nonsensical things people say

I so agree about "Have a nice day." When my DH died, not unexpectedly, I rang the GP practice to inform his GP (who, in common with most female GPs, works part-time and wasn't in that day). The receptionist said that the doctor would be in touch, and then she said "Have a nice day."
I'm afraid I yelled at her that this was actually the worst day of my life and would she and any other colleagues please think before mindlessly coming out with this formulaic and meaningless utterance.

When the recipient of a gift says "You didn't need to do that"
Instead of saying thank you!

Witzend along similar MN lines - to ‘tear someone a new one’.
Bleurgh. It’s so violent.

Whereas I quite like ‘to hand someone’s a*se to them on plate’.
That’s funny.

Language is a beautiful thing isn’t it

ParlorGames

"I just go with the flow"! No, you don't, you are just flakey, fickle, and unambitious!

"Only dead fish go with the flow."
Had that on my office wall.

‘It makes my teeth itch’ - often seen on MN. Whose teeth have ever itched?
Setting teeth ‘on edge’ is fairly common, but means something different from being very irritated.

Take your pullover off in the house or you'll not feel the benefit when you go out.

"My bad" drives me up the wall. I know what it means but actuaty makes no sense. Why not just say "my mistake"?????

And ’inside of’ ’of’ serves no purpose whatsoever

’Wait, what?’ American in origin I suspect, turns up in films tv (and the infamous Opra/Meghan interview)
Just say ’What’!

What a cynical lot we all are! My Mum was always coming up with one of her saying to suit the occasion. I guess these had come from her own mother. My Grandchildren say to me ‘Oh Nana - not one of your Mum’s sayings again!’. Her classic one was ‘Nothing lasts - good or bad’ and that is true!

Here goes - this may be a rant about this misuse of language but I just can't resist:
1 - (typically in a coffee shop or similar) "Can I get a ...." - Well no, I doubt it, it's not your coffee shop, try "please may I have"
2 - The misuse of the word "amount" - as in "there's a high amount of cows in that field" no, - think you'll find it's just a lot of cows.
3 - the stupid over frequent use of the words "awesome" and "amazing" until they just mean that something is well, normal.
Phew, got that off my chest!

The one that always gets me is 'see you later' when you now darn well that you are never going to see them again, ever !!

All of the above!
But just lately my dh has been in hospital and the drs would say Are you alright?
I used to think, course he is that’s why he’s in here! Didn’t say it though!

I'm sure he/ she'll be fine when someone is unwell. Not doctors and haven't a clue about the person's recovery or not. I find it really irritating.

I once sat in the waiting room of our Doctors and someone I knew sat next to me and asked " Ooo why are you here?' My answer "don't know but may do when I come out"

DaisyAlice

Cheer up. It might never happen. I once replied with It already has.

I hated people saying this when I was younger. I've just got a resting b*tch face, can't help it but was so incensed once that I actually told the person that my family had been killed in a car crash and that's why I looked miserable (awful I know, I was much younger)
Anyway it soon shut them up !

'See you later' - I first heard it in Australia in a shop - found it mystifying and I still do. All very well if it is a friend but a complete stranger who has just taken money for petrol!

‘Back to back’ a duel?

How about when you bump into a neighbour in the doctor's and they ask "Hello, are you alright?" - that happens around here, anyway

JackyB

^The one that really gets me is,
"We want for now't we've got", of course, you bl...don't.^

They are showing off in their own way saying that they have got everything they have ever needed or wanted.

I would take that to mean that anything they have, they don't have need of. It doesn't mean to say that they don't have need of anything else. Not showing off as such, but modestly saying that they don't need two of anything.

Have you ever heard it said ? Or the people who say it. They are usually puffed up with self-importance, trying to make others feel inadequate and small.

"See you in a bit" is one which annoys me. A bit of what? Hours, weeks? Tradespeople use it a lot when they are "just going to get a part". Another way of extending the working day which you have to pay them for.

AussieGran59

“How are we today?” Drives me crazy! I say, I’m fine, don’t know about you, though.

King Frederik IX of Denmark, who was not given to puffing off his state, is said to have replied to a nurse who asked him,

"Good morning, how are we today?"

"Good morning, I have no idea how you are, Nurse, but I am still, even although I probably am dying,the king of Denmark, and I woud like my breakfast now, if you please."

This strikes me as a very good answer to a fatuous question.

‘Pretty please’ makes me want to 🤮.
Ditto ‘peeps’. (instead of people).

I like "daft as a brush but not as useful".

It’s not annoying or anything like that but I have always wondered at the phrase, ‘as daft as a brush’, which I have used myself from time to time I have to admit.