loss of youth and vigour

Each age has had its ups and downs for me - prominent teeth were finally straightened in my 30's; now, at 64 I can't do as much all in one go - but at least have the freedom to take my time. Each time I hear someone else's story - perhaps of illness or loss- it reminds me to try to make the most of everything as it is now - because it's all I have. If I moan about getting older my 92 year old mother tells me off!

Geranium I agree about the sunshine. My son used to live in California and older people there just don't seem to be old in the way they do in Britain. Many of them were wrinkly, I guess due to that very sunshine we hanker after, but they're vigorous and active and youthful in outlook. It's hard to have that mindset as I look out at today's grey sky and the rain falling in sheets.

Not giving up - still going to the gym and trying to get that body. Never pays to lack optimism and believe me I’m having to apply it in droves!

In that old song by Joni Mitchell, "You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone" - true, isn't it?
You can only make the best of what you've got at the time.
I was never Miss World, feeling that others had better hair and prettier features, etc, etc. Now I look back and see that that was as good as it got! It can't have been as bad as I felt at the time.

I never really thought I was all that pretty, so I don't really mourn my youthful looks.

Like others, I would like to be able to work all day at housework or gardening, but those days are long gone.

However, there are advantages: I can do as I please when I please now that I have retired and we are comfortably off.

A great relief after years of penny -pinching.

Still healthy too.

Looking back I cannot believe I was able to do what I did. A full time job, housework, cooking, shopping etc all the things you do when you have a family and still finding time to have a nights out with friends where as now even thinking about it exhausts me .
Now its shopping on line having it delivered ,feet up when ever I feel like it and a 'night out' with friends has been replaced by 'coffee and cake' mornings.
I do miss the twenty four seven energy I once had but as long as I am able to remember those times the fact I am far from wrinkle free and can no longer party the night away does not bother me.

I am sure more sunshine is what we all need. The Dr recently said to me 'have you tried The Mediterranean Diet?'(they all seem to go on about the blinking Mediterranean Diet) Yes I have, I eat healthily lots of home grown fruit and veg. but what this lovely old country of ours lacks is the Mediterranean sun!

I'll admit that I was terrified of getting older. To me it was the worst thing that could happen. I felt it more acutely after my kids had flown the nest and I was left alone.

Now I'm actually enjoying my freedom. I'm in my final year of a BA and am even thinking of doing an MA when I've finished that. I'm permanently broke and have the usual aches and pains, but I'm planning for the future again, something I couldn't have imagined a few years ago.

I often think of a couple of my school mates who died in their teens. One lad's parents and sister remember his birthday in the local paper every year. He died of cancer at 14 and never got to travel, have a family or even finish his education. After a couple of near misses, I'm just grateful to still be here.

I'm in no way minimising how you feel, I totally get it. I have dark days sometimes too. Make little plans, take pleasure in the small things.

When I was younger (several millenia ago) an elderly friend of my grandmother said to me that the wrinkles on her face were like a map of her life. They were the journey and not the destination. We all know what the destination is but should enjoy the scenery on the way there.

Hope you're feeling more positive soon. I bet you're doing a lot better than you think you are

I feel exactly the same, old age jumps on you it would seem all at once. You cannot do things, ie walk as far climbing stairs, drink as much alcohol, dance. It is so frustrating. But it doesn’t seem to be the way with everyone. I am 73yrs. But there are people the same age and older than me who do not seem to be affected this way. Or are they?

..."you don't know what you've got 'till it's gone" , very true lyric in lots of ways.

Beauty is different when we are older. Shine on the inside and people will see it on the outside. I tell people to read Desederata regularly....it is calming

I have gained a lot of wisdom over the years and wish I knew back then what I know now so wouldn't change all the experiences I've had ...although my body would love to go back.

guess we have all had different lives.. I am 83, and look good for my age, genetic, but energy, I have little,, I have found some good friends at our local church recently, and they sure do help, as I worked full time, studied for professional qualifications, and brought up two boys and a husband, husband still with me,, hard work, no fault of his.

I just miss the prospect of the future! know what I mean?

I don't totally agree with you Cherrytree59 there were a lot of stresses for me when I was younger, children, finances, job etc. Now I can relax more, children and grandchildren all grown up and doing well. I have time to sit back and enjoy my peaceful contented life.

I miss the care free days of my youth.
No worries or anxiety.
Hard to believe that my stock phrase was
'Don't Panic!"

I miss being told how young for my age I look because suddenly I don't. Recently a young man gave up his seat on the bus for me and I was glad to take it. Got a birthday card which said "You can't turn back the clock but you can keep it ticking". It's all we can do!

I thought I was ageing well until I hit 75. Then.

I am also feeling sad about loss of vigour,facial wrinkles and greying hair. However I am incredibly thankful to still be here after recovering from serious illness and being resuscitated. I have lived to see my daughter married and birth of 2 gorgeous grandchildren. Life is still very precious although the body has changed the spirit is still young.

I've used Oil of Ulay for about 30 years. Wonderful stuff.

What a fabulous gathering it sounds M0nica!

I think you are right too about our genetic inheritance to a certain extent! My Mum always looked after her skin (Oil of Ulay it was in those days lol!) and her body, and whilst I'm not quite as slim as she was at my age, I think I'm doing ok being a fittish size 10! And my mind is still in it's 20's hahaha!

Dare I say it, without sounding smug, that like Paddyann I am aging wel, although I am 10 years older, I come from a family that obviously has the genes for aging well. It includes a gene that I share with some cousins of not going more than slightly grey until our late 70s - 80s. I am back to size 10/12 after weight gain during the menopause.

We had a cousins gathering 10 days ago. 10 of us plus spouses, aged from late 60s to 80. Only one was overweight, Everyone looked and sounded fit and able. Four of us still dark haired with little or no grey.

The party included the one survivor of our parents generation, aged 91, living independently, still driving locally and as mentally alert as ever, and quite happy to do a 200 mile round trip with her daughter to be with us for the day ( and you can still see that she originally had dark hair).

As I said, no credit to any of us, just our genetic inheritance.

I feel young inside still but I find standing too long (as in mooching round the shops, which I used to love) tells on me now. I am always glad to call it a day and head for the car and go home to a nice cup of tea. More tea-breaks figure in my day now. I am always glad to sit down and watch the world go by.

I have always had quite a youthful face but now, mid sixties, it's got fine lines. I call them laughter lines. They stayed away for a good long time, so I cannot complain. As for the sagging skin on the backs of hands, how did that happen????

I don't mind ageing. I dread losing my marbles and mobility though. I have only recently thought about the future and deterioration of the body. I guess it's up to us all to keep going for as long as we can. I know of many dear people who didn't even get a retirement, never mind an old age, my dear Dad being one of them.

Paddyann, size 8/10 ?

I'm OK I still look after GC a lot ,work part time help my daughter who has health issues and do all the housework,shopping,cooking at home.I admit I dont like socialising as much as I did but thats more because I've just had enough of people after working with the public for 50 years.I do go to family things ,usually make the celebration cake s for them too.
Looks wise ,I agree many of us had problems seeing what others saw when we were young.In my case I was a middle sister and had a stunningly beautiful older sister and my mother never let me forget that SHE was the beautiful one.It only recently occured tome that I have often been mistaken for that "Beautiful" sister over the years..so I cant have been the ugly duckling I thought I was .Still no wrinkles at 65 and a size8/10 .A lot to be grateful for .My daughter has always called me her glamourous wee mum...I laugh at that because its not what I see in the mirror.

Very true rockgran I can remember whingeing about being 50 and someone said to me 'I wish I was 50'. I thought 'how ridiculous' Now I wish I was 50 !