The 'famous' bed side manner, NOT!

Everdene, I agree with you. It is a matter of just manners. He should have used your name. Lady is the polite term, not Woman.

My gp, who I went to yesterday, calls me "luv" and "darling".

My friend came with me and was outraged, but it was only when she pointed it out that I gave it a thought, really.

The problem is, that like it or not, the word 'ladies' can be used to patronise women. It lies in the tone of voice and inflection.

I think it is best avoided.

Someone I know asked me to explain her doctors letter, and it said "this retarded woman".

Correct terminology, perfectly descriptive, but how unpleasant.

MissAdventure

It is, I think.
Probably because it's a nice was of saying "I saw this moaning old bat"

My thoughts exactly, I've long thought that medics have their own special terminology for patients. "The pleasant lady" ones have often given me afterthoughts!!! 🤔
What could they possibly mean? I think I can guess.😶

I think someone on here who worked "in the field" said it meant that the patient was unlikely to be difficult.

As a fellow 'pleasant' lady (is that different from a pleasant woman? ) I understand that it means 'not difficult' - ie not likely to attack the doctor or refuse to engage with treatment.

I did once find a list of (probably spoof) abbreviations supposedly used by doctors before we got access to notes. Ones that stick in my mind are FLK (funny looking kid) and BAB (bolshy and boring) .

It was very funny, although I didn't believe them - I'm sure we've all heard NFX (normal for Xtown), which is so far from being medically useful, and so apparently widespread that it can't be true. You could imagine the Martin Clunes doctor using them though.

Snap, MissA. I was answering the door and cross-posted.

I love it when I'm out with my sisters for lunch and we are called ladies. I can't imagine someone saying 'Can I help you women?'

At my recent eye procedure the nurse called me a him twice to the consultant and he did correct her saying my patient is a female do you not differentiate gender in your country. She was from the Philippines I think. I was also put out that the consultant introduced himself by his Christian name!!

I hate being addressed are you guys ready to order to, much prefer are you ladies ready - would not like being addressed are you women ready ……

If the OP read ‘woman’ in a copy letter to her GP I think that’s perfectly acceptable in a medical situation. It’s not insensitive.

Men don't get called 'gents' or 'men' do they? I don't think so anyway.

What's wrong with 'Can I help you?'

I'm not too bothered either way, although I hate 'girls', but prefer not to be called by my first name in a professional context.

What I really dislike is the use of 'female' as a noun. It's not. I think police use it along with 'male' as a descriptor in reports, but when used outside of that context it is disparaging.

Great contributions! Thank you for your anecdotes.

In a hospital letter they would (and do).
“I saw this 59 year old man/woman in my clinic today” is usual.

I really dislike being asked “Are you ladies ready to order?” It usually comes across as very patronising. What’s wrong with just saying, “Are you ready to order?” ?

I've only noticed this as I’ve got older ( I’m in my late sixties now). I don’t recall anyone ever asking in this way when I was out for a meal with female work colleagues.

This topic are well appropriate: a recent hop problem: a hospital doctor asked me for my pronouns........what the Dickens.......?

I will of course say nothing as he was very accurate in his treatment, which could not be faulted.

Surely that is what counts, and what you paid for?
You seriously wouldn't even contemplate making a complaint because he referred to you, accurately I presume, as a woman?

I think that there is rarely any malice in what people who basically don't know you at all, use as aform of address.
I don't mind being called "ladies" or "you guys". With the former people , often men, are usually trying to be polite or even chivalrous.
I have a terrible habit when talking about younger people of saying "that boy" or "that young girl" or "that little girl" ; I suppose I am acknowledging or flattering their youth?
Talking* to* someone is different . If I were addressing people I didn't know I would probably say"ladies" or "gents".
I'll tell you what is annoying, why do Continental men always know the minute you hit 30 , so that they swap "mademoiselle" and "senorina" for "madame" and ""senora".
😡😡.
I'm a bit older than 30 now !!

At least he recognised you as female unlike our PM who has a slight problem differentiating between M & F.
Down ‘ere in Devon I am often referred to as ‘my lover’ which can be somewhat disconcerting when uttered by a 30 something in my local fish shop. If only 🤣

I have yet to meet a doctor/consultant who wasn’t abrupt recently, maybe I am just unlucky but they tend to treat me like a silly old trout. But that aside doesn’t bother me whether I am called a lady or a woman, though I think is much nicer if someone actually bothers to call me by my name.
However, like another poster I hate being referred to when out for lunch with my girlfriends as ‘you guys’.

When I was a mature student and looking for a job to boost my income I had an interview for a shop. It was two middle aged guys, one of whom said "We were thinking of getting a girl to ..." "Without even thinking I said "Im not a girl, Im a woman" and I think that cost me the job. It was also a red flag as to their attitude. I was probably far better educated than both of them put together.

My grandmother used to say that a woman is a lady in whose presence a man becomes a gentleman.

And they probably knew more about running a shop and what makes a good shop assistant than you did.

Brandy Gran, I think they probably meant: you were a pleasant lady. No code required!

Calling women ladies always makes me think of an older chap in a blazer addressing a group of women with something like “how are we ladies”? So patronising. I’d rather be “guys” any day.

I prefer to be addressed by my name, or in the context of medical referrals as this ……woman (preceded by my age). Whether the person is described as “pleasant” or “unpleasant” is irrelevant.
The term ladies is a left over from a bygone era and is generally used for older women.