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By any other name

(92 Posts)
Redwitch Mon 26-Nov-18 11:26:04

Just wondering how many of us have a similar experience.

When number 2 son was in primary school I was summoned by his teacher for a “chat” one afternoon. So I sat in trepidation on the tiny chair whilst Miss towered over me on the edge of her desk.

Mrs Witch we have a problem with your son says she.
Oh dear says I, what’s the matter?

Insubordination! she announced . I asked her to elaborate and she told me that son constantly ignored her when she was addressing him.
Totally out of character I said.
I am thinking of excluding him for a few days she says.
Thinking that’s a bit extreme I said let’s call him in and speak to him, so off she goes to call him in from the playground and I hear “ Joseph, Joseph, JOSEPH, no responce JOSEPH WITCH and he duly trots across playground.
I knew exactly then what the issue was and took pleasure in telling her she was calling him by the wrong name, he is called Joe, not Joseph so only noticed her calling him when she used his surname.

Why is it if you have a long name people shorten it but if you have a short name they extend it?

gillyjp Tue 27-Nov-18 18:41:52

On the subject of shortening already short first names I think this takes the biscuit. My son's name is Iain forever being shortened, would you believe, to 'E'. Not by me I hasten to add! He's 43 for goodness sake.

jocork Tue 27-Nov-18 18:35:01

My DD is Rebekah but is generally known as Bekah. My DB once suggested calling her Boris too but thankfully it didn't catch on!
I work in schools and all the ones I know have on their computer systems the pupil's legal name then their preferred name as a separate entry, so this shouldn't be a problem. Maybe some teachers are too lazy to check.
I once had a pupil who told me she wished to be known as 'Fluffy'. I was reluctant but eventually complied as she was quite difficult if I used her actual name. She eventually grew out of it.
I also had a boss who's surname was Head. One Particularly rude student (who probably didn't know his name) called him a 'Dickhead' in response to being given a detention. His response was to simply say "I'm so glad my parents didn't name me Richard." The student didn't get it at all!

callgirl1 Tue 27-Nov-18 17:41:10

I`ve always been called by my middle name, but then in official letters or in hospital I get the first name, in hospital it took me a day or so to realise they were talking to me, especially when during the night for BP taking.
My eldest daughter is Lynne, we thought it couldn`t be shortened, but when she was old enough to play out with other kids, they immediately started to call her Linny pinny.

glammagran Tue 27-Nov-18 17:21:22

A long time ago, just before Christmas a contractor joined our department at work. His name was Mustafa Turkei. Of course everyone went round saying “Must have a turkey for Christmas”

grandtanteJE65 Tue 27-Nov-18 17:04:34

I was brought up to believe that it was very rude not to pronounce and spell a person's name correctly. Judging from this thread, so was everyone of our ages.

Perhaps this is one of the courtesies that have disappeared?

Baggs Tue 27-Nov-18 16:40:45

Minibaggs had a baby nickname that we were still using when she started at nursery school. Her name card had that on one side and her 'proper' first name on the other. Everyone at school called her by her nickname because I did and that's what she was used to. Two years later we moved house and she decided she wanted to be known by her proper name at school. We simply told the teacher this but said that they might hear us using the nickname.

None of this was ever a problem. Teachers who care will find out what needs to be known about a child.

Baggs Tue 27-Nov-18 16:36:59

I don't recall showing my kids' birth certificates to their schools.

eazybee Tue 27-Nov-18 16:35:26

It doesn't seem to happen so much now, but at one time people would give their child two christian names, call them by the second one, and expect you to know this. Why??

Children are registered in school by the names written on their birth certificate, so if the name is Joseph that child would be entered as Joseph in the school register, a legal document, and the teacher would address the child by that name before she got to know him. She would also make labels for drawers, name cards, coat pegs etc. in the holidays before term started, so if a child is unable to recognise an alternative form of his name it would help if the aggrieved parent notified the school office of the preferred way to address him, or perhaps went through the very difficult process of changing his given name.

So much easier to blame the teachers, though.

curlilox Tue 27-Nov-18 15:53:37

I have an unusual surname, which almost everyone gets wrong. When I was in hospital after my daughter was born, I was told by a nurse to collect a sample pot and fill it. There wasn't one with MY name on, but one with the usual wrong name. I was asked why I hadn't done my sample, so I said there wasn't a pot with my name on. I checked a while later and there were 2 pots, both with different wrong names. I had to go and spell out my name for them. Just as well I wasn't having an operation, I might have had someone else's operation by mistake. That nearly happened to one person I know. She almost had a hysterectomy by mistake! shock

minxie Tue 27-Nov-18 15:47:08

My boy was born. The midwife asked me his name. Ben I replied, off she trots with him. Hello Benjamin
Seriously. I’ve heard of names being shortened but not lengthened

Magsymoo Tue 27-Nov-18 15:44:08

When we got married, both for the second time, I kept my maiden name and use the honorific Ms. Both my husband and myself are happy with this as are our children. However, some of our friends and relatives can't seem to accept this and insist on calling us Mr &Mrs. followed of course by his surname. I find it infuriating especially if I also get called by his initial or even full mame as well!

NannyG123 Tue 27-Nov-18 14:57:42

Before I got married one of my best friends name was Jill, my name is Gillian but I call myself gill, it was very funny if we met 2 boys and they asked our names, and we both said gill, they thought we wad joking with them, and I used to say I'm Gill with a .G

kwest Tue 27-Nov-18 14:07:19

Perhaps something more bizzare is when parents look for very obscure and ungrammatical ways of spelling a child's name to be 'different'. Sadly the child and the parents are then forever 'judged' and not usually in a good way.

Lancslass1 Tue 27-Nov-18 13:57:55

Every year we got six Christmas cards from "Sue".
For the past few years we have only received five!
The trouble is we don't know which Sue has stopped sending a card as nowadays often there is no indication on the envelope from where the card was posted.
A Plea to all Susans.
Please either call yourself Susan or state your surname too.

Sheilasue Tue 27-Nov-18 13:54:57

My son was called Nicholas, but every one called him Nicky.
Even me and dh and d, I only said his full name when I was cross with him. Often wish he was still here so I could call him in for tea.

Blue45Sapphire Tue 27-Nov-18 13:33:39

My sister once had a boyfriend called Richard Head - we were young and innocent at the time (early 60s), and never realised...

pinkym Tue 27-Nov-18 12:59:20

My 34 year old DS was the worlds worst in primary school for shortening names. His best friend was Kenneth, called by all the other children and teachers "Ken" by my DS - "K"!

moggie57 Tue 27-Nov-18 12:38:40

Sorry stupid typing

moggie57 Tue 27-Nov-18 12:37:27

I get called wen. Or wend.i hate it.its WENDY i tell everyone.dknt call me those others names igs niy my name .grrrrrr

gulligranny Tue 27-Nov-18 12:31:34

I am Elaine; I've been Eekie, I've been just E, but only my (sadly deceased) BF could get away with Lainey.

My youngest granddaughter can't get her head round the fact that my name isn't actually Grandma ....

Grandma59 Tue 27-Nov-18 12:28:35

I have spent most of my life being changed into opposite sex. I am female called Lesley but people usually just spell it the man’s way of Leslie or being called Les which is also mostly a man’s name ?

Sparklecat1955 Tue 27-Nov-18 11:51:15

My Christian name is foolproof, but people have a real problem pronouncing my surname, even though it's said exactly as spelt. I never realise I'm being called at the doctor's surgery, and she always gives me a slightly pitying look when I suddenly jump up. I haven't plucked up the courage to correct her though!

madmum38 Tue 27-Nov-18 11:47:29

My son was christened Jamie but again and again people call him James, at one point he got so fed up he started using his middle name instead which was Simon so got the simple Simon jokes.
He is now known to most people as Jay

Jaycee5 Tue 27-Nov-18 11:43:39

My aunt's name was Chrissie which I think is a lovely name and was usually called Chris but I don't think I every heard her real name used.

Caledonai14 Tue 27-Nov-18 11:37:26

Half a century ago, our secondary school refused to shorten or soften anybody's first name. A huge thing was made of it in every new class at the start of every autumn term.

My class included two Janies (duly christened and legally registered as such) and it drove the teachers up the wall. Staff addressed the boys by surnames only, but they either had to spit out the friendly sounding name Janie or put Miss in front of the surname.

Needless to say, the Janies weren't often picked to speak, no matter how often their hands went up. Except in French class where we were all addressed by the nearest French equivalent and the teachers were too busy trying to persuade us that inanimate objects were masculine or feminine ... I never really grasped that concept. Wonder how the Janies got on?