Heartbroken!!

Thought it was just me crazyH !

Just a normal teenager I'm afraid.

Your grandaughter is growing up, has a lot of study to do for her exams and just other things to do ! Just leave her to her own devices for a bit and when she has time, will no doubt be happy to go shopping with you- especially if you are paying!
Mind you, for several years my niece used to come over at weekends and I used to take her shopping. We even went to several concerts together (I usually bought the tickets) but one day, while she was at college, she announced that she didn't want to go with me the next year. I could understand that, and she said she'd come again once she had finished college. Then she met her husband, got married, now teaches and I very rarely see her - apart from a brief visit right before her birthday !

It's called being a teenager, don' take it personally as mine are the same but when I do see them I receive a smile and hug fit to die for

I 'returned' M, my 12 year old grandson, to his parents yesterday and am expecting L, his (almost) 17 year old brother, to arrive later today for a 4/5 day stay.
M expressed that it was 'too quiet' and he missed the 'noise' of home. (He's also ASD/ADHD). I have a feeling that anything other than an overnight visit is a thing of the past with him now. L will probably still pay extended visits for a few more years for "chill out time".
It is hard watching them grow up and become independent but so rewarding.

13 year old grandson coming here today for the rest of the week.But, he freely confesses it's mostly to get away from the killing exercise regime his mother imposes on him. Don't see sight nor sound of the 17 year old these days unless his mum physically ropes him up and bundles him into the car.

Where did those little sweeties that loved coming to granny's house go to? Bit

(Mind you, I sometimes think I'm better off without .) No getting up early to provide breakfast.

Not really!

yes. really.

If she's studying for GCSE's then when she stops, she wants time to do the things she most wants to do and that will probably be relaxing with her friends. My 18 year old son is studying for his A levels and although we have a great relationship with him, our company is not what he wants when he has his downtime.
Just let her know you will be there for her if she needs you for anything and get ready to send a present for when she gets the grades she wanted at GCSE results time. You may well find that, by that time, she is ready to visit again.

Reading all your comments I realise how lucky I am
My 16yr old Granddaughter texts me with updates & photos every few weeks It’s so good to get them Sometimes she even asks for a bit of advice xxxxx

*"We used to go shopping and I would always treat her"
"but to not want your nan to treat you at all seems strange?"*

My grandson is 12 and loves to come and stay but that could be to get some peace from his little sister. But I’m under no illusion that any year now it’s gonna be “no thanks man, I’m sleeping over with mates” . Think yourself lucky that you’ve had her company until 16. Very unusual.

Charlies, she is 16 and its not cool to shop with your gran and as for visits, well she has other interests now. Give it 4 years or more and she will come back to wanting to visit. My gc was the same so I backed off now at 22 she is messaging me about every two months asking to meet up as she hasn't seen me for a while. Just give it time.

if you're on FB add her to your page ,my older two MSG me regularly about silly stuff and about other more serious things ..they help care for their mum who is often bedbound.I'd be delighted if mine could have a normal life instead of looking after mum and their little sister while Stepdad is working away .Let her enjoy being 16

I am sure she will choose to spend time with you again.
I was always close to my nan but in the teen years my life seem too full of new things......once I turned twenty I wanted to be close to her again.
I have seen a similar in my oldest granddaughter. I give her the space to choose how much see stays in contact and that feels right.
I always remember that being young is a time to explore it doesn't mean you have turned away from people you love.

Growing up, I'm afraid. It's quite sad. Nothing you've done. Let them go and they will always come back is the best advise I've heard.

Oldest grandchild, a boy has just turned 13 and I miss him! He often doesn't come up with the others as is allowed to be at home on his own for a couple of hours. I always get a hug from him when I do see him but not always much of a conversation. We have to accept that our grandchildren grow up and don't need us so much although they know we are there if they need us.

I have a 16 year old GD too and don't see much of her because she now works in a restaurant (apprentice chef). She loves her job and we are extremely proud of her . To see her more often we go and eat at her work, she always pops out to see us and give hugs kisses regardless of who is in view.
They are just moving on as we did but the love will hopefully always be there.
I think when they get older and become parents themselves they revert to seeing more of older generation and that's good too.

Mawbroon I checked it first and copied it from a site of Oscar Wilde quotes. I have known this quote from time immemorial and always had it attributed to Wilde.

Sorry, M0nica, I have to agree with Maw. Every reference I've found on line confirms that the origin of this quotation is from Mark Twain.

Now, now ladees...

I have been unable to find the site I had this evening, so you must be right, but:

quoteinvestigator.com/2010/10/10/twain-father/

She'll come back to you.. I've no doubt.. She's probably preoccupied with other things at present.. Have faith, take up painting or yoga and then you can have something new to discuss when she drops by. Whatever you do, don't appear needy.. Good luck

My eldest grandson who I did so much with for years, changed when he was 13-14 and it was hurtful for me...as I wasn't prepared [no one had warned me], nor expecting it to be so blunt and sudden.

The boy who used to throw himself at me for hugs had changed, just grunts, embarrassment and distance. I had to accept it but found it difficult at first. Now I'm used to it and get a hug when I see him now he's matured to be a 20 year old.

I am now prepared for the next 3 to change in their own ways but will find it a bit sad all the same. I'm enjoying them now while they are 11, 6 and 3.

Our sons' headmaster warned us about them entering 'the long, dark tunnel of adolescence' and assured us they would emerge as butterflies at the end! Two of them did, still waiting for the third!