The Great North/South Divide

I have found though, that the friendliest people seem to live in Wiltshire.I expect we all have our own versions though as to who we have found to be the friendliest.

My Sil comes from Wiltshire ,he tells me he and his next door neighbour had never spoken and they lived next door to each other for 18 years.
Now he call his Argyll home his little piece of heaven,knows everyone and speaks much more to folk than he would have ever believed before he came here.Its a very multicultural area and most are what someone upthread called "seperatist" .not so ,just people who want to control their own country .You know, like the English ,who have always run their own affairs .( even in the EU)

Just thinking of ‘neighbours’ up and down our road. In the corner are a family from ‘up north’ who won’t even catch you eye. One from Inner London who is always up for a chat. Both next door neighbours are locals and perfectly friendly. A little further along , are couples and families from Dorset, Northumberland and Scotland. These always acknowledge others . Different people, different characters, nothing to do with where they come from.

I thought you may have a story like that Paddyann

Looked at objectively in fact, your SIL is just as much to blame as his neighbour in not speaking for 18 years.

Wiltshire? Where you can't go anywhere without someone stopping for a chat?
in fact can't shut them up sometimes

mind you, lemongrove, the two neighbours may have arrived in those UFOs seen over Wiltshire many years ago …..

Different people, different characters, nothing to do with where they come from.
Absolutely Ginny

Jalima

www.bbc.co.uk/wiltshire/moonraking/spooky_ufo.shtml

I would be wary paddyann
In fact, be afraid, be very afraid …...

My friend moved to Wiltshire from the south east and has found loads of people talk to her. She enjoys a life free from religious sectarianism. Her magnanimous Druid neighbours know she is partial to a bit of worship at the Temple of Mithras from time to time, but not a curse passes their lips when she passes their door all togad up. If only it were so in other parts of Britain ....sigh!

You could be right about the wrong bit of down south, Jalima! We did a tour of the West Country a couple of years ago and met lots of lovely, chatty people.

I guess I was thinking more of where my son lives, to the west of London. I stayed with him for over two weeks due to illness in his young family. By the end of two weeks, I was going mad with the lack of contact with other people! No one spoke in the street or in shops or parks. I was told by my son that it's not the done thing to chat to checkout assistants as it holds up the queue!

Chippenham .I dont know it never been there so I wouldn't know.Just repeating what I was told.He travels all over the UK and Europe in his job so he's quite a sociable man I cant imagine him not wanting to speak to folk .His parents are quite self contained though,they find our family life quite difficult apparently we all "fight for airspace" ,think they mean we all talk a lot .

I think he was just unlucky with his next door neighbour!

When I moved to the South-west, *SueDonim, I was quite startled to be addressed by strangers as 'me luvver'.
No, I am not 'your lover' - I am used to being addressed as 'duck'!

I have made more 'local' friends in the 8 years since moving out of Sth London and into small town Surrey.
I was working f/t then so did have work mates . Had AC so little opportunity to engage with other parents living locally. Too busy evenings and weekends to commit to clubs or societies. Was on friendly chatting , cat-feeding terms with a few neighbours but not mates! I also have an established group of friends that I still socialise with but they were never local to me. Since being here, being a p/t worker, taking DGC to school & having time in the day and evenings to go out to local events I have met half a dozen new women friends .. we have become good pals & have even been on a holiday together! I do not think it is always to do with where you are but more the time you have and your own 'personality' to get out there and find opportunities to meet people!

I think you get that defence mechanism in most parts of the country, lemon. We lived for three years in an Essex village and they were pretty good at keeping incomers at arms length, but it was less about being from another part of the country than about being a service family from another part of the country. But I found work locally, as did a few of us, and we steadily broke down barriers. I was even invited to join the WI ? (though not until we were almost packed and ready to move out!). I still have contact with a couple of friends I made there.

I've lived in many different places, here and abroad. There were kind people everywhere, some places more reserved.
I think my feeling for Tyneside is that I feel 'at home' here.
It's partly the history, the local accent , familiarity etc.
Whereas I never had that feeling in the other places.
So it's not so much the N/S divide, as living near my roots.

Jalima someone addressed my Dh as 'my lovver ' when we were in Kings Lynn. It's the one and only time we've been there so I don't know if it's a common expression in the area, or maybe the woman was an incomer from the West Country!

this was a man who filled up my car with fuel! Never met him before (as far as I could remember!).

By the end of two weeks, I was going mad with the lack of contact with other people!
We lived in the West of London for a few years SueDonim and I know what you mean. It takes time, but it's possible to make friends eventually. Our neighbours were lovely but all out at work and very busy.

I think it is also a question of whether you have chosen the right neighbourhood for you, regardless of region.

At one point we lived in a very pleasant friendly neighbourhood, nice neighbours, but no one really on our wave length. Then we moved house, about 10 miles into a different type of area, more socially mixed, more alternative and loved it there and made good friends.

The latest edition of the Spectator has an article about this week's Question Time audience which apparently was rude to Diane Abbot. The writer of the article assumed that the whole audience was working class because they lived in/near Derby which many would not consider north. Some of us from north of Watford are quite comfortably off thank you.

As an Aussie travelling in the UK I am always amused by the massive signs on the motorways saying 'The North' and 'The South' as though they were different countries. People we meet in The North assure me that they are much friendlier than people in The South and people in The South tell me that I'll find people in The North less welcoming. Of course the reality is that we meet lovely, helpful and interesting people in The North and The South and even in The East and The West.

Regarding choosing the right neighbourhood - we chose what we could only just afford in London but it did prove to be the right neighbourhood - eventually. People are generally not as forthcoming there imo, but you can make good friends in time.