Own up ! Do you do this ?

Me too. I'm far too thick to be secretly anything. And I believe in treating others as I would want to be treated.

Popped in to read replies and wasn't surprised at one member's comments. Says it all really!

I am the same on here as I am in real life.

In day to day life, I've not "crossed swords" with anyone. I feel most of us do the best we can. Responding on here, I don't know enough about the poster OR his/her situation to make assumptions and don't like seeing pointed criticisms that cross the line from constructive to hurtful.

I have friends and family who believe differently than I do in political, religious or other aspects of life and we have discussions that do get earnest but not rude or argumentative. My family and friends are just too important to me. If I want to "vent" about something in general, I'll post about the situation or talk to someone who believes as I do and we let off steam. If I want to try to make changes, I get involved in some way.

TBH I have never encountered such anger, rudeness, swearing, snide comments, put downs, or intolerance in RL as I have seen on GN
It may be that this is a feature of social media in general, a “curtain” of relative anonymity encouraging some people to be braver or more honest than they might be face to face - who knows? Or perhaps I lead a sheltered life.
That said, I have also encountered and been supported by real friendship and care.
It may depend on whether you send more time on the “political” threads or in the safety of Soop’s Kitchen.

I call it being " assertive " if I have to give an answer to something that I don't agree with. I'm not by nature a nasty person but at the same time I've learned over the years that you don't appear to get on in life if you're polite and just sit back. It seems to be the vogue to snap back at the least thing

And I still want to know what the hell we're supposed to be "owning up" to. Perhaps the OP could come back and phrase her OP in a more accessible manner?

This is just a thread to encourage back-biting against other posters without having to find the courage to speak out against them directly. Cowardly or what?

I'm a bit like Jane10 sometimes annoyed by a comment so it elicits a snappy response. I tend to do this in real life too so have to be prepared to get as good as I give.

I was brought up under the old adage of 'common courtesy costs nothing' and I can't shake it off under any circumstances. Certainly not on an anonymous website or even in real life if someone was rude to me.

I enjoy debate but am sometimes astonished at the way in which interesting, respectful and thoughtful differences of opinions can rapidly turn into a bunfight on some threads.

I try to give impartial and sensible advice when people ask for help on Gransnet.

I would be no different in real life.

Sometimes I do wonder if posters would give some of their very forthright and sometimes angry replies in the same way in real life.

The thing is one posters nasty can be another posters normal.
So it’s possible to be offended when no offence was intended. Or cause offence when none was intended .
We don’t have the benefit of reading body language or hearing tone of voice , but on saying that the meaning of the written can be very clear indeed. ... ..

YesGG13 ....I think you could be right, and I want lots of presents this year as I have been amazingly good and patient when on threads here.?

I’m not anonymous either having met lots of GNers, even had holidays with them as well as coffee meet ups and meals out.
Am much the same in RL as on here, can do robust when needed but only on political and news threads.Generally I prefer to keep things light.?

Well done BradfordLass. I like that.

I think the OP is Father Christmas and they are vetting us for the naughty or nice list ???

I am pretty much the same online and in real life. I'm usually even tempered and tolerant but I can certainly be sharp if I think the situation warrants it.

Yesterday, for instance, a friend of mine (64) almost tripped

She's a very big lady and walks with a stick. Several people went towards her to assist as she said, 'I really don't want to fall, I find it so hard to get up.'

One guy (I confess, I don't like him) said, 'It'd take a crane to get you up!' laughing as if this is a joke.

I snapped at him, 'Don't be so bloody rude!' and the whole room fell silent.

I know those present would have preferred me to keep my big trap shut but even had she been a complete stranger, I would have defended agains such rudeness.

I don't understand the OP.

What are we supposed to be owning up to? Being nasty? Or being nice?

aggie I d say the same I wouldn’t say anything here that I wouldn’t say in normal life
I can’t butter up though I do say what I feel but never ever been knowingly nasty

I never say anything that I couldn't say to someones face , I don't think I am nasty , but I do believe in being honest

I am not anonymous on here as I have been to several meet ups. But I would hope I would never be deliberately nasty.

I'm not anonymous. Sometimes I'm sufficiently irritated by a post/poster to write a nippy response. Probably because I'm human!

Not at all sure about the tone/meaning of the OP!

Good point. I’m also not anonymous and imagine that is true for many of us.

Same here