Would you ask?

If you don't wish to discuss the matter with your neighbour it's simply none of her business. End of conversation. How's the weather?

It's all in the way you were raised. I would never ask questions about how much things cost. However my husband just comes out and asks. Sometimes I'm mortified. He also thinks nothing of asking our children how much they earn!

Then if she says ' You must have some idea' respond that you prefer not to think aboput it until you know all the ins and outs of it all.

Yes, I find a jocular reply works every time. When asked about income 'not nearly what I deserve or am worth'. 'Why on earth would you want to know that?' has had some interesting responses. For commodities 'I don't remember. It'll be on a cc statement somewhere'. I can usually differentiate when someone is genuinely seeking guidance and would be more accurate then.

I wouldn't say 'I'm sorry but I am not going to tell you' - I would simply say 'I am not going to tell you', or counter with 'Why do you want to know that?'. There is no need for you to say you are sorry - I think this very curious person should be sorry for asking so many personal questions! I have a relative who is a little like this, and I just ignore any questions about what things cost. It hasn't stopped her asking from time to time but I never answer and just carry on with the conversation, and she doesn't seem to take offence - odd, isn't it?

My neighbour is exactly the same.
The day we moved into this house she came round & after telling me her name & the fact they had lived here for 20 odd years she promptly asked what my husband did & how much he earned! I was shocked. I told her he worked in computers & left it at that -big mistake as it happens as she is after him all the time to sort out the messes she makes on her laptop!
That was 1992- she is still just the same& I have been avoiding her as much as possible ever since!

Just say 'I don't know. There will be some adjustments as the work is being done I've been given to understand. there is always something not expected'.

I sometimes ask how much something like maintenance work costs but I always say "I hope you don't mind me asking but we're going to need to have that done too" and then I say "Thanks so much, that's really helpful." I wouldn't dream of asking how much pension somebody receives. That's just plain intrusive but your "friend" doesn't realise this. Have you ever asked her what her pension is - could be interesting to see her reaction? if she replies you can just say yours is a bit more or a bit less without giving an exact figure.

When asked how much things cost, my Aunt used to say “not as much as you would think”

I'm happy to pass on tradesmen et al costs if they are considering doing same. But if it's just noseyness it smacks of monitoring your finances.

Personal financial matters as in pension then I would reply 'that's between me and my bank account'.

My mother always had the perfect answer if anyone asked that “ if it was any of your business I would I would tell you, but it is not “ It could be considered a bit rude but then asking is a bit rude also

I wouldn’t dream of asking the price, although I would ask who’d done a job and if they’d recommend them if I was looking for a similar job to be done. Apart from that what something costs is no business of anyone other than the people paying out. If I wanted to check the fairness of a quote, I might say how much I’d been quoted and ask a friend if they thought it was a fair price.

Far too much . That's my usual answer to that question then quickly change the subject.

We had a large tree cut back in the summer and our next door neighbour asked how much. 2 days later he knocked on the door with cash for half the cost and insisted we had it, despite our refusal. He said it had made such a difference to his light levels!

Make a joke of it and just say " Ooooh, the earth " and if she repeats the question by saying "But how much exactly " just repeat the answer and laugh. Broken record.

Sorry the message re trigeminal neuralgia has been posted in the wrong place ...please ignore it

If she asks about your pension say, "Well, that's rather personal", and leave it at that. Change the subject. She should stop asking - if she doesn't repeat yourself.

Try my grandmother’s reply to such questions “money and fair words “

Does anyone suffer from trigeminal neuralgia? My gp has disgnosed it after I have been suffering awful jaw pains for 3 weeks that have reduced me to tears and my dentist confirmed it was not my teeth. Silly things can set the awful pain off such as a duvet just touching my chin or drinking a cup of coffee. It is v unpleasant and I am hoping the diagnosis is wrong and it may just go away as quickly as it came as I do not want to live on the prescribed anti convulsant tablets that seem to be the only thing to help with nerve pain.
I would like an MRI to confirm diagnosis and wondering if other sufferers had had one done and what dose of medication they are on and if it can go as quickly as it came!

Willow10 - if you don't feel comfortable discussing your personal finances or what you have paid for things then don't.

You could simply say "I never talk about financial matters to other people as I regard them as private" and your neighbour will soon get the message.

If she asks again (highly likely), say exactly the same thing or ask her why she needs to know. That will put her on the spot!

Asking how much some work in the house cost is not prying into your personal finances.
It's just working out what a ball-park figure might be for similar work.
If she asked you how much cash you had left over in your savings account - that WOULD be prying!

You could try and avoid telling her by say “oh you really dont want to know” or “more than I thought it would going to cost” or joke and say “well thats put and end to that nice dress I was going to treat myself to at the weekend” avoid telling her and hopefully she wont ask a second time.

I have a friend who wants to know what everything cost, all earnings and savings etc. This nosiness has come back to bite her because she agreed to be POA to another friend, mainly because she wanted to know the ins and outs of her bank balance but that friend has deteriorated, mainly dementia so this one is driving a fair few miles weekly to sort out meals of the week, drugs etc. She cannot get out of it.

It is not only wanting to know eg the number of premium bonds I have, but I then get a lecture on where my money should go. I now have short term memory loss for most things and with her, it works well.

She's not American is she? The ones I have known seen quite happy swapping details of their income etc, but there is no way I would reveal my personal financial details to anyone, that is definitely one step too far!

Yes GA horses for courses!
I used to have a very nosey neighbour and I felt a bit uncomfortable around her. She had been a store detective and her powers of observation were amazing.
It wasn't just how much did you pay but when did you buy that? She knew more about us than we knew ourselves.
We moved away and lost contact but she's still famous in our family. We later named a pet after her!!
Among our neighbours and friends we discuss the cost of all the various jobs. Someone just had a quote for £2000 for repairing a brick wall. We all thought that too steep.
Personal finances are another thing altogether.