Drinking alone ...

I'd rather have a cup of tea and a fag !

Hi everyone, thank you for this interesting topic. I feel quite envious of you all that can drink socially. Unfortunately that is not for me as I am a recovering alcoholic and have been sober for 20 years. It does not help to drink alone as I did a lot of the time. If you have a problem with drink and want a drink you won't care where or when or what time of the day it is. I notice a couple of you have alcoholism in your family and have the sense to be aware. Alchololism is an illness I never woke up one morning when I was young and said guess what when I grow up I want to be an alcoholic. My heart goes out to Buster Tank's mother in law I hope she gets the help she desperately needs. Alcoholics Anonymous keeps me sober and I have a good life today.

BusterTank I think your mother in law needs help - do you think she drinks because she is lonely or depressed? Has anyone actually sat down with her (when sober) and asked her why she drinks? Don't ask in an accusing way as she will just get defensive, say you are concerned for her and her health.

I live alone so don't have a choice. I rarely go out but sometimes I just fancy a drink with my evening meal and don't even think about it as drinking alone, just enjoying the odd drink

I had a friend who lives in France. Feeling generally unwell she went to see her elderly doctor who asked her how much wine she drunk a day. She told him three glasses, about half a bottle. Well no wonder you don’t feel well he told her. You should be drinking a whole bottle! She took his advice and has felt fine ever since. Don’t think I could manage it though......

No hope for me then.....

One day I suddenly failed to see the point in drinking alcohol and stopped - that was 10 years ago now.

Just after that I went to my son's wedding and wondered why do people drink? I was perfectly okay - in fact better - without one.

Alcohol is a depressant anyway and has many side effects which are only just coming to light and the ideal limit for alcohol consumption is now none!

Try going without and maybe you'll see what I'm trying to explain which is the pointlessness of its effects.
xx

I recently came across the idea of “addiction” as ‘over use of a coping strategy’ which I thought was a really helpful way of looking at any overuse of any ‘habit’ which creates negative consequences. Could be anything - booze; drugs; gambling; cleaning; hobbies. Main thing is, whatever we do, we are able to stop when we want to and it doesn’t have adverse consequences in our lives. Can’t say I’m, personally, worried about doing too much housework!

I don't drink normally - just don't like the taste (and it aggravates my stomach probs), but last week I had a glass and a half of champagne, and I must admit I felt pretty good after it! So, if I ever start to drink, it's got to be champagne all the way.

My husband was on hospital for surgery and 3 day stay. We live 2 hour car journey away so I stayed in nearby hotel for ease of visiting etc. Second night I was shattered, hotel was quiet and I didn't fancy being in room watching tv until bedtime. Treated myself to G&T and it did help me relax in a quiet atmosphere and the staff did chat to me. I wasn't drinking alone, others were around albeit not consuming alcohol.

Yes do it every Saturday night, love it.

Never been a problem for me to drink alone. It’s ok as long as doesn’t become a habit.

Thanks for the smiles on this subject... and the reminders of how an addictive personality can take things to extremes too. I can enjoy a G&T, especially on a Friday evening to kick the weekend off., but i can just as easily enjoy a soft drink alone or with friends. Cheers xx

Goodness! Gransnetters are certainly giving the lie to current tales about drinking epidemic in the older generation! Feeling totally guilty now. My DH and I have a predinner drink (G&T or similar) while preparing the meal. We also have a bottle of wine with the meal, which lasts us 2 evenings, ie we drink 1/4 of a bottle each per day. We are never drunk, never drink and drive, never hungover etc. But we've worked hard all our lives , and been very thrifty, and are finally in a position with a bit of spare money. Both dislike eating out so we eat well at home and enjoy the luxury of having a nice drink. As for drinking alone, if either of us is out or away the other one carries on as normal, just the bottle of wine lasts 4 nights, not 2!

I do like a glass of nice red wine - not French but Australian/New Zealand/South African varieties. I probably buy two to three bottles a month and am quite happy to sit watching a film or read a book on my own whilst sipping away. I rarely buy a glass of wine when out as they charge silly prices and the quality is often dubious. Like my DD I usually order a pint glass of soda and lime.

I'm with you Nanasuzy We're the same. We have a couple of drinks in the evening. We enjoy it. DH is 73 and I am nearly 70. We've also worked hard all our lives. As for drinking alone, the 'drink police' have made us feel guilty for years. If you have the odd drink alone, you are not an alcoholic. It's ridiculous. I've long since stopped listening to such rubbish.

Sounds good to me NanaSuzy! Carry on enjoying it, you deserve it. It doesn’t sound at all excessive to me.

If your sitting alone in a darkened room, with a bottle of something your drinking alone, if you h has gone to bed, having a shower/shave etc. Your drinking but some one else is around.i often drink on my own h doesn’t always want one.

I don’t know why, but a glass of wine really lifts even the simplest food. Cheese and crackers minus wine= meh, but with a nice glass of wine it becomes, if not a meal, at least an interesting snack. I think of Elizabeth David, who revitalised post-war English cooking, and her book “An omelette and a glass of wine.” And we always start our holidays at the bistro on St Pancras station with a glass of champagne and smoked salmon, and I have still done that when I have been travelling alone.

Isn't the advice that a glass of red wine is good for you - or has that changed again?

That last sentence DoraMarr sounds absolutely delightful- perhaps that’s the key for me - to make an occasion of it!

I've noted that quite a few of you write that
'I've/we've worked hard all my/our life/lives'
'after a hard day at work'
'a quiet drink'
'a nice bottle of wine' ...
as if making excuses for drinking alcohol.
Since when did we become a nation of wine drinkers ?
Not so very long ago, the average person only drank at Christmas, NY, parties or going out.
Now it's routine if the majority on here are a reflection of the trend.
A drink whilst making dinner and two at the table.
Let's hope that, if you got an emergency call from a relative, a taxi would be your mode of transport.

If people need wine or a G&T to wind down after 'a hard day at work, I wonder how our mothers and grans coped and I wonder too, if those who are on tablets (as are many on here) still imbibe regardless.
Here's me thinking that, in 2019, our working lives were made much easier with all the kitchen and household aids we take for granted, the technology at work plus cars to transport us there and back.
Life must, contrary to what I believed, be a grind and an effort for most people.
That's sad

I never need a drink, I just enjoy having one.

When I was in my 20s, a G&T after work and/or before a date, was my usual tipple. However, I've never since then enjoyed drinking on my own, except for one period when I had been told that red wine would reduce my cholesterol. It didn't. I do take a glass socially, but don't enjoy alcohol as I did 50 years ago.

Gabriella Having a drink is, for some, an enjoyable occasion. It is not "needed". If wine (or whatever) was not available we would still be able to "cope", we would still be able to enjoy our lives. What is sad is your need to condemn anyone who doesn't agree with your philosophy of complete abstinence