As a teacher myself I always supported the school, certainly in front of the children, if my girls got into any scrapes..it did not happen often, but they knew DH &I would not blame the school. Nowadays there are a significant minority of families who defend their children right or wrong, forever challenging school systems etc. This is also done openly in front of children. This can drip feeds into the children so that the establishment/ authority is seen to be always wrong and not to be respected. This can confuse little children whose experience in school is often as a happy and safe place to be. Schools are not prefect I know but how we challenge or raise concerns makes a lot of difference!
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Taking baby for a walk
(31 Posts)When I was young it was very common for girls to knock on someone’s door and ask to take the baby out in the pram. Not strangers but neighbours. If there was a new baby in the road one or sometimes two quite young girls would be knocking. It was seen as acceptable. With hindsight it seems terribly risky. Does anyone else remember this practice?
I did this too. We really enjoyed it and the babies were fine. They were strapped in and we were told not to lift them out. People are much too cautious nowadays. My 15 year old gd is still taken to and collected from school for goodness sake. Most of my gc weren't allowed to play in the street. It's a very strange world. And Buffybee I think we have lost the neighbourliness. We looked out for each other then. And we had the informal social control of neighbours too. If a child misbehaved they knew a neighbour would tell them off and tell their parents. Try doing that now.
One of the pieces of advice my mother gave me in the 70's was 'Don't you ever let anyone else take your baby out in the pram...if anyone knocks and asks say no and shut the door' I thought this was rather odd but she told me that it used to be common practice for little girls to knock on doors and ask to take the baby out in the pram. She certainly wouldn't have allowed it but apparently harassed mothers with several children were only too pleased.
I recently read in my Dad's diary that they put me on a bus to school when I was 4 and a half but I didn't get off at the right stop so they (my parents) kept me at home for another term!
I have no memory of this incident but I felt alarmed for that little person who was me.
I do remember my DM telling me never to get into a stranger's car but I'd have been about 7 or 8.
I did it every Saturday and the mum was very grateful . I even think she asked my mum if I would do it . The baby was under a year old when I began and was walking by the time I stopped.
I was lucky because my two young step-children used to keep my two amused. I also trusted them to take the little ones on the sands or to the park but only if they wanted to as I wouldn't have just off-loaded them to get them out of my hair. To " put-on " older children is wrong in my eyes.
My friend and I always took neighbours babies for a walk when we came home from school we must have been 11/12 at the time,we would take the babies to the park and bring them back about 5pm when their mums had made the evening meal ,
Oh yes it was quite common to knock and ask to take the baby out; I remember doing it back in the 1950s. And I used to take a teacher's baby out every Saturday afternoon.
I used to walk to and from school on my own too from the second day when I had just turned 5. Four times a day as well, as we always went home for dinner.
Not the brightest of boys then Grammaretto!
I bet you raced back home.
Thank goodness your babies were good sleepers.
All these stories ring true with me too. The teens weren't always sensible though.
My neighbour invited me to a Tupperware party. I said I couldn't go as I had no babysitter. That's ok she said her 12 yr old son would come round.
At 9pm I noticed the boy was back home so I asked him if DH was back .
"No" he said "but you told me it would only be till 9 o'clock so I came home".
Oh dear. The babies were fine.
I think that you are probably right PECS, children these days do seem to be the centre of their parents Universe and rule the roost, so to speak.
A lot of today's parents are even loathe to chastise their children in any way.
Consequently, they feel that they can do no wrong and when they arrive in the real World, it comes as a shock to them.
I suppose we have created those snowflakes then Buffy
Oh yes I agree *GrandmaKT, most of the kids these days have been brought up with "kid gloves on", I'm sure that we were much more capable and sensible in those days at a very young age.
That is probably why we have the whisper snowflake generation.
I do think we seem to have lost the balance of a carefree childhood/ independence/ molly coddling!
My DDs went to and from school in Sth London without adult supervision from about 9yrs old.. they met friends en- route all walked in a group. A couple of busy roads to cross but traffic light controlled.
DGD1 has been going to and from school independently since Y6 and DGS1 now does the same. DGD2 Y5 walks so far with a group friends and I drop her/ meet her part way. DGD1 is also allowed to go into town with friends at the weekend. They like to go for a smoothie or hot chocolate in the café! It is hard to get it right but DGD1 has a class mate who is escorted everywhere by mum. Poor girl , DGD1 says she is a bit left out because all the others in the friendship group chat to and from school which this girl misses out on.
That's right Buffybee, there was less traffic then, but that can't be all that has made the difference. To go from children walking to school on their own at 4 to a family I know who won't let their 14-year-old walk to school on his own!
I started school at the age of 4 GrandmaKT and also walked to school on my own and back after the first day.
I walked a couple of streets and then crossed by a Lollipop Lady outside school.
It was a bit different in those days though as there were not so many vehicles on the road and they also did not drive as fast.
It does seem crazy when I look back that at only just 4 in the June, I walked to school in the September.
I can't remember being scared or anything, it was just normal.
I wonder why it is that children seem to have lost so much common sense? As many have said, they wouldn't dream of letting a 10-year-old look after a baby now, but a couple of generations ago it was the norm.
My DIL was horrified recently when I told her that, after the first day when my mum took me, I used to walk to school and back (crossing a busy main road with a pedestrian crossing) from the age of 5.
Is it our fault for not giving them responsibilities?
my 13yr old DGD goes to her neighbour to play with her little boy ( 4) so mum can work from home..just a couple of hours and in another room!
God sounds a million miles away from my experience as a young mum in 1989. No way would I have left my babies with a teen.
Sad really we seem to have lost the feeling of community?
From the age of about 11 (about 1962) I took the babies of both of the next-door neighbours out in their prams. We usually went around the block but I remember taking one in his push-chair visit my aunt a mile or two away. I often played with them in their homes and gardens or in ours.
I don't think I'd have let an 11-year-old take my child out - in the 80s - let alone now.
I don't know if it's just me looking back with "rose coloured spectacles" but do you think that neighbours were more friendly is those days ?
My Street felt like one big family and I called all the other women in the Street Auntie Jane, Auntie Edi etc., and could knock and just walk in most of their houses.
They all seemed to "look out" for all the children on the Street, as their own.
When I think about it though, it was probably because hardly any of the women worked.
Happy times!
I baby sat my single neighbours kids for years from about the age of 9 and she had 4 of them! I used to sleep over and she was often out all night, it was the done thing I guess, I baby sat for almost everyone in our street with little kids at some stage or another, would never imagine it now a days would you!!
Just the same for me at the same age buffybee, but we were allowed to take the baby to the park! One of my teachers from infant school, an older mum, lived in the next street, when I was in the junior part of the school I used to go to the house and play with her small children to give her a break. I can’t imagine that happening either these days!
Yes, I used to do the same. I'm sure I was only about 8 or 9 and could hardly see over the handles of the big coach built prams.
Most of the Mum's used to say, as long as you stay on the Street and dont take the baby out of the pram. Even so it was a bit dangerous as the Street was very steep.
Still, I can't remember any accidents and when the babies were a bit older we used to hold their hands and walk them up and down.
Oh yes. I've mentioned this on GN before. Me and my friend used to knock doors where we knew there was a baby and ask to take it out. We can only have been about 10. We only wanted cute babies with posh prams. Some of these mums didn't know us from Adam. We used to take the babies to the park. Unbelievable really.
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