Trans Children

I am so horrified as to how much ignorance and prejudice has been shown in this thread.
One of my grand children - born a girl - was always a very girly type of girl, loved pink and glitter, etc. As she grew up and moved in Secondary school she became very uptight, obviously unhappy and seemed to have few, if any, friends. When she went to Secondary school her bedroom was redecorated to her choice - fairies
At the age of 12 yrs she told her parents and the family that she thought she was Gay. Well, many of us had had our suspicions about this for some time.
Within nine months she stated that she did not think she was gay, just felt she was a boy born into a girls body. For years she had to prove to herself that she was a girl by going for all those very girly things.
Since then he has lived, extremely happily, as a boy. Has become a much happier person, plenty of friends, loads of activities and good GCSE results this summer.
Obviously at this young age, the only difference was he used a breast binder and took the mini pill.
As he moves into sixth form, he is now saying that he is Questioning, and is using the pronoun 'THEY' as opposed to 'HE'.
They are fortunate that they have an extremely supportive direct and extended family.
All I know is that this young person seems to have come out of that depression they had a few years back and is leading a good life.
I really do not care with they are a HE or a SHE or a THEY as long as they are content and happy.
At the moment they are fairly protected from some of the dreadful prejudice and misunderstand that has appeared on here. I do know that not all young people in their circumstances as are fortunate.

Just let kids be kids and they ll decide their role soon enough
If they want to wear jeans instead of dresses let them if they want to have short hair instead of long let them but I would not expect them to change name, school, and be known as the opposite sex at age 4 nor even .14 Those parents of the little girl called Mia have created the problem by allowing a big thing to be made out of what may or may not be a phase
Treat a child as a child with love respect and attention immaterially to its gender

are the most generous caring giving people Sorry bradfordlass but that can’t be true I m sure there are as many bitches witches and wild ones in the trans community as every other walk of life Why would you set them up to be different to all the rest of us I thought they needed to be treated normally

children will be how they want ,my friend who is a real action man told us no pink,frilly or girly things for the expected baby.We all conformed and grey tracksuit and baby trainers were duly sent.The same with birthdays and christmases until she turned 4 ,then she discovered PINK ,she is the most girly girl you could ever imagine because that how SHE wants to be .
Trans children are just the same ,they know how they are meant to be ,some from a very early age .The checks by medics are lengthy and exhaustive ...no one is given hormones at an early age and certainly not of there are doubts .At the end of the day trans people are just people we need to lose the "trans" badge and let them get on with living how they want .It shouldn't affect how you or yours live your lives so leave them be .
Its very like the arguements when "gay" marriage was first mooted....its not "gay" marriage its just marriage ..we dont say "straight" marriage do we? Live and let live ,its the 21st century not the middle ages .We have no rights over over peopels bodies or sex lives or mindset thats all we need to know .

My DGS is autistic. Life has been really hard for him. The name calling bullying have taken it’s toll on our lovely boy. I can’t help but worry for the children who identify as something other than their birth sex who have to cope with a world that doesn’t like anyone who is different.

Because its telling the child they can chose their sex. They cant.
It isn't. It's allowing the child to be free of other people's stereotypically gendered ideas.
(At least for a few early years.)

The moral being, leave the poor children alone until they're in their teens and wish to decide for themselves !!

Gonegirl going back to changing mats the only one I used and still do now is my knee

There seems to be a general confusion about the difference between sex and gender.

Sex is immutable, and is generally observed at birth to be either male (xy) or female (xx). The number of babies born with an intersex condition (xxy, xxx, xo or yo) is small (estimated as 1.7%).

Gender has more to do with a societies expectations/rules of behaviour...boy things...girl things etc. Most of us are happy to have a gender 'role' that happens to coincide with our born sex. Some are not.

We should all be free to adapt our gender roles as we choose. But these choices must not be allowed to impinge on others in a negative way, through denial of sex differences or by forcing others to accept unscientific and incorrect beliefs that a person can change sex!

I don't see a problem with trying to raise a child without gender expectations or influences. Unfortunately once we know the babies sex, boy or girl then our learned prejudices have a tendency to slip out whether intentionally or not.

Blimey, reading some of these medieval ideas makes me wonder how you get through modern life.

It's as bad as "people choose to be gay" and "anyone can lose weight" and "the feckless poor deserve all they get".

We are actually in the 21st century you know and you can tell a heterosexual child it's gay until you'\re blue in the face, it won't make it gay.

Do you honestly believe (or even know) what transgender kids and adults go through? You can have no conception of the pain and anguish, mental and physical suffered when you are not the person your body says.

I have several gay and transgender friends and without exception they have:
1) known since their earliest days that they were not "as presented" so to speak.
2) are the most generous, giving and caring people you could wish to meet.
3) have gone through absolute HELL due to the ignorant, mealy mouthed few, some of whom post on GN I'm sorry to say.
4) are not in any way sick (unless you count being sick to the back teeth of mindless. stupid bigots. .

They wanted to have been able to wear girls clothes and do what girls do (play with dolls etc) and be like their sister from about that age

That is not whay either makes a girl or how it feels to be a girl.

The trans person that I know has said that she felt the wrong sex from possibly about 4 or 5 . They wanted to have been able to wear girls clothes and do what girls do (play with dolls etc) and be like their sister from about that age, so the statement made by agnurse that brains are not fully developed until 25 is wrong. Physically, it may be correct, but emotionally, which can't be measured, it is wrong.
Please also don't confuse being gay with transgender - it is a completely different thing - if someone prefers to have sex or is attracted to their own sex, it no way means that they actually want to be the opposite sex!

The baby whose gender hasn't been revealed isn't trans, as far as anyone knows.
Why do people keep talking about that baby on this thread about trans

Because its telling the child they can chose their sex. They cant.
They can only chose to like or dislike things that have gender steriotypes attatched to them. But nobody can chose (or alter) their sex

FarNorthas far as I can see none of her family have given her stereotypical gender roles. No one has suggested she can't behave as she wants- she has always been supported. But besides doing what some might term boys' things she insists she is a boy. It is not easy for parents and some may say she will change her mind. The point is that she has stated what she wants I don't understand the idea that she is too young to do such a thing when she has already done it. Of course there is a wide spectrum, some children won't present until adulthood some children will change their minds but some will not. It's question of do you love and support them or do you tell them they have got things wrong? I know which I would do.

LondonGranny

Your friend is male. He has Klinefelter syndrome.

Surely the gender is shown on the birth certificate? Why confuse the wider family with this attitude?
My daughter wanted to pee ‘like daddy’ when she was about 2.
I wouldn’t let my son have a toy gun so he used whatever he could find or just pointed his finger and said ‘BANG’ That showed me!!

Kids are like that, they are free spirits.

Our DGS aged 7 loves tea parties and Barbie so what?

They’ll grow up to be what they want to be.

I personally know no-one whose children, AC GC or GGC, are 'going through' this.
I have no truck with any pc nonsense anyway.
It's ridiculous in the extreme.

Each to his/her/ze/they (what stupidity) own.

In the video, we see the little girl getting a haircut.
It is not cut as short as she would like.
Clearly, the adults think that really short hair is not suitable for a girl so she can't have that.

That must be only a tiny part of the reinforcement of stereotypes that the child received from family and friends, which caused her to think she was 'made wrong'.

in which case the adults around them should change the steriotype/gender expectations -Which if you watch the whole video, is exactly what the parents are doing.

They are not. They are insisting that the child is a boy because she likes 'boy things' and short hair.

not lie to the child that they can change sex to escape gender stetiotypes - Which is DEFINITELY not what the parents are doing.

That's exactly what they are doing.
They have told the child that she is now a boy and she doesn't have to 'be Mia' any more.

The baby whose gender hasn't been revealed isn't trans, as far as anyone knows.
Why do people keep talking about that baby on this thread about trans children?

By making it a big mystery other people will reinforce steriotypes even more by looking for clues in the childs likes/behaviours

Very sweet little baby isn't he she it?

Whassup Gillybob?

Oh dear

It isn't the CHILD they don't want to adhere to gender stereotypes, they don't want family/friends imposing stereotypes on the child.

We perform gender all the time. And make VAST assumptions about babies based on the gender we think they are. So if we don't know the childs gender, we have to base opinions on what the child does, NOT on a gendered reading of what the child is doing. He is definitely not growing up in a neutral environment.

Both my daughter and myself are fine with whatever DGS wants to be. It is currently looking as if he is ALL boy. Great! If he later wants to be effeminate OR feminine, great! BUT he's picked up LOADS of 'boy' messages because that is what the world (including us) does.

From about the age of 5 I informed my parents I was a boy. I had my toy cars, trucks, went to the loo stood up. Wore shorts. Short hair. My parents just went along with it all. I have no memory of being told I needed to play with dolls etc etc. My sister, 4 years my senior was very pink and lacy. I was the opposite.

It was no big deal. It's how I was. All was fine. David Essex made me realise I was in actual fact female and that was that,

Just let your child be your child. They won't necessarily want to go the pink for girl/blue for boy route.

No need to go too far. Wait until they are older before getting too involved in it all.