79) that i'm getting older but i refuse to admit it.
so I will have to be dragged kicking and screaming with no dignity whatsoever into old age!

How does that manifest itself please? Genuinely interested.

WithNobsOnIt

I was hoping for a Sex and Drugs and Rock.and Roll.retitement.

But this has been curtailed by lack of suitable men , limited income and arthritis.

But l am still.rnjoying life as much as l can doing things that give me pleasure or are entertaining.

Happy Retirement

🎆

No Nobs on it after all then?