Would you allow a neighbour to use your shower?

Surely they could manage for two weeks without a shower. Have we become too concerned with cleanliness? Does this post show an age divide? To some maybe a shower a day is an essential necessity but older people who remember pre shower times when it was a bath once a week May think not.

I would probably agree. I would expect them to bring their own towels, soap/shower gel etc. though.

However, if I was the one without a shower, I am with Bluebelle. I wouldn't even ask my neighbours if I could use theirs, though I am sure they would let me. I would have a strip wash at the sink and, if necessary, wash my hair over the sink - like I did in the olden days .

Simple I would offer.
I on the other hand wouldn’t ask.

I would certainly help neighbours if they needed it..

Yes, of course, and I hope I’d think to offer if they didn’t ask. We’ve only one bathroom, but it would surely put it out of action for 10 minutes tops.

We know nearly all our neighbours and we look out for one another. Our toilet was frozen for more than a week one Christmas and we had six visitors staying over on Christmas Eve. Fortunately our next door neighbour was away, but she let us have her key without a second thought.

I only have one bathroom but would happily acquiesce if a neighbour asked. My neighbours are lovely people and very obliging so I would be happy to help

I would hate that, and would certainly never ask it of a neighbour, unless we were very close friends.

On several occasions in recent years we have been without any hot running water whatsoever for a few weeks, and have coped OK.

It's not like there are no alternatives to showering - a good strip wash is fine, and as long as she is still able to bend, it's not that hard to wash one's hair over the basin either. That's how most people did it anyway when I was a child.

But she has asked, and put you in a really awkward position ...

No, I wouldn't like that and certainly not every other day. When I moved in to my current flat I had no hot water for 2 weeks so we boiled kettles and had strip down washes at the sink. Admittedly I didn't know my neighbours at that stage but quite frankly even if I did, it wouldn't even enter my head to ask to use their shower.

Just to say that I have offered all sorts of help to my neighbours over the years and vice versa but this (for me personally) wouldn't sit well. It also wouldn't work logistically due to my strange working hours.

We have used a neighbours shower, as well as their kitchen when we had work done. We only did it for a few days though and thanked them with flowers and a voucher for a meal at a local restaurant.
So of course we would let a neighbour use our shower, we know most of them quite well, but would understand if we didn’t know our neighbours not wanting to do this.

Absolutely! We too have 3 showers and I would be happy for a neighbour to use one. We are a close community where I live despite there being quite a few houses and we all help each other out.

We have been without hot running water for over a fortnight after a leak in (a fairly new) hot water tank in the loft. For a few days we didn’t have any water apart from the filter drinking water. I wouldn’t want to ask neighbours to use their facilities although I imagine they would say yes. Most days I shower at the local sports centre, usually after a class so we’re getting by.
Hopefully a new tank will be fitted next week, whilst I’m away staying with my daughter!

I know a lot of people would not like to ask so as soon as I heard that their shower was not working I would offer to come and use mine.

Wondering if peoples attitudes vary according to where they live in the country too? eg back in my home city = I would have just headed for a spa/swimming pool or something (in line with my attitude there of "There's no such thing as an emergency - one just goes out to find whatever-it-is") - but in a remoter area one needs more to have the attitude of "help out/be helped out".

Hence I said nowt, but felt upset when I didnt get offered use of a shower when I needed it by my immediate neighbour. Though my own attitude now that I'm here is "This is a remote area - ie West Wales" and so there's many fewer facilities here (ie one can't just "go out and get it - re whatever is missing"). So my own take on "helping out with favours" these days even includes that, as long as I've met them in person and think they're okay, then someone can sleep on my sofabed for a night if their car lets them down and knowing, as I do, that public transport is awful here (ie it's bad at any time - but pretty much non-existent of an evening).

That's even included letting a guy I'd only met the once invite himself to stay the night on my sofabed (as he lives in North Wales) and he's come back and done so a second night on there for something else he was going to.

So - yep...."casual favours" is more necessary if one is somewhere remote and/or (as in this woman's case) she doesnt have someone "closer" to her that she can ask.

I would help a neighbour in any circumstances. We never know when any of us might need help. It truly amazes me as to why some people are so territorial and precious about their living spaces.
Our next-door neighbour gave up his car earlier this year - both he and his wife loved to go out but his health was declining and he, very sensibly, decided to stop driving. They do have family living quite close by but they also know they only have to ask and we will help out - and we have done so several times.
We don't see this as an imposition, we genuinely want to help them.
What goes round, comes round.

I know my neighbours, our house has 2 bathrooms, I would allocate one for their use until the shower was sorted.

However as all our neighbours houses have 2 bathrooms, I cannot see the situation arising.

David49

As long as they were good neighbours it would be OK for 2 weeks, I actually have 5 neighbours all are good, so I hope they dont all have shower failure at the same time.

I would definitely allow.
As long as the neighbour doesnt have a bad reputation for something or other.

This has happened to one of my kids and her DH.

Used the shower of a neighbour, who they knew a bit.
My son in law would not dream of turning up at work unshowered.

As long as they were good neighbours it would be OK for 2 weeks, I actually have 5 neighbours all are good, so I hope they dont all have shower failure at the same time.

All else being equal = I think it's fair enough to provide shower facilities temporarily if need be.

One of the first reasons I realised it wasn't going to work out with my current neighbours was that (in the course of having my house renovated) I was hoping/sorta expecting a neighbour to offer use of their shower whilst the (one and only) bathroom was being gutted. It was only 5 days in total that the problem was there - so not very long at that. But there was no offer whatsoever of using either shower or loo whilst my bathroom was being gutted and re-done.

I didn't feel it appropriate to ask - but had thought/hoped I'd get an offer (as that's what I would have done myself) - but nope. So I just figured that 5 days wasn't that long to simply not shower at all and manage as best I could for the use of a loo and at least be glad that being in my 60's meant I could manage better without a loo than when I'd been a younger/still having periods agegroup. So yep....I used a bucket if need be in some room that hadn't yet been gutted and followed by being glad of a readily accessible outside drain for disposal purposes.

Not being offered "use of facilities" was one of the first clues my neighbours had no intention of being friendly with me (as I'd been hoping for - and I would have been fine with things like taking in parcels/feeding a pet cat if they went away/etc and had rather expected that sort of 'casual favours' sort of relationship). The only offer I got from the next door neighbour was being asked in for a drink/nibbles when it was Christmas not that long after I'd moved in - so I thought "Ah here we go - a bit of a welcome" and in I went - only to find the purpose of this was to make it very plain to me that I should do as she wanted and my life would be made uncomfortable if I didn't do so!!!! (which she then proceeded to do when it was clear that I was going to live like a "normal householder", ie with reasonable consideration, but was shocked/surprised at the idea even being mooted of being ordered around by a neighbour....).

I’ve been in this very position recently as was having a new bathroom put in. My neighbours have been lovely and let me use their showers. I do know them well though.
We have a street WhatsApp group and a neighbour I don’t know asked if they could use someone’s shower as theirs was broken. I offered and was proud to show off my lovely new bathtoom (I just have the one.)
A shower takes 5 minutes so it really isn’t a big deal. I like being of use to others and it’s been lovely to see how my neighbours stepped in for me.

It would be a yes from me too.
As I’m usually out most mornings, I’d probably give my neighbour a spare key to let themselves in, etc. should that be more convenient for them.
Otherwise, I’d be happy to set an evening routine.

It’s a good job we are all different BL - but your lifesttyle obviously suits you.

Yes. We are in the lucky position of having three showers, one hardly ever used. Even if I didn’t know the person too well they would be welcome to use that one.. Would think twice though if it were my personal shower.

In the circumstances described yes definitely, in fact we’ve done it and had it reciprocated.

I wouldn’t hesitate in agreeing in those circumstances. It would need to be a time agreed in advance though, not random times or in the evening.

A few years ago, my neighbour who keeps an eye on my flat, had problems with her shower while she had a friend staying with her. She asked by text if they could use mine so it was easy for me to agree.

A few years later, the same neighbour was without a dining table over Christmas so, as we would be away, I offered her the use of mine, mainly so that they weren’t eating Christmas dinner on their laps! A very acceptable bottle of wine awaited our return.

On both occasions, I would have agreed without hesitation even if we had been at home.