What have you discovered in friends’, acquaintances’ homes?

My husband and I were painting rooms for his parents while they were away on a trip. As I was walking past their bed, I noticed a big black bird under it. I thought it must be a decoration on a hat but found it was real and had died there. Later, when we told them about finding the bird, they said they had seen a lot of droppings on the wooden furniture, but they just thought we had splattered paint everywhere!

Monica - your DH surely has to direct a production of Peter Pan next...
Other side of this coin is that things that went missing after a visit of the DCs when young and I declared must be behind the sofa or at the back of a flower bed never actually were.

We were feeding a friend’s cat while they were away.
She was meant to stay downstairs in the living room and kitchen. One day she sneaked out as I opened the kitchen door and she ran upstairs.

I went to retrieve her from the main bedroom and saw they had a large framed charcoal drawing of the male partner very obviously engaged in a ‘personal activity’.

Like Chewbacca I wished I hadn’t seen it.

Quizzer Back in the early 60’s, my parents had a book which they had re-covered in brown paper. On the spine was written ‘Animals without Backbones’.
As a 13 year old I was not very interested in that sort of biology.
Years later, I found out that it was actually a copy of Lady Chatterley’s Lover.
Had I discovered this at the time, and smuggled it into school, I would have instantly rocketed to super-cool status.

As part of my work some years ago, I had to visit people in their homes. One person had a wall in their living room full of reproduction Victorian Memento Mori pictures (pictures of the dead).
Another person had a coffee table with a glass top, underneath the glass was something that looked very much like pubic hair in little clumps - I was too scared to ask!!

Many years ago, I dated a man who kept a chain saw in his kitchen! Rather worrying, I thought at the time. Oh, and sometimes there was also a motorbike in there too. I seem to remember he bought a uni-cycle but never quite got the hang of it, thank goodness! He was quite a character!

Hanging on the wall in the downstairs toilet of the home of a friend was a large picture of someone praying, underneath was the caption 'Oh God please let it be this time'

My MIL used to working for the council as a housing officer. She had to check out empty houses, she mostly saw vandalism, stolen radiators/boilers etc but she loves to tell the story of opening a living room door to find a huge alsation. Terrified until she discovered it was stuffed. Why would you go to the trouble and expense to stuff a loved pet then leave it behind

I have a blooming great metal Scorpion sculpture on the wall which looks a bit like a lobster to me! I actually ordered a pair of Geckos but they only had one left so sent the scorpion instead. It was too big to go back so DH suggested we put it on the wall to see what it looked like. It looks awful, collects dust and frightens small children but DH loves it so there it stays. I am working on a plan...!
The Gecko, which I wanted on the wall has somehow ended up in the garden.

An apparently straightlaced couple in our baby sitting cirlce had some books turned spine inwards in their bookcase. One of the members- not me, honest! - turned then round to see what they were and they were all kinky sex manuals!!

How do you know he's sleeping is he snoring

??never disturb a sleeping dinosaur ?

I have an orange plastic dinosaur on the ceiling in my sitting room. Its been there for 3 years, since one of my grand-children threw it there!! Its only little (thankfully!) but has become quite a talking point. It seems quite happy up there, and shows no signs of dropping off....................
would take a photo, but he's asleep at the moment, and I don't want to disturb him

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pictures to accompany the above post, I hope, (they did not attach before)

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I have a large stuffed lioness sitting on my bed and a huge Steiff Polar Bear in my lounge. We are not allowed pets so i have improvised, can't have too many stuffed toys.
Another talking point in my lounge is the Tutankhamun sarcophagus which stands in the corner.

Oh this is rather good. I don't think I can compete with that.

As a teenager I had a fake dog poo (from a joke shop) which we thought hysterically funny to leave on the floor near the toilet during a party. Then we would stand in the hallway watching people's reactions as they came out. Would they say something or pretend they hadn't seen it? I can't believe some of the things I did!

My aunt and uncle came back to Scotland after several years in Kenya. They brought back with them, and placed on the front room fireplace, a glass case containing a scorpion. Apparently one of their servants had stopped it from stinging their little boy.

We have a large radio-controlled rat sitting on the bookcase.
DGS was playing with it at Christmas and I'm leaving it out to see if anyone notices

A friend of mine, who I've known for nearly 40 years, is very "staid and proper"; never been known to ever mention sex, on any level, ever. So I was a bit taken aback when she recently offered to show me her newly decorated and furnished bedroom and hanging on the wall, just above their bed, was a self portrait of my friend and her husband. I don't know whether she'd forgotten that it was there or if she'd become so used to it that she no longer saw it, but I'm finding it hard to irradicate the image from my brain. Wish I hadn't seen it.

I have motorbike fuel tanks and panels under my dining room table and motorbike parts in my kitchen cupboards and every room in my house except my bedroom ( i point blank refuse) 2 full motorcycles in the conservatory , god alone knows how many are in the outbuildings and sheds and there is at least 4 used as garden ornaments, dont even start me on the rest of his junk

I once viewed a house that was up for sale, and in the main bedroom was a wardrobe which stuck out at a strange angle. Behind it was a plumbed-in, functioning toilet, in full view of the window! No partition, door or even a curtain! We didn't buy that house........

I currently have an eight foot long alligator in my living room. It is a soft toy alligator from Hamleys and answers to the name of Lorenzo.

DH bought him about three months ago at an antiques fair for a performance of The Magic Flute that he was directing. Lorenzo is an excellent actor. The review in the local paper featured a large photograph of him and praised his performance.

Now the show is over we have this large stuffed alligator back home and the only room we can find space for him, is inthe living room. Still he is a good conversation piece.

However Maw you now need to find the engine. ?

I’ve been looking everywhere for that Mini Cooper bonnet!