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What our parents did that we wouldn't dare to...

(101 Posts)
sarahcyn Fri 22-Feb-19 11:01:59

I'm inspired by the thread about sitting in the cinema through the film until the point "where we came in".
My mother says she "used to" (well, she probably did it once, she does exaggerate) take my brother, then aged 3 or 4, into the Cartoon Cinema in Soho - yes, Soho in the early 1960s - and leave him there, happily watching cartoons on his own, while she went shopping.
Nobody said anything, nobody thought it was a strange thing to do...or at least, that's what she thinks :-)

Witzend Sun 24-Feb-19 09:10:14

Ha, madmum, when my first baby was no more than 10 days old, I went shopping with my mother, arranging to meet her later at X o'clock outside a particular shop.

I rolled up at the right time - to be met with my mother's horrified face. 'Where's the baby??'

I'd left her in her pram in Boots, having completely forgotten that I had her!
Luckily it was only for 5 or 10 minutes, and nobody had twigged.
Daughter (now 41) still finds this hilarious.

nanababs Sun 24-Feb-19 08:33:14

Ah, happy days! Pushing neighbour’s babies to the local park in their prams, with many stops to rearrange them or the covers and pillows. Walking to infant school alone or with a friend picked up on the way. Being deposited on the overnight train to Kings X which arrived before the tube stations opened, so having to hang around until I could get the first train to Greenford where my auntie lived! I was 9/10!
We all recognised the sleazy man on his bike who’d then stand half in/out the toilets in the park showing his ‘wares’! He wasn’t the only one either.

Baloothefitz Sun 24-Feb-19 00:55:12

How awful for your poor friend Saracyn, yes some children did exactly what adults told them to do to their detriment. That's why I have always said there should never be secrets between grown ups & children .
I do remember leaving my firstborn outside the shops in late 70s in her Silver Cross pram & not worrying at all. Also putting her out in front garden in said pram after early morning feed for a long snooze in the fresh air.I wouldn't dream of doing the same with my grandson.

Longdistancegrnny Sun 24-Feb-19 00:01:21

Aged 6 I was taken to The Tower of London by my 11 year old cousin for the day! My mum and Aunty had a days shopping in the West End. When I was 10 I used to get the bus to my sister’s house (3 or 4 miles away) and collect my 2 year old niece, bringing her back to my Mum’s on the next bus. I babysat for my sister’s two girls when I was 12. My Dad used to smoke his pipe in the car, although it made me car sick, sometimes he would not stop, I just had to wind the window down and stick my head out!
When my kids were small in the early 80s, I would leave DD asleep in her cot at midday and collect DS from playgroup - it was only round the corner, and she always slept for 2 hours! They are horrified to hear this story, it was probably a bit irresponsible of me ?. When I put them to bed at night I would read a story, tuck them in and kiss them, then shut the door and go downstairs (quite a big house) and get on with my evening, no baby monitor, I don’t remember rushing up to check them at all, I would just check them when I went to bed....they all survived! Still I must have done something right as DD is always happy to leave me in charge of DGCs.

grannybuy Sat 23-Feb-19 23:40:22

On a very rainy day, our schools closed at lunchtime. We were sent home without any contact with parents. Who knew if anyone would be in the house? There would be uproar now if that happened. I came home to an empty house from about the age of nine, and in the winter had to light the paraffin heater. I can also remember trying to make fudge when I was in on my own, which, of course would be scalding. I got up to all sorts, without my parents knowing. They really were taking risks. I was told never to take anyone in ( having said that, I was host to the insurance man and the tick man who came weekly when I was on my own ). One day, my mother came home to find a very unkempt boy sitting with his very grubby feet in a basin of water while I sewed holes in his socks. I had taken him under my wing as I felt sorry for him. She was not amused, but it was a result of being left on my own so much.

GreenGran78 Sat 23-Feb-19 23:20:52

About 30 years ago I heard a banging on the door one evening, and found my neighbours' three young children, wet and shivering in their pyjamas. Dad had been left at home, babysitting, and had nipped off to the pub, which was just up the road. They had woken, panicked to find themselves alone, and ran to me.
I guessed where he had gone, and my DH went to retrieve him while I warmed the kids up.
I didn't 'snitch' on him, but the children did, and he got an earful from his wife!

PECS Sat 23-Feb-19 22:53:04

Only the other day a friend was regaling us with the day her mother sent her with her older sister to stayvwith granny for a holiday. Granny was in Woolwich. Sisters were put on a train at Clapham Junction , got off at Waterloo and then bussed and walked to Granny who was furious they had beenb sent alone. Not even a house phone to check if they arrived! 1955!!

madmum38 Sat 23-Feb-19 22:51:59

Wouldn’t swap my childhood with the ones the children have now, computer friends more than real ones and so much worry around that they don’t have the same freedom

SylviaML Sat 23-Feb-19 21:18:35

My friend and I used to babysit for her 2 sisters and brother whose ages were about 7, 5 and 1. Not too unusual, but we were only about 10 years old ourselves. Would definitely not be allowed now but it seemed perfectly natural to us and I can't remember anything awful happening.

Urmstongran Sat 23-Feb-19 21:02:50

Ha! Love that Granless!
What dad could do that now without getting hauled up by social services?
Is that why we now think we live in a nanny state?
Just listen to the weather forecasts when they say ‘wrap up warm’

Urmstongran Sat 23-Feb-19 20:58:28

I’ve loved reading all these stories! Thank you so much ladies and to OP who started the thread - great topic!
OMG I’m surprised some of us are still here to tell these tales!a
Although we were a bit scared of what we’d been tasked to do in our childhoods, later, with hindsight, I do think it’s made us stronger and more resilient.
Do others think so too?

Lily65 Sat 23-Feb-19 20:56:19

Left in charge of a 7 year old ( I was 9) in a strange town with a sixpence. Fun times.

sodapop Sat 23-Feb-19 20:54:21

My children were left outside in their pram in all weathers except fog, it was considered healthy. I used to spend whole days out on my bike with friends in the school holidays. We took a packed lunch and cycled all around the local area. It's a great shame those freedoms have gone.

Granless Sat 23-Feb-19 20:50:47

When I was a young girl (1957 aged 10) my dad used to take me to the pictures on a Sunday early evening. When the film had ended, about 7pm, he would put me on the bus home and he then would go to the pub.

lmm6 Sat 23-Feb-19 20:28:46

Everyone’s experiences should be put into a book.
When I was 9 my friends and I got the bus to the nearest city (4 miles) to watch Saturday morning cinema. My brother,aged 5, came with us. One day I left him behind in the city by mistake. A kind lady found him wandering and fortunately he could tell her where he lived. She put him on the bus in charge of the driver who brought him home! Imagine that now!
My DD thinks I make up these stories. She can’t imagine a 50s childhood and doesn’t really believe the freedom we had. I wouldn’t have missed it for anything. Life was (generally) better then.

Cambia Sat 23-Feb-19 17:54:32

I used to take my two sisters aged 5 and 7 on the train to the next town and go swimming with them. I was only 9 and couldn’t swim! Can you imagine that happening today. Just fortunate none of us drowned!!! We did have a lot of common sense then though!

cassandra264 Sat 23-Feb-19 17:45:23

My mother in the fifties would leave me aged three and my then eighteen month old brother alone and unsupervised in the garden. He got out one day ( I was being looked after elsewhere that day ) through a hole in the hedge, and was brought back from the busy main road twenty-five yards away by a kind lorry driver who had screeched to a halt just in time.The driver scooped him up and brought him back - there were only six houses on our lane and we were surrounded by fields - so fortunately it was not difficult to work out where the toddler had come from.......

Carolpaint Sat 23-Feb-19 17:09:51

I too left my baby in the pram outside a shop, there would be several prams. However does anyone remember the Scandinavian mother just a few years ago that was arrested for doing the same outside a cafe in America? I think they charged her with neglect and were surprised when she said it was normal in her country. Also we all were encouraged for the fresh air to put our sleeping babies out in the garden inside their prams, probably blue lips were character building.

Happysexagenarian Sat 23-Feb-19 16:47:26

My grandmother taught me to use her sewing machine when I was four. She explained in detail what would happen if I didn't follow her instructions exactly. I did and I've been sewing without accident ever since. It would probably be considered far too young these days.

My Mum smoked all the time at home even when she was cooking. My grandfather also smoked a pipe and we had open coal fires. No wonder I have asthma!

Even before I started school I was often sent to the local shop with a bag and the money wrapped in the shopping list. I could just about reach the counter to hand it over. But I didn't have to cross any roads.

I remember my grandfather sending me to the hardware store at the far end of the road for a bottle of Spirits of Salts to clean the toilet. The lady in the shop said I must never ever open the bottle which had just a cork in the top. Apparently it was poisonous, caustic and very dangerous. When GF poured it into the toilet there was a fizzing sound then a huge explosion, and when the loo was flushed it was sparkling clean! This was an annual ritual in our house. I also remember being sent to buy DDT insect spray every Spring and then spraying the mattresses and under the beds which we then slept in that night. I can still remember the smell.

I used to light the fire in the living room every Saturday morning holding a newspaper in front of it to make it draw.

From the age of twelve I would buy a Red Rover ticket and travel all over London on my own in the summer holidays. Mum was at work.
In the 1990s I worked in a suburban secondary school and I was shocked at how many 15-18 year olds could not read an Underground map or a bus timetable and had never been into central London. They were ferried everywhere by car.

I too left my babies outside shops in their pram in the late 70s/early 80s. It was too big to go through the doors of many small local shops.

Hellsbelles Sat 23-Feb-19 16:21:37

When I was about 10 ish I was allowed to go on the bus to my local town, walk through it crossing a few major busy roads to go to Saturday morning cinema, all with my friend and neighbour who was younger then me by a year .

David1968 Sat 23-Feb-19 15:48:17

From age eight I took the bus to school by myself. This was two buses each way to primary school. (Because we'd moved house, but I couldn't settle at the new school, so I returned to my previous school.) Then from age eleven, I took three buses - again each way - to secondary school. At weekends I sometimes went to afternoon cinema showings, on my own. I don't remember thinking anything of this, at the time!

Hollycat Sat 23-Feb-19 15:47:43

Hi inishowen, My father was very ill when I was nearly seven and I was sent from London to Leicester to stay with my mothers older sister who I had never met before. My mother took me by bus to St Pancras, a label was attached to my coat and I was handed over to the guard to be minded. When I got there a lady who looked a bit like my mother came to the guards van, read my label and took charge of me. She and my uncle turned out to be very nice, but it was a very long time to be away. When the summer holidays finished, the journey was undertaken again with my mother meeting me at St Pancras.

Grandma70s Sat 23-Feb-19 15:46:46

When we were on holiday in a small Suffolk town in the 70s, we sometimes left the children in the church while we went shopping or whatever. They would have been about 5 and 7. There were children’s books and things there to entertain them. We thought they were perfectly safe, but looking back, they probably weren’t. They were quite happy to be left.

My parents would never have done that.

Wobbles Sat 23-Feb-19 15:33:46

*Urmstongran
Remember the pub trips with my parents, four of us left in the car sharing a bottle of pop but having our own packets of crisps smile

Teacheranne Sat 23-Feb-19 15:22:28

I have lots of memories about growing up in the late 1950's.

Holidays on the Isle of Man when my sister and I sat on the back of my parents bikes and a trunk of luggage was send ahead. Sitting outside the pub with a packet of crisps while my parents were inside.

Going to family parties, being put to bed then carried through the streets by tipsy relatives back to our own house. My grandma using my free orange juice that was given to allyoung children to sneak into her gin at the pub.

I was allowed to play out on my bike for hours. I remember when I was 7 or 8 that my favourite game was to cycle for miles, getting totally lost by randomly turning left or right at each road junction. I always managed to find my way home though.

I actually allowed my own children a lot more freedom in the 1990's than many of their friends had, we had a touring caravan and they played out on their own around the campsite for hours, only coming back when they were hungry!