Behaviour in the Doctor's Waiting Room

Your assumption was that the voice of a doctor with Asian ethnicity would be hard to understand. It’s an outdated and offensive attitude.

Can you understand journalists Mishal Husain, Krishnan Guru-Murthy, Naga Munchetty, Reeta Chakrabarti, Samira Ahmed or Krishnan Guru-Murthy?

How about actors Dev Patel, Parminder Nagra, Archie Panjabi, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Meera Syal, Jimi Mistry, Nitin Ganatra?

I experience this micro-aggression on a regular and tedious basis. I speak clear RP.

My doctors waiting room is always empty.

Not entirely clear what they actually do really.

PaynesGrey

Your assumption was that the voice of a doctor with Asian ethnicity would be hard to understand. It’s an outdated and offensive attitude.

Can you understand journalists Mishal Husain, Krishnan Guru-Murthy, Naga Munchetty, Reeta Chakrabarti, Samira Ahmed or Krishnan Guru-Murthy?

How about actors Dev Patel, Parminder Nagra, Archie Panjabi, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Meera Syal, Jimi Mistry, Nitin Ganatra?

I experience this micro-aggression on a regular and tedious basis. I speak clear RP.

I have to be honest and say that the person I spoke to on the phone yesterday to make an appointment did have Asian ethnicity and I did struggle to understand them and I like to think that I’m not racist in any way. One of the reasons why I retired from the NHS was that I was struggling to understand people on the phone if there was any background noise.

I think your son was trying to shush you in case you said anything else and it sounds like your voice is louder than you think . GPs waiting rooms tend to be fairly quiet, so voices carry .
I’m on your son’s side as I’m the daughter with a deaf mother , who takes her to all her appointments. And yes she sometimes comments on a clinicians name if it sounds foreign. And yes I do a lot of shushing . 9 times out of 10 the clinician has perfect English . I find that some older people forget that the clinician with a foreign name is often born and educated in the UK.
I work in dentistry and often older white patients say to me , where are all the English dentists ? My reply is they’re all English , born here .

petra

caleo
Did you actually say im glad you’re here because the doctor has a foreign name if that’s a yes? there are lots of people around now who would interpret that as a racist remark as in ooh, is a foreigner, I don’t want to be on my own with him
I know this sounds ludicrous, which it is but this is the world we are living in.
It’s the equivalent of Reds under the beds in the USA in the 50s.
I take some neighbours to a gentle keep fit class.
One of them is the kindest person you could meet but she used the word darky to describe an African gentleman in the class.
Fortunately this was after we had left.
If the thought police had heard her I dread to think what they would have made of it.

100% right Petra.

I am attending an NHS physio class run by a young woman whose speech is at times difficult to understand. Not so much when she gives short, clear instructions, but when explaining things she speaks more quickly and less distinctly. Yes, she does have a ‘ foreign’ accent. I have no idea what it is and it doesn’t matter. How else can I put it, and not cause offence? I could probably say the same thing about various UK regional accents.

PaynesGrey

Your assumption was that the voice of a doctor with Asian ethnicity would be hard to understand. It’s an outdated and offensive attitude.

Can you understand journalists Mishal Husain, Krishnan Guru-Murthy, Naga Munchetty, Reeta Chakrabarti, Samira Ahmed or Krishnan Guru-Murthy?

How about actors Dev Patel, Parminder Nagra, Archie Panjabi, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Meera Syal, Jimi Mistry, Nitin Ganatra?

I experience this micro-aggression on a regular and tedious basis. I speak clear RP.

"I experience this micro-aggression on a regular and tedious basis. I speak clear RP." says PaynesGrey. Since your use of English includes RP the micro aggression you experience is not due to your RP that's to say it is not due to your accent.

I object to your accusing me of "micro-aggression" . You have never even met me. I demand that you apologise.

Tenko

I think your son was trying to shush you in case you said anything else and it sounds like your voice is louder than you think . GPs waiting rooms tend to be fairly quiet, so voices carry .
I’m on your son’s side as I’m the daughter with a deaf mother , who takes her to all her appointments. And yes she sometimes comments on a clinicians name if it sounds foreign. And yes I do a lot of shushing . 9 times out of 10 the clinician has perfect English . I find that some older people forget that the clinician with a foreign name is often born and educated in the UK.
I work in dentistry and often older white patients say to me , where are all the English dentists ? My reply is they’re all English , born here .

Tenko, you say " I am on your son's side" .I do not seek moral support . This is not about taking sides. It is about seeking advice and if possible an interest in the sociology of chatting behaviours in public enclosed spaces.

I remember being on a ward round and one elderly patient said to an Asian doctor "and where were you born?"
Dr replied ' Barnet General' and we all laughed.
I find a strong Scottish accent difficult but these days its mainly because my hearing is not so good.
I don't panic though just say I am quite deaf now so you need to speak clearly.

Caleo

Personally speaking, a Scottish name would be reassuring for me as I am a Scot and am happy with all Scottish accents and even all Scottish dialects.

Many GPs are 'Asian' and some Asians are hard for me to hear. I do not doubt their competence and their kindness but I do not enjoy some foreign accents. My preference is not racist.

I'm not good with some Scottish accents. Some, not all.
Today I've had lunch with a Scottish friend and, over the years I have become accustomed to her and can understand what she says but found it difficult when I first met her.

Some UK regional accents are not easy to follow either.

Caleo , maybe speak to your son . Although you’ve been given plenty of advice on here .

Given the context, I thought this article may be of interest..... or food for thought at least.....
www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2025/jul/09/new-rules-small-talk-nail-every-conversation-first-dates-weddings-parties-funerals

Tenko you say " I am on your son's side" .I do not seek moral support . This is not about taking sides. It is about seeking advice and if possible an interest in the sociology of chatting behaviours in public enclosed spaces

Not the impression your opening post gives., OP.
What “advice” did you hope to get? Other than that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover or a professional by a (possibly) foreign sounding name
“The sociology of chatting in public spaces” - really?
How about the wisdom or even good manners of making an audible potentially inflammatory comment or judgement ?
You clearly gave the impression that your S was out of order by the way you described his attempt to shush you.
He did not say “Shut up” though, did he?
But he did stop you from making a fool of yourself.
Did you hope for justification?
Likewise al the posts decrying “foreign” (sounding) health professionals.
Not in my name.

Rosie, sincerely I was actually puzzled. I am clearer in my mind now.

I did not enjoy the moral condemnation from some posters, and I did not deserve it.

I don't think it was a case of moral condemnation, more that posters were simply pointing how your remark might have been perceived by others in the waiting room, and how that was probably why your son reacted in the way he did.

I think the younger generation are very aware of perceived racism, my daughters always correct me if I say anything that could be thought of as racist, usually inocently. Also, older people do tend to speak loudly, my great aunt, in a restaurant, tended to remark on the other diners in a very loud voice, which was extremely embarrassing.

Felix2007

I think the younger generation are very aware of perceived racism, my daughters always correct me if I say anything that could be thought of as racist, usually inocently. Also, older people do tend to speak loudly, my great aunt, in a restaurant, tended to remark on the other diners in a very loud voice, which was extremely embarrassing.

That sounds rather ageist.

We were out to lunch with friends the other day. There were two other groups there, all 30 or 40 somethings, both groups very loud so that we could hardly hear ourselves.

Perhaps older people might speak loudly because they are deaf?

I went to our surgery recently and it was quite full of people but not a voice to be heard!!!!! Rather unusual? I rarely go there but I was surprised. Perhaps someone had been naughty?

He just didn't want to be the Caberet. Mum in law, in her care home was very vocal, opinionated and funny.
After one particularly pithy comment, the whole room burst out laughing.
I hadn't realised that ours was the only conversation.

I did realise it, Maremia.

I sought sociological ideas not personal comments. I know better now than to repeat any similar experiment at Gransnet. Petra 's is the most sociologically -able response so far.

Caleo
Thank you. 😉

If you're very deaf do you talk very loudly? People who aren't feeling well might not want to hear you, just as an example I suffer from migraines and loud voices hurt. Maybe your son is being considerate.

petra

Caleo
Thank you. 😉

Perhaps you'd like to give the rest of us some tips on how to post acceptable replies petra

Our surgery waiting room is another empty one. My daughter in multi-cultural London complained of the patients in hers who bring along their entire family and takeaway food. It was the same when she had her baby and couldn’t sleep for the large number of visitors who stayed half of the night.
Is it racist to comment on different peoples’ behaviour? How about saying Mrs Next-Door wears too much make-up or I can’t understand Geordie accents?

How do you feel about it now, Caleo?
GN is rarely a linear discussion. Without actually hearing the tone of your voice, or any of the responses, we have to rely on just the black and white words.
Don't think anyone meant to offend, but, I do not speak for all.