Foul mouthed and bossy friend.

My family rent a Landmark Trust house every year for 3 to 5 days. I email a list of things to bring asking non cooks to bring wine,crisps etc.We don’t want to spend all the time in supermarkets! We all help cook and I usually plan a quiz one evening! As everyone can tell I like organising things and the others always seem to enjoy it. Honest? It helps to make a plan before but we all go off and do different things in the day meeting for a drink or lunch.

We have all had a great time!

I’ve been on holiday with friend who drove me mad and I’m sure I did them same to them, they would not go to eat out and criticised my food choices. We are great friends still but will not go on holiday together again.

I've never felt the need to go away with friends or my adult children and their family either. I like to suit myself on holiday and meet new people . A day trip with family is more than enough.

So you have friends in common - let them deal with it! If they take his side of the story, they aren't your friends either!
I am just confused as to why that side of him hadn't shown up before? Or had it, you could walk away and it not bother you too much

I have never been on a shared holiday since my DCs where small,we went to a shared cottage with my sister and her OH DCs,the food and other shopping was all ok and done before we left for Wales.
We decided each family would take turns on cooking breakfast and evening meals all went fine for the first 2/3 days but before we went out for the day I expected her to help me tidy the cottage for our return in the late afternoon,she decided she was on holiday and would tidy when she came back and with me being a neat freak I could not bare the thought of coming back to an untidy cottage so the ballon went up and we had one massive row about it,needless to say a very tence week was had by all and never to be repeated,to make matters worse she phoned our mum to report that I had been a bully and I got told off by our mum without her listening to my reasons

I am also wary of shared holidays with anyone since sister experience. However I've shared with my brother and SiL and their family a few times since. We had ground rules.
Each family took turns to cook the evening meal . We spent our days separately for the most part, some birdwatching, others hang-gliding so that evenings could be relaxed and we didn't have to watch their parenting mistakes .
The accommodation had to be well chosen and large enough though and one year SiL was depressed because the place she'd found had a view of the cement works and not the ocean as advertised.
No one else minded. We just thought it funny but I think she got a refund!

We have only been on holiday with friends once, never again.
We went to Scotland with them and they expected us to do the same as them every day, which was mainly bird and wildlife spotting, which is ok up to a point. One day DH and I decided to do our own thing and get on a local bus and explore the area - well, we never heard the end of it, things were never the same again; they took umbrage at this and the friendship never recovered.
Also went to stay with sister and her DH - never again. Better not say anything else in case she's on here and puts two and two together!

BradfordLass72
Well, she's no 'good friend' if she would put you and your children in a possibly dangerous position.

That must have been the holiday from hell Hamalasyno no need for people like that in your life.

BradfordLass what an horrendous experience, I can't believe your so called friend let you walk into that situation with your children. You were lucky to escape as you did.

If you have known them 45 years, I'm amazed you haven't seen this bombastic 'know it all' attitude before.

Yes, I did once find myself in a similar situation.
Whilst still in the UK, I was arranging a job with a man I'd never met, who lived in the same NZ town as a good friend.
I asked her and her husband to meet this potential employer and let me know her impressions.
This was important because for the first 2 weeks after arrival, I would be living in his property with my children.
They met up, spent the morning and lunchtime together and her report was favourable.
However, when I met him, I knew instantly that he was alcoholic and not only because he met us, dead drunk, at the airport and drove us, weaving all over the road, to where we were to stay.
During the next few days he stole what little cash I had, threatened my children and actually tried to strangle my elder son.

If anyone knows what a full-nelson is, that's how I stopped him. He told people later that I tried to break his neck.
Don't tempt me. You don't attack my children and get away with it.

He was drunk the whole time but he had picked the wrong person to intimidate.
One morning, when he had stumbled his way to the boozer (he couldn't find his car keys) for 'breakfast', I rang the police, told them I was about to steal his car and why.
I packed the boys into the vehicle, took the keys from where I'd hidden them the night before, and drove 200 miles up country to the friend who had originally vetted this joker.

I asked her if she had detected his alcohol problem and she admitted, quite blithely, 'Oh yes, I saw he was a horrible man and obviously dangerous but I didn't like to say.'
Words failed me.

People can be different in holiday mode. I knew my sister pretty well but she was a monster on that holiday. She was pregnant so I suppose I can blame it on hormones and I had a small baby so even more hormones..
Perhaps your friend was in pain?

I only wonder why on earth you decided to go on holiday with them, you must have had some idea what they were like, they sound vile, no great loss to your social circle

You can do without those "friends".

Only once with my sister, years ago. We made up later but we have never holidayed again together. Stayed with each other yes but gone away together no way!
We both had small children at the time and she insisted on her arrangements for everything. Her decisions about food and so on.
We had rented the cottage and there were no end of complaints about it, from the lack of bathrooms to the distance from the beach. You get the picture.
Our DH were keeping out of the way and were only too pleased when the holiday was cut short. I think the kids were disappointed.

No, thank goodness. Though I've heard many a heated argument at airports and wondered how the dickens could anyone enjoy a holiday together with that going on, when they've clearly all been together as family or friends
.
How awful for you, a lesson learned albeit a bit late. You're well rid I'd have said.