2.30am,and the phone rings...

Until two years ago I was leading a local homeless charity and used to receive middle of the night calls from the police or ambulance service asking for my help with particularly difficult or vulnerable clients. Occasionally I’d get a call (especially in severely cold weather) from a member of the public who’d seen someone sleeping rough and was worried.

Other late night calls have always been family emergencies; a death, an assault, a hospital admission etc. Hearing my phone after 11pm always sets my heart racing.

welbeck

could you get a lodger/carer for him, for the night cover.

I would have to be convinced that a lodger would volunteer for perpetually disturbed nights, but the care company do night calls so I'm investigating the option.

could you get a lodger/carer for him, for the night cover.

Roughly 5 out of every 7 nights I or my son get a call in the early hours. Ever since my 88 year old dad's memory gave up and he stopped sleeping. His carers put him in bed but he gets up and after a couple of hours feels lonely and forgets it's nighttime. He wonders where his carers are, so presses his panic alarm. They ring us to check him. (We have a video link so check he's okay), or if we can't see him we get up put our coats on and drive through empty streets 10 mins to his house to reassure him.
Or if we can't go the alarm responders go.
Currently I'm in the process of putting night calls into the already horrifically expensive care package ( 4 carers call each day already) to try and keep him in his home a while longer. But, I must admit the broken nights along with a f/t job are brutal.
In his more lucid moments he begs to stay at home.
It's also the thought of having to sell his and my late mum's home to pay the care home fees that drives me to keep him in his hom
My late mum really wanted to leave it to her grandchildren and the care fees will swallow it up so quickly.

biglouis I can assure you, my parents had done nothing to annoy anyone. As I said, in the end they just left the telephone off the hook at night.

biglouis

There is a phone in my office next door (in case I need to call) but the ringer it turned off.

but what if you were suddenly dizzy, or couldn't rise from your bed.
risk analysis takes into account likelihood (low), but also consequences (poss great).

We used to get calls for a Coop shop 50 miles away which had the same number but a different code. Persuading callers that ours was a private number and no, I wasn’t a Coop employee became very tedious. Eventually I contacted their head office who managed to deal with the problem. Phew. The only nocturnal call was from my Aunts’s nursing home to tell me she had died. My cousin gave them my number as she didn’t want to be disturbed in the night - thanks a bundle cousin! 🤣

There is a phone in my office next door (in case I need to call) but the ringer it turned off.

If you are elderly and live alone, I think it makes sense to have a phone to hand in the bedroom. If I became unwell, I like to think I have that access.

It turned out that it was someone's office fax machine sending faxs overnight. For some reason BT could do nothing about it

Some years ago I had a job in a call center and a man was absolutely vile to me. He could have simply hung up or said he was not interested but he said filthy sexist things to me. I set the fax modem on my computer to call him every hour on the hour for the next 48 hours.

Never annoy people who have your phone number.

I dont take a phone into the bedroom unless I am expecting a very urgent call. As I run an international business I dont want customers calling from remote parts of the world. There is nothig so urgent it cant wait until next day.

We no longer have a phone in the bedroom, not even mobiles.

Several times when the children were young, the phone rang I answered it and woke to find myself deep in conversation with someone about something, but no idea what or who, once it was some one from Canada following up a job application DH had made, once it was a cousin offering us a chance to holiday in their house in theirnabsence.

My parents used to get strange midnight calls. It turned out that it was someone's office fax machine sending faxs overnight. For some reason BT could do nothing about it (this was 40 years ago) so in the end they would take the phone off the hook when they went to bed and put it back on in the morning. After a couple of years it stopped.

This has happened to me in the past with genuine calls. I am much more wary these days. It seems to me that night calls could leave one wide open to scams. I have asked my family to come up with a word that tells me the call for money /help etc is genuine. Once during the day my grandson asked for financial help . I emailed him and asked questions only someone genuine would understand and be able to answer before I did help him out. (The genuine calls were from a friend who, unknown to us, was succumbing to dementia. Oddly they all happened around 2.a.m)

I take my phone to bed as I live alone,should I need help the phone is next to me,but as I said upthread both my son and my grandaughter are night workers.
I have bought my grandaughter up since the age of 4 after my daughter died,so its natural for my grandaughter to call me,she has no one else.
Buttonjugs yes the phone had switched itself off,the irony was I was a wreck all day after being woken up,and then a few hours later again when she rang to say all was well

My ex husband used to work for one of the utilities and frequently had to be called out through the early hours.

Many times I would be called to collect my stranded teenagers and their friends.

I get one of these early morning calls every few weeks from my 27yr old son, but I really don't mind.
He works 200 miles away from me, lives alone, and I do worry about him being so far away from home and his friends.
He's usually been out with work colleagues and is on his way back to where he lives, but he knows that I'm always awake all night, plus he's usually told me that he'd be going out, so he calls me on his way back to the house (slightly tiddly), telling me about his night out, until he gets safely back into the house.
I see these calls as his way of making sure I know that he's walking along dark streets on the outskirts of the city centre, so that (heaven forbid) if anything were to happen to him, I'd be able to contact the police/ ambulance etc (even from here), plus it means that I know he's made it back to the house safely.
I'm really glad that he wants to let me know that he's on his way back to the house, and that he's safe, regardless of the time of night. Many of our kids wouldn't bother telling us about their lives.

I used to do on call 24/7 nowadays if I get a late night phonecall someone better be dead or the caller will be

Why don’t you block the number?

yes, often, same man, another country, missing me..heavy sigh …

Quite a few times our phone has gone during the night, often family illness or death. Occasionally son or daughter couldn’t get taxis home from clubs etc or once daughters train cancelled.
But one time son went on holiday to Tenerife with his friend, they both got a bit drunk, son wanted to go back to hotel but his friend decided to stay in a club. Friend forgot our son had gone back to hotel and spent ages looking for him, he decided to ring us about 3 in the morning to tell us he was lost and not answering phone. We were on verge of contacting police before son answered his phone, furious at his friend.
Another time our son was on University placement in New York and he got lost, he decided to ring us for help, very late at night. We said get a yellow cab, he said no cars about. Then the phone went silent, after an hour of panicking he answered phone and told us he had found the underground station and lost signal. Kids,!!! But they know we/I would always help if they were in trouble.

Greciangirl

Why take a mobile phone to bed with you if you don’t need it for alarm.
Never take mine or iPad to bed.

Unfortunately, I do have a landline , but never get early morning calls.

I take mine to bed with me in case I am ill in the night. DH has his own room but I can ask Alexa to call him if he is needed and visa versa.

It wasn't a landline or mobile, but one night when I was at my friend''s flat - in the early hours of the morning the door buzzer from outside went off, I answered - a man wanting be let in, I told him no way and I would phone the police if he kept on - was told Madam I am the police needless to say when I checked he was so in he came - but not to the flat I was in.

Yes, they don't really see us, or our time as important. We have become doormats.

My ex boss used to ring me at about 1: 30 in the morning - and not speak. We knew it was her as she did it to the new boss who had been her deputy. BT were brilliant and , when I reported it, changed my number very quickly and put a message on the line threatening court action. The calls stopped. I hope a member of my family would ring me if they were panicked or upset. I.would feel the need to help whatever the circumstances or time of day/night.

For a period had many night-time calls demanding a mechanic or tow-truck because our number was one digit away from the 24-hour emergency garage number.
Also one digit different from the Intercontinental Hotel so had people ringing up to book a room or a table in the restaurant. Sometimes, when there had been too many calls, felt like accepting the 'booking' but never did - couldn't be that mean to someone who had mis-dialled the number!

Last night (actually 3a.m.) a phone call from one of my ex-students in India, asking me if I knew another ex-student , who had moved to the UK. 😫
Greciangirl I take the phone to bed, in case one of the children or GC ring.