Soop`s Kitrchen,a refuge and sanctuary for genteel folk

? Panache, and to all of you struggling with worry, sadness and uncertainty, TOYA.

I'm relieved to read that your DH does not have the DVT in his leg Panache and can see how much you are dreading Wednesday's visit to the hospital. We are all wishing you both strength and good wishes.

When DH's parents died six days apart in January, we had to endure several people say to us ' How lovely for them to go together'. It was and is sheer hell for us. Grief is selfish I know.
Ann and Maw ??
Hope your appointment goes well Dragonfly
To all those with worries and coping with 'buggerations' ?

Dear Panache I’m so sorry that things aren’t looking good. Sending love and hugs. ?

So sorry things are looking gloomy Panache. It’s very sad for both of you. I hope your husband has a reasonably comfortable journey on Wednesday. Thinking of you both ?

Pananche Us lot are with you and your husband in thought and spirit. Keep sharing your feelings with us. You matter.

dragonfly Please keep us updated. It is a very stressful time. Sharing may be of some comfort to you.

Panache so sorry to hear things are so difficult for you at the moment. I really hope the scan on Wednesday goes better than you expect.

I am sorry you are suffering from a normal reaction too surgery Soop. I too am a person who never feels they will be typical so it always comes as a shock when you comply to the norm.

I am meeting my oncologist again tomorrow after her Easter holidays and wonder what that will bring.

TOYA

Panache having gone through this same scenario so recently myself, my heart goes out to you.
I know just how you are feeling.
Strength and courage to you in the coming days.

Panache,Sending our love,thoughts and prayers to you and your dear husband.I wish we lived nearer so we could be a practical help to you but know we are thinking of you.
To everybody else TOYA?

How I wish I could be a happy face and the bearer of uplifting news for a change.

Although grateful my man`s swoollen leg is not thought to be a DVT,but the consultation was a very upsetting one, as we are gradually being obviously prepared for more than Prostate Cancer.My worst fears are indeed about to be confirmed....... and I dread this trip Wednesday.
Having been down this long and difficult route myself time and time again,having been heavily involved in Cancer Care you would think I could take it on the chin.
However at this age and failing myself,seeing my one and only in this position is tough.Especially when neither of us have any other family member to lean on occasionally.

But of course, I know full well we are far from being alone,all around there are so many struggling with their varying lot,life is truly a roller coaster.

TOYA and every blessing.

Bellanonna no I do not because if he does bully her she does not cling to me for quite so long.

I am trying to forget her age- she is around at least 14. The vet obviously could not give an accurate age all of those years ago when I chose her at CPL. She was a lot livelier and moanier today which were good signs. I am not sure where she is resting her eyes because she does not like being disturbed but it is okay to wake me at 5 am!

*ann and Maw, unbelievable! ☹️
soop, rest, rest, rest
Charleygirl I do hope Tara is ok. Do you think the bullying tomcat has frightened her?

ann and maw people can be so thoughtless. You have had a long period of worry and anxiety ann. It will take some time for you to come to terms with all the emotion of the past few years. Hope you get more support from your kitchen pals.

Hello poorly kitty. Hope you feel better soon. Not getting too close as we are going away at the weekend and I don’t want to catch anything, so I’ll give you a ? from over here.?. I’ve left some cough sweets on the side for you (sorry they’re a bit fluffy, they’ve been in my coat pocket for a while )
soop please rest up as much as possible and don’t try overdoing things.
annelise I often fall into the kitchen. Usually, because I’ve forgotten, yet again, where I have put my glasses (no it is not the .... well not often anyway )
Hello panache hope you and MrP are ok. Was there another scan today? Hope all is well.
TOYA

Maw my parents died 19 days apart 40 years ago and at the funeral of my dad, I heard somebody say- it will be okay for her now she will return to London and continue as normal! Sorry, but it is all still in my mind 40 years later.

It is not something one can "get over". It fades in time but it takes very little to bring it to the surface. I cannot see the pain etc being any different for a husband, wife or parents dying.

Sympathies, kitty. For a change, I was awake with a cough last night. I've had it for three weeks and it wasn't funny with a cracked rib, I can tell you! I thought it was getting better - until last night.
Better luck tonight!

Nannytopsy My daughter-in-law wears a mask to sleep in. She has sleep apnoea. Is that the condition from which your husband suffers?

Maw "A bit of a shadow over Christmas"... Had I uttered those words, I would have had to go lie down in a dark room and hide away for a bit.

Synonymous Life can be a bit of a buggeration, that's for sure. All that you can do is...go with the flow and eat if you can lay your hands on some. I'm still looking.

kitty and any of our Granspals who are feeling under the weather - conserve your energy and let Nature do the rest.

The GP asked how I was keeping. I told him the truth. I'm running on empty. My energy levels are zapped. He said that was to be expected. I had read that this reaction creeps up on one after surgery. I thought, no, I'm different. Well, I'm not.

Ann you are a wonderful example to those of us who may, at some time, find we are having to deal with the complex emotions and coping routines that you are faced with.

N&G Languishing under the stairs together, not apart, would suit us.

Charleyg Many of us lot have a soft spot for Tara.

Maw words fail me.

Anneliese I will pm you

Some people just don’t get it do they Annsixty?
Paw died in November and an otherwise intelligent and nice enough acquaintance commented the following January “Oh dear, I expect that cast a bit of a shadow over Christmas” ! You could not make it up.

Hello my lovelies. Sorry to be a late-comer. Trip to surgery took a bite out of the morning. MacSporran's appoinment followed mine.
callgirl1 we said hello to David as we passed his final resting place. The view across the sea was tranquil.

Anneliese Stumble, tip-toe, dance into the kitchen. As long as you arrive, you are in a safe place and there will always be someone with whom to share your problems, fears and celebrations. That's a promise.
There have been many responses to your latest post. All very caring and wise. I would say, go with your husband's wishes. He needs to feel in control. For as long as he has the motivation to carry out such wishes, so be it.

Just what you need Synonymous
I am finding it is the little things that are getting to me.
I had a phone call this morning from someone who supposed I was feeling a lot better by now!!
I am actually realising what has happened, it has been unreal until now.
I have spent a lot ot of time on the phone this morning changing account numbers for DD which were still being paid out of my H's bank account which of course is frozen.
I have my own money but how people who dont get on I cannot imagine.
Many women of my generation never dealt with such things, but I am not typical of my generation.
It also helps to be computer savvy.
TOYA.

Smokie is very happy that spring has arrived and has gone walkabout once again overnight and has just returned for food and then to sleep in his comfy bed. Himself keeps asking him very loudly why he is sleeping and Smokie wakes up, understandably startled as am I, gives a protesting little miaow and snuggles back down. It is going to be a long day!

Good morning the kitchen! I am going to post this quickly so that it really is morning.

Sorry for those who cannot sleep when sleep is what is really needed. Himself let me sleep in this morning as he thought I needed it which, to be fair, I really did. However! ...... I was only just getting my clothes on when the man from the garage arrived to collect my car for service and then refused to take it as he said the tyres were illegal! What a saga has ensued! Himself managed to get out to look at the tyres and doesn't think there is an issue but since it has been flagged I am not allowed to drive it until the tyres are changed. Fun and games!

Rip van Winkle has been up for half an hour having slept for around 8 hours with only one trip to the loo. I may start sleeping lessons I think.

Tara was sleeping almost on my head so she was pleased when I moved. Yesterday I changed the brightly covered duvet cover and replaced it with a navy one on her bed but she is not interested in the bedroom she decided was her own any more.

Anneliese I think you were correct the first time stumbling into the kitchen, provided you did not knock anything over. Admittedly food does not survive long there so hungry mice have moved elsewhere.

I think trying to carry on normally is the only way to deal with a devastating blow like the one thrown at you both recently.

With my particular circumstances, I tell myself frequently it is a good job I am no longer working so, on the whole, do not have to worry about money.

It is a very difficult period for many. TOYA

Morning all !!

At last the sun has broken through and the rain has stopped. Its amazing how much difference a little sunshine can make to your mood.

Sorry to hear your cough woke you up Kitty , I seem to get left with a cough these days whenever I have been poorly. My daughter swears by pineapple juice, something about clearing your chest of mucus --yuk !! BUT if it helps , any port in a storm I say! Hope you feel better soon.

Glad sharing has helped Anneliese. I hope you and your DH can find a happy medium moving forward. It would be a shame to lose the good days to worry.

I'm sorry about your sister Anno , its at times like these that distance really does matter. My family are far flung and so I feel your pain.

Ah Nannytopsy we had this very discussion with our daughters recently. One wont discuss it at all and the other is far more pragmatic. We didn't really come to any conclusions but I think I am leaning towards being scattered on a hill top overlooking my home town where my Mum and Dad and Nan and Grandad are also scattered. BUT I think as that scattering is really for the benefit of giving the girls a 'place' to go they should choose.

I know my Mum struggled with the same thing and Nan and Grandad languished under the stairs for years LOL !!

I'm hoping to get outside today but that will depend on Grampy's back. Isn't it amazing after a long career that meant I travelled extensively internationally on my own he now thinks I cant drive to the next village without him :-(

If I'm not back by tonight..... send help :-) ( and cake !!)

Popped in to see if kitty was any better and find that you have had to seek help over the weekend, hope they gave you something to help.
Thinking of all with problems.

Well, I woke myself up coughing so no-one else to blame! I managed to make a pot of tea (do I get a medal?) Its on the side along with some toast.

I think it would depend on how much of Topsy's rhubarb gin you've had as to whether you stumble onto, or into, the kitchen. I bought dh rhubarb gin for Christmas but he hasn't started it yet.

This period is going to be very difficult for you anneliese so please talk to us when you need to.

ann (((hugs)))

anno, it must be so sad to be apart from your sister.

TOYA