Just a thought about Round Robins

I got in touch with a friend I hadn't seen since the seventies. She talked all about her family, and even her daughter's mother in law came into it. At the end of the phone call she asked if I'd had any children. I said we had a daughter and was about to say a son as well. She barged in, "oh you just had a daughter, like me". I had not been able to tell her anything about how life had been for me since the seventies. Sadly I never contacted her again.

I still send and receive Christmas letters to/from people I never see. I like to read them and see what's happening. In mine, I try not to brag but like to say what I've been doing.
I try to make them a funny/self-deprecating if possible. Don't knock it completely some people like it.

We get one of these from someone we no longer see. Perfect life, children apparently. Expensive holidays in exotic places, perfect health. I would never assume that anyone is remotely interested in my life.

Love it Sue I will send one from my dogs.

SueD, do I have your permission to change the animal and send it to my nutty dog loving friend?

SueDonim that was hilarious!
We usually get a masterpiece of the genre from people who only live a couple of miles away. Full of details of their annual safari, children’s home extensions etc. They didn’t send one this year and we feel quite disappointed.?

I admit I do send them, hopefully not boasty ones and only to people that I contact at other times of the year. I like receiving them too but all my friends are lovely and I’m interested in their lives. It’s always too hectic to do individual ones at Christmas.
This year I just sent copies of the 12 days of Christmas by John Julius Norwich. Hope it makes them smile.
Thank you for the link Jalima.

I hold up my hand and admit I put short letters in 2 cards this year - one to a friend who for various reason I haven't seen for over 12 months and one to my uncle giving him news of my mother (his last remaining sister), neither were boasting (or contained photos) - just passing on news.

I'm jealous i dont get any!!!

I have severely cut back on sending Christmas cards this year. It irritates me when there is just a good wishes and name from someone I only hear from annually. It virtually says I’m still here.

I used to send a RR to distant friends and add a written portion at the end. I then realised from threads like this that generally people frown upon them, so I stopped.

I do however send animated ecards and newsy (not showing off) emails to friends.

To be honest I would much prefer to send none at all, other than to people living on their own, and give a donation to charity. If I suggested this to DH he would think I had turned into a right old Scrooge. Rant over.

I always look forward to a few lines from a lifelong friend of 70 years !. Yes, we lived next door to one another from the early '40's and she still lives in the same house with her husband.

We've exchanged Birthday and Christmas cards every year as well as postcards from various holiday destinations. I send and also receive cards from her brother and sister too as we all played together as kids enjoying a happy childhood.
We still live our childhood in our letters and it's lovely looking back.

Surely RR just reflect the friend who sent it to you. If they normally brag about things, their RR will be in the same vein. If they normally share the highs and lows of life the RR will be similar. It is surely good to celebrate the Joys of a friends life and share and empathise with their sorrows.

Maybe I'll send a RR from my cats this year.

'Dear friend,

This past year has pretty much followed the format of last year - and the one before that. We arise each morning to a bowl of Hills Science diet followed by a visit to the 'facilities', which gives our staff something to keep them occupied, and then we settle down for a morning nap. That may last until lunchtime, or as on one memorable day, eight marvellous hours of shut-eye. That was surely a red-letter day, a highlight of our year!

After munching on a dinner of biscuits we like to exercise our staff by getting under their feet, in the hope of causing them to fall, preferably fatally, so that they can be replaced with more respectful workers. We do believe in recycling so we'd eat their bodies first, of course.

A post-prandial nap is in order then until bedtime, when we have our nightcap of Dreamies. That settles our stomachs and fortifies us for the eight hour shift of sleep to come.

As ever, we went on our annual foray abroad, when we travel to see a gentleman known only by his initials, V. E. T. I don't know why we persist in visiting him as he really has appalling manners, poking us with needles and forcing a purge for worms down our throats. Worms!! As if pedigrees such as ourselves would stoop so low.

And so the order of our days go by. We wish you much of the same for this festive season and in 2019,

Yours as ever,

Fish-Breath & Kitty-Litter.

I love reading all the letters or emails I receive. They are not all bragging. Several last year told of illness, bereavement, divorce, as well as holidays. It is far better than just a signed card and no news.

I totally agree.

I get about six every year with my Christmas card greetings, and I'd miss them if I didn't get them. They are mostly from old friends who have moved far away and I enjoy hearing how they and their now grown up children are getting on. They talk of achievements and lovely moments, but also of sorrows and difficulties.

I feel honoured that they share with me.

In turn, I send mine to relatives and friends far away and when one year I didn't send the family news letter, I had several phone calls and texts asking if I was OK. One of the recipients wrote me a lovely letter to say she really missed the Christmas letter and she hoped service would be continued in the future.

I must be doing it right! I am sure my tales of woe (quite often) make the recipients feel a whole lot better about their lives!

Perhaps I am lucky that I don't have smug, boastful friends? I love receiving RRs.

One arrived today full of very detailed woes of the last year, not a positive word. I’d be more sympathetic if the letter wasn’t from a couple we have seen and spoken to regularly, we were involved in all this stuff as it happened and we thought had been supportive. I read the letter to the end before it went into the bin in case there had been progress of any kind, I was disappointed.

Thanks for your post with the links, dora. I poured myself a large glass of Waitrose finest Aldi's cheapest and had a good giggle.

I used to get a bragging one from an ex colleague which listed all the many achievements of their only son. From nursery school to the expensive private schooling, sporting prowess, captain of this, captain of that, the special tutoring for an expensive boarding school, the high expectations of a university degree etc.
Last one was an explanation that he had left university after one term as he couldn’t settle! They have stopped sending them now.

There was a whole paragraph about the dog they're going to look after when their DD travels the world in the New Year. I actually wondered if I should be reading it to our dogs who would have been impressed and wagged their tails enthusiastically because any bizarre behaviour on my part usually results in a treat to reassure them.

I suppose I don't really 'get' the relative's RR issue because both my parents were only children so there are no relatives apart from a cousin of my mother's in his 90's, who likes to get a round up from me. He never replies though, just tells my mum he likes hearing about the 'young folk'.

Yes, I agree Baggs, people need to be making better choices when it comes to friends

Ours is from a relative of DH SueDonim . You can’t exactly choose them can you ? I wouldn’t care but he isn’t interested in us at all, it’s just this one annoyingly long bragging RR every year. We send a card with a couple of lines ....

A funny thread ?
I don’t send RR’s ( possibly because I am a lazy blighter) but do receive about three usually, from friends who we don’t see often as they live hundreds of miles away.They aren’t boasty ones, they just pick out the highlights and lowlights of their year with a few photos..
The boasty ones do sound awful, dora your spoof one made me laugh.
One friend always says it will make a useful firelighter.

I can't stand round robins either. They are either bragging about their life style and family achievements or going into detail about their illnesses and operations.
Just send me good wishes and leave it at that. I do like getting cards though.

I do send a page of photos of our year (usually involving the DGCs!) with a few captions . They go to family we cannot see often or distant (but good) friends who are not on a FB private group & do not see the DGC. I always add a short handwritten letter on the back. I would not dream of sending to people who I did not otherwise communicate with!

Good luck ringing Nigeria, Notanan! We were lucky to have power and water there, let alone phone connectivity.

I actually don't like to phone people now, it seems intrusive, because you don't know whether it's convenient, especially if they have children. One of my AC never ever answers their phone and rarely returns a message so I don't bother call now . When I've stayed in their house, I've answered it to his MIL and she's always been astounded to hear a voice reply to her. We don't speak a common language so that's always fun, doing hand gestures to explain yourself on a phone.

But you never know if you'll meet up again in the future, do you? I was able to meet someone last year who I hadn't seen for over 25 years, for many reasons. We exchanged RR's for all those years and again, it was as though we had met just last week. Except she didn't look any older than she did 25years ago, while I did.