Dog friendly? What would you do?

I don't want dogs anywhere near me. I am afraid of them but as I said, I wouldn't have left the OP out.

This reminds me of how one smoker in a group used to just assume that everyone else would be happy to eat in the smoking area of a restaurant.

I wouldn't be at all comfortable eating in a restaurant with strange dogs all around. Many people would feel the same. Presumably your friends did. I think they're getting very unfair criticism on here.

The assumption of a dog lover that they bet they enjoyed the company of the dogs. We don't all think alike.

57VRS

Very rude bunch of people. My dogs are everything. I’ll bet they enjoyed the company of your dog on the walk!!! I would definitely have gone home as you did! Well done!!!

I bet they didn’t?

Copper3

No question about it! A big fat 3!
Even if I didn't like dogs (I do and I have one), I would not have expected a member of the group to not be included in the meal. So would have happily comprised and sat in the dog-friendly section.

It’s not a compromise ?????

It’s a concession

Only one person would have got what she wanted.

And her compromise would have been?

Not everyone enjoys the company of dogs. I don't. My daughter likes dogs but suffers a severe allergy if she goes near one.

Very rude bunch of people. My dogs are everything. I’ll bet they enjoyed the company of your dog on the walk!!! I would definitely have gone home as you did! Well done!!!

No question about it! A big fat 3!
Even if I didn't like dogs (I do and I have one), I would not have expected a member of the group to not be included in the meal. So would have happily comprised and sat in the dog-friendly section.

I would have found out the lie of the land before setting out, ie how many would be taking dogs and what were the rules re dogs in the place chosen to eat, then planned accordingly. Not everyone is a dog lover and some people are allergic to them.

I think I would have gone home. Then cried ?

I agree with your POV, Lathyrus. The OP’s way is the ‘tyranny of one’ overruling everyone else.

Maybe my view is coloured by having had lunch last week in a restaurant that is divided into dog-free/dog-friendly, but no physical barrier We had to put up with someone’s pooch barking and whining all the way through our meal. The owner even got a waitress to hold the dog and mind her other, non-barking dog, while she disappeared off somewhere! That took a serve-person off doing her job and we had to wait ages for our food.

I like many dogs, have been a dog owner twice myself but they’re not more important than humans.

Find some doggy people to go walking with instead of this very selfish bunch who know that you bring the dog (who I am sure enjoyed every sniff of the walk) yet not one of them would keep you and your furry friend company, lots of cafes and restaurants have dog friendly areas and any real friends would have joined you and the dog.

IrishDancing

I think you’re pretty much in the minority Lathyrus (great username btw). I’m not a dog owner but I wouldn’t take a dog into a restaurant if I were. But that’s not the point here, the point is that it appears not to have been made clear to the OP what the restaurant’s dog-related policy was. If my friends walked away from me, when they could have compromised about where they ate, I’d be hurt too.

Thank you for being pleasant in your post ?

Actually if you read all of the thread (it’s got a bit long I know) you’ll see that the OP knew all about the three dining areas, considered taking her car for the dog to sit in, so that she could eat anywhere and then decided not to. And just took it for granted that everyone would fall in with what she had decided.

Then she was miffed when other people said they were going to eat in the restaurant.

It’s actually not the doggy bit that’s getting to me, but the entitlement of you will all do what I want or you bad, bad people and no good friends.?

Saddens me that 'friends' decided to eat in an area that excluded you and your dog. Wouldn't have happened if I had been there I can tell you!
I do wonder though if there was a conversation about whether to take the dog or not if you were eating out. I have doggy friends and if we are all meeting up for a walk and a meal they would check first to see if it were doggy friendly occasion.
If it were me I would probably have said I can't take dog in restaurant does anyone want to join me in the conservatory? If the answer was no I would say, I'm off home then I'm hungry and don't fancy eating on my own.
I'm hoping the cars were at the venue and you didnt have an hours lonely walk home.

georgia101

They were wrong not to have chosen to eat where you could have been included with your dog. I don't think I'd consider them friends after this.

So like I said, the dog and it’s owner must come first, regardless of how anybody else feels about eating in the Conservatory with animals.

Let’s just be honest about this. They are not wrong. The dog owner assumed that everyone should fall in with her wishes and they didn’t.

Should we always fall in with what other people want? Or are we allowed to have a choice without being told we are wrong and bad friends and really not worth knowing.

Let’s remember this was the OPs choice. Is she the only person in the group who should be allowed on?

I think you’re pretty much in the minority Lathyrus (great username btw). I’m not a dog owner but I wouldn’t take a dog into a restaurant if I were. But that’s not the point here, the point is that it appears not to have been made clear to the OP what the restaurant’s dog-related policy was. If my friends walked away from me, when they could have compromised about where they ate, I’d be hurt too.

I’d tell them clearly “I going home because I can’t bring my dog in”! I hope they might think that over as they eat.

I wouldn’t have taken my dog.

The thing is undines, if everyone wants to eat in the restaurant except one person and that person gets their way, that’s not really compromise is it.

It’s one person getting it all their way.

They were wrong not to have chosen to eat where you could have been included with your dog. I don't think I'd consider them friends after this.

Gone home and text how upset I was.
Ghost these so called friends.
How dare they be so rude.
I’m wondering if they realised you were left out of the meal.

undines

And it's got nothing to do with loving the dog! It's about consideration for the dog OWNER, especially if there was an option that would have worked for everyone. Leaving that group would not be about punishing anyone (although maybe one or two would have the grace to feel guilty!) - it's about kindness to self and making space in your life for more empathic contacts.

Well there wasn’t an option that would have worked for everyone. That’s the point.

The OPs option (eat in an area with dogs) didn’t work for everyone. In fact it only worked for her because nobody else wanted it.

Usually in a group, you go with what most people want, not what suits just one person.

Can't see it was 'putting the dog first' to want to eat in the dog-friendly area provided. That's compromise, good-friendship, etc. Also, if you're a dog owner you rarely walk without your dog - seems unfair. But maybe this was about prior communication. Next time I'd make sure I found out what the 'rules' about dogs were, and if I did not like them, vote with my feet! And I agree Goldies are wonderful!

undines

Can't see that this is about putting the dog first, or 'before' friends. Everyone could have been accommodated. If these people are so non-doggie it's a pity this wasn't discussed before the outing. I agree that I would trust my dog before such folk, and that many people are far dirtier than dogs! That said, I would not inflict my dogs on those who are uneasy. Fortunately they just sit (hopefully) beneath the table, dozing, waiting for titbits and revelling in any petting that comes their way.

Can’t you really?

The OP thought everyone to eat in the Conservatory because she wanted to eat with her dog.

How is that not making the dog the most important factor in deciding where to eat

Can't see that this is about putting the dog first, or 'before' friends. Everyone could have been accommodated. If these people are so non-doggie it's a pity this wasn't discussed before the outing. I agree that I would trust my dog before such folk, and that many people are far dirtier than dogs! That said, I would not inflict my dogs on those who are uneasy. Fortunately they just sit (hopefully) beneath the table, dozing, waiting for titbits and revelling in any petting that comes their way.