Excuse me Officer, can you help me?
Certainly sir
I've been trying for three days to get into our local supermarket but it's so crowded
Is your visit essentila sir?
It is, I own the place.
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Very good Pittcity 
Keep them coming.
When one of my boys was very little, he loved Postman Pat, and for some strange reason was particularly fond of the character Mrs Goggins in the programme. I think he was about 2 at the time and mispronounced gloves as glubs, Very prone to randomly shouting out "Mrs Goggins has big glubs" there was always something of the double entendre about that assertion I did ponder at the time it could have easily been misconstrued.
Anyway he doesn't do it anymore!
A public health notice...
Very good TerriBull thank you and DH for sharing
Here are some reasonably funny jokes some of my husband's golfing pals have been sending him, happily not golf related:
To go to the grocery store, they said a mask and gloves were enough...............they lied...........everybody else had clothes on!
It was a quiet Monday morning in September 2053 when John awoke with a need to go to the bathroom. To John this wasn't just any ordinary day! This was the day he would open the last package of toilet paper his parents bought in the year 2020.
Our cleaning lady just called and told us she will be working from home and will send us instructions what do do.
We are about 3 weeks away from knowing everyone's true hair colour
3 hours into home schooling and 1 is suspended for skipping class and the other has already been expelled...........And the teacher sacked for drinking on the job!!!
That moment when you're worried about the elderly and realise that you are the elderly.
To those who are complaining about the quarantine period and curfews, just remember your grandparents were called to war; you are being called to sit on the couch and watch Netflix. YOU CAN DO THIS!
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs have placed Sneezy in quarantine.
Anybody else got any stick them here:
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