Stingy People

I may have told this before on another thread. Friend took ill on the way home so we missed our connecting flight to Belfast.Spent night in hospital then had. to get taxi to Heathrow next day. When we got home I asked for £30 for the taxi. She refused saying her holiday was paid all in before we left so she owed nothing!

I don't mind sitting the bill if all involved are eating and drinking similar food etc, but I will, and do, disagree when the 'hogs get their noses deep in the trough' thinking the bill will be shared, then I stand my ground and just pay for what I have consumed! To me it is a form of cheating or even stealing to expect someone else to pay for your choices.

Some years ago, I went with my mother to a restaurant to have lunch with mum's stepmother and sister, with whom she didn't get on too well. Both were known for being rich and mean.
When the bill came, they started arguing quite loudly about what was on the bill and who should pay it.
Guess who did pay the bill!

In the past used to go out with a large group of friends, one friend who was watching the pennies would get up and say I will go and pay for what I’ve had and then leave. This to me was fine as she didn’t have a lot of money, and didn’t drink,

I was in dire straights at a time with money. I was asked to go to a friend's birthday meal with lots of people I knew. I chose the cheapest meal, no starter, no drinks, no pudding. Nearing the end it was split the bill, equally by everyone. I couldn't do it, I didn't have enough. I quietly put my share to the next pound under my plate edge and left without saying goodbye. I was so embarrassed. Id really looked forward to this night out to cheer me up. Turned out the opposite. I wasn't being stingy

grandMattie

As a poor young married, I went out to dinner with the wives of DH’s colleagues. I picked modestly priced main and pudding and only drank water (which is what I could afford). The wife of one of the managers had three courses including lobster, and had quite a lot to drink. To my horror, the bill was then divided equally! I had to pay so much more than I could afford. I never went out with them again.
Since then, I have made sure that the bill is paid according to what you have consumed yourself.

I had a very similar experience in my student days.

Since then, I always when asked out, or asking others out, discuss who is paying, and I have always refused to divide the entire bill by the number of diners, as I have no wish to dictate that others stick to the cheapest items on the menu, nor to pay a greater amount than I can afford.

I had a friend (past tense!) that I used to frequently go on holiday with. She said to me one day after a meal in a restaurant, "you seem to tip everybody" to which I replied " yes, because you don't seem to tip anybody". She was so mean and had SO much money. She complained to me one day that her 'boyfriend' wasn't leaving her anything in his will !! He had family members of his own. As did she. So I asked her " Are you leaving him anything in your will then?" And she replied that she wasn't but fully expected him to cater for her. Beggars belief. Needless to say, we are no longer 'friends'.

I remember being annoyed after a bossy woman who had joined our group arranged a lunch at the Chinese. She said it was a special 2 course for £10 which seemed good value so my friend and I chose from the menu and only drank water.However some in the group ordered from the main menu and had drinks and pudding. More fool us as of course the bossy one decided we should add a tip and then split the bill!

I had a friend who suggested whenever we went for a meal that we would take it in turns to pay, something I was happy to go along with - then on several occasions when it was her turn to pay she would "discover" she had left her purse and cards at home - so I would have to pay - this happened so often that I finally got fed up, told her I wouldn't let her take advantage of me anymore and I no longer see her

Another time I had a friend and her boyfriend stay with us for a couple of weeks. On the final night she insisted on taking us out for a meal - she chose the restaurant. When we got there she looked at the menu said very loudly "I'm not paying those prices". My husband ended up paying for the 4 of us (her boyfriend didn't say a word and as far as I recall never paid for anything!)

When I was much younger and naive I befriended a young woman who came from a well to do background, she had absolutely no concept of money. On a couple of occasions she passed on designer clothes and a bag to me, I was thrilled. But going out was a nightmare, quite often she would insist upon us eating in an expensive restaurant then at the end of meal remark casually that she hadn’t brought her cards so could I get it this time, or she would leap out of a taxi leaving me to pay the fare.
She had no idea. Thankfully she left the country to live with her mother when she finished uni and though we communicated for a while our friendship soon fizzled out.

I once met a friend for coffee, waited until she'd ordered as I couldn't afford much, then said, "I'll pay," upon which she said ,"Oh, if your paying I'll have....," a more expensive item. Never again.

Correction - forgotten her purse not cards.

Babs03, are you sure that your one-time friend had no idea . . .
sounds quite deliberate to me.

@wellbeck, like I say was naive. But I do think that people who don’t have to worry about money quite often don’t realise how difficult it is for others. And I think this goes for anyone who tends to eat out with others, be aware of the menu prices, can everyone dining with you afford the prices on the menu? Maybe read the room and book a more middle of the road affordable venue if you think somebody might feel awkward.

You dont HAVE to split the bill if you are on a budget (or diet) and only eat and drink modestly. What you do is announce at the beginning of the meal that you will be asking for a separate bill. Then everyone will know the situation if they choose to indulge in lobster while you have salad. Or if the separate bill does not materialise you leave the amount to cover what you have paid for and exit the restaurant. Let the rest of the party argue about the bill.

When out with my walking group, or with friends, we always say when ordering that we will be paying individually. Never had a problem with this, as pubs and restaurants never seem to mind.

I used to eat out regularly with a group of friends. We began to notice that one of the group always picked the most expensive things on the menu and also ordered extra drinks on top of our shared wine (she didn’t drive). We started to think she was using us as a meal ticket so, before we ordered one night, we said that we would have separate bills. Guess what! She ordered much cheaper food and no extra drinks.

After joining a local church my husband and son, a 17 year old newly appointed apprentice were invited to join the men’s group for curry night. They arrived and sat in the last 2 remaining seats on a table on a table for 4 and ordered what they could afford. One of the guys ordered a ton of food, sides, mains, alcohol and at the end of the night and after having left a lot of what he’d ordered announced “we’ll split the bill” chucked down £10 and left! My husband was furious that this Christian guy so blatantly took the piss and others had to pay for his gluttony. My husband has never been to another meal out with them and my son is now an atheist. A few lessons learned from that an we are not stingy!

When me and friends go out for meals there’s four of us two of us non drinkers the other two are big drinkers. We all pay for what we have not a big deal certainly nothing to do with being stingy I can’t stand stingy people.

LOL there is two sides to this….
The eater of all courses and the drinkers always want to split the bill. That’s totally unacceptable. Of course that’s what they want. They expect others to pay for them.
If I can’t afford or don’t want a course or expensive drink I state when ordering that I would like a separate bill. Saves a lot of embarrassment.

I like a drink with my meal and may have several but I would NEVER expect someone who doesn’t drink to pay the same as it …Rather selfish I feel 🙂

*as Me

Another curry night tale hownowbrowncow. We won’t be forgetting ours either. (posted earlier).
I never did like curry,

silverlining48

Years ago we went out for a curry with a couple we knew a bit, ( dds newish in laws) and were unexpectedly joined by about 10 of their friends none of whom we knew.

I had been ill so only had plain rice, dh had a bog standard curry. Neither of us drank anything other than tap water as we had a long motorway drive back. The rest of the group lived it up ordering masses of food, plenty of beer and wine was flowing. More turned up…hungry for curry etc. I just wanted to go home….

When the meal and jollities ended, bill was divided, our share was £80. We or rather Mr S didn’t like to make a fuss so we paid up. Our bill would have been about £10. Long time now but this thread has reminded me.

They walk among us silverlining48, I wonder if your greedy guts and ours are related 😂

I'm fairly happy to split the bill in most situations.
However, I will add that in every group I have eaten with, some over many years, no -one takes note that I don't eat meat ( veggie pasta is often the cheapest item on the menu) and usually order a small glass of wine ( I'm a total lightweight- two glasses and I'm on the table singing songs- from -the -shows)
I think that I am probably in credit for a year of free meals...