Ideas please to politely/effectively refuse unwanted hugs?

Hate it. I was brought up a Presbyterian.

Family & close friends only. I really do not like all this hugging & kissing with all and sundry, can't understand especially when you have just met someone, much prefer the formality of a handshake.

I don`t like hugging

If you go in to shake hands people will convert the handshake into an awkward handshake-hug hybrid.

Don't go in for a shake and you'll get less hugs

Then again I was involved in the NHS so hugging was second nature to me
Ellanv
What has the NHS got to do with hugging?
Is it assumed that patients want to be hugged by the nursing and medical staff?
Surely treating patients with dignity and respect implies respecting boundaries.

I had a cataract operation under local. Someone asked me if I wanted them to hold my hand.
Noooooo! I’m a big girl, thank you.

I like hugs, family, friends, neighbours etc, nothing like a hug or a kiss.I know it’s thought of as bit Mediterranean but
British social stiffness could do with a bit of loosening up.

I don’t like all this hugging and kissing with all and sundry. I don’t even like it with family, except for children.

I love hugs

I am in a quandry. I am a hugger but I appreciate not all people want a hug.

We were at a funeral recently, a friend of OH's, and I hardly knew the deceased, never mind his relatives and friends. Every single person I spoke to (all strangers) including his widow, hugged me on saying goodbye.

I came away thinking what a warm and lovely gathering it had been. I wasn't at all offended and thought it nice to be included.

My hugs tend to be spontaneous. I tend to genuinely like everyone, unless they give me reason not to.

However, perhaps in future I will stand back and try to read a situation.

I don't think it's "Mediterranean" to hug. Most of the people I see when I'm on holiday greet each other with a formal handshake (even school children). The French do kiss on the cheek but I think that is mostly people they know well.

As I said.....British social stiffness could do with some loosening up!
Perhaps people see your look of absolute horror trisher as they approach you.

Nice post Day6 ??

So why is it so popular when, clearly, most of us don’t like it.
Is it an age thing?
I have never been hugged by anyone in the NHS but, apart from having my babies, I’ve not been an inpatient, upset about a procedure or a diagnosis.

I hope so lemon I like a hug to be a hug from someone I love and caare for and who loves me, I can't do with all this fakery and show. A bit of good British Reserve is helpful.

Sorry grumpa didn't mean it to be a double entendre.?

grumppa, I had the same reaction to sodapop's contribution.. Whatever next!

However, on reflection I think Sodapop meant being kissed on both cheeks rather than having a tongue stuffed down your throat.

I hugged a radiographer a few years ago when she'd done an abdominal scan then to tell me that all was well.
A delightful Egyptian doctor who talked me through every organ of my body as she was scanning.
The thrill of knowing that all was well and the doctors professionalism was worth giving her a hug and as a " bonus " she scanned the bladder too.
Wouldn't anyone have hugged her ? She was visibly pleased that she was being appreciated.

Gosh. I wouldn’t dream of hugging a doctor or nurse who wasn’t a close personal friend

I think I must have told people over the years, because most don't attempt it.
I usually move smartly to somewhere out of arms (or harms!) reach when I can feel a hug moment coming on.

Someone at our W.I. has terminal cancer. She has never been a hugger but I notice lots of people are giving her hugs as they feel sorry for her. I make a point of never hugging her or asking her how she is. Whether this is right or wrong I don’t know, but I have noticed our rather icy relationship from the past has definitely thawed and we even have laughs together.

I've been more open to the idea of hugging since my daughter died.
I'm not sure if its just because I allowed people to hug me, or the fact that I found comfort from them.
I still wouldn't like a hug for no reason though.

That's me janeainsworth. With so much bad news around and so many sick looking people waiting their turn I was obviously elated and privileged at the time for having such a quick appointment. I was so thankful as I always am toward those who care about your health and well-being. I see nothing wrong in showing my appreciation in this way.
I weigh up whether they appear approachable or not.

PamelaJ -I haven't done the sums so apologies if I'm wrong but, this thread doesn't seem dominated by folks who hate hugs, quite a number of us are (respectful/careful) huggers. It's become "so popular" b because so many people do like it

Hugs that are clearly hugs from the start are okay. I just hate the awkward hybrid collisions that are like is it a hug? Is it a handshake? Is it a cheek kiss? Neither of us know but we're both too polite to put a stop to this craziness until we have collided one way or another!

Grumppa I was just going to say that to MissA too ???
I like hugging friends and family but we had one man at work who used to hug everyone I think I did move back or side swerve, without realising it the first time, and he never did try after that first time.