Your advice taken

Not sad annie, sensible. If something seems too hard in the event look at it as information gained and try to find an alternative, it’s not failure if it’s an experiment. Best to repeat each individual step until it’s truly easy before moving on. Good luck. Be good to hear how it works out.

Got several big hats because of prickly heat.

No therapist here available on the NHS, can’t afford private.

Let’s laugh at this, my plan ?

Step 1. Do not wait for darkness to put milk bottles outside front door, do it early evening .

Step 2. Sit just inside front door, with door open ! as soon as it’s comfortable place chair just outside front door .

Step 3. Place garden pot containing Rock Rose closer to back door, my darling daughter bought it for me , water and feed it myself, do not allow the gardener to touch it, have to venture into garden to tend it.

these will be done within the week. ?

Yes sad I know !

It's fairly clear from your account of the phone call with the psychiatrist that he is not going to do you any good. You don't trust him and that would be a bad start. You obviously have an insight into your own situation and your plan for gradual exposure is far more likely to be effective than the tunnel vision of that psychiatrist who seems more likely to treat you as a 'case' than as a person. Is there a possibility of your seeing a well qualified counsellor or therapist? It might be worthwhile asking your GP if such help exists. Good luck with your plan.

Sitting just into the garden in the sun with a book and a dog? And a big hat. A big hat always helps I’m told!

Nfk, you are right, flooding is not for me, it does at times work but when it fails it causes more problems. In the drop in centre I supported several agoraphobics. In fairness to the NHS they cannot give the support for gradual exposure, it is time consuming.

Going into the garden has now become difficult, the big problem with this illness is it moves forward whilst the sufferer moves back, if this makes sense? It has to be fought and it hit me when I was in deep grief and didn’t have the energy to fight back, because of ‘the bridge’ and fear of meeting one of my sisters I retreated into the house, suddenly I was phobic. Now fear opening the front door!

So I have worked out my own gradual exposure plan, I need to boost my self confidence which has been squashed following my darling daughters sucide. I need a goal ?.

I think your problem is that you’re an articulate, intelligent woman. And you probably do know as well - if not better by the sound of it - how to get over it. I think he’s afraid of you!

Methinks ‘flooding’ is not for you. Can you go out into the front garden?

I had a run in with him last year, haven’t the energy for another . Little wonder the suicide rate is high.

Powys is a large county, we only have one mental health ward for the county. Think twenty beds. That’s 10 miles away, We have x x ward here in the small hospital, the local mental health team have a house here for the under 65’s

If in need of a hospital for physical health we have to go to one of two hospitals, one in Glamorganshire and one in Momouthshire. People in the north of the county have to go to Shropshire, so a mess really.

Well I tried ? I will work out my own recovery programme, I was involved with the drop in centre for people with mental health problems for years untill it closed in 2017.

The psychiatrist obviously believes in ‘flooding’ not gradual exposure treatment.

Imagine a phobia of spiders, flooding would mean putting you in direct contact with them , gradual exposure would start with photographs and working from there.

Anyway. Thank you for the kind words X

You are going to have to be strong and find a coping mechanism because it seems unlikely that they will change their routines to accommodate you.
Good luck.

He sounds a lazy, good for nothing toe-rag taking money for doing as little as possible. So many people can’t get out for one reason or another and need home visits. I just don’t believe it!

Stupid, stupid man! Are you sure he’s a psychiatrist? Are they sending a car and someone to help you leave the house? If not how the hell are you expected to get there? If they can be persuaded to send a SW or such to help you get out of the house, they’ll be able to see that you can’t!

I do think it’s time to contact your local Labour Party, councillors, Priest, Pastor, MP, Jeremy Hunt, newspaper, BBC (You and Yours) or anyone you can think of who may be able to kick up a bit of a stink. How many others are there like you who’re being pushed to one side and forgotten?

I spoke to the psychiatrist, he telephoned me. I explained fully, he said well leaving your house, crossing the bridge coming to X X ward in the hospital will be an excellent start to recovery .

There would be sod all else to recover from.

And I cannot believe in 2018 with the supposed understanding of mental health problems anyone would ask an agoraphobic ‘ what are you afraid of ‘

Baggs, I have no idea why they treat under 65’s in the town but over 65’s in the hospital ten miles away, they just do.

Thank you all again for you kindness x

Its good the psychiatrist has made an effort to accommodate you. try and follow the further advice here Annie and phone his secretary to discuss things in more detail. Hope you get a positive outcome.

Given your last sentence, it's understandable why you don't want to go there, Annie.

Please, do phone the psychiatrist's secretary and see if there is some way round this.

I'm puzzled why your age is relevant, annie. If you are not allowed something because of your age, isn't that ageism? Perhaps I have misunderstood.

I expect they think it will become known if they make a concession for one person in a small town and others won't want to do the 10 mile journey. They have made a compromise, I understand it is very very difficult for you but it is a chance when chances are few and far between. I do hope you can get to see the psychiatrist somehow, surely its not likely you will be faced with all the in patients, although I agree its very sad those who can are only trying to get well.

It is not your term annie and with the best will in the world some people are locked up sometimes to save them from themselves or others from them. I can hardly think this is the best place for you to be seen in view of your feelings of being in a situation you do not have control over. As a claustrophobic I would be hopeless in a room with locked doors. They must be able to sort something out that is better for you and if they can't they don't deserve to be classed as a mental health team as they obviously don think consider the needs of their patients. I do hope something better comes up soon x

I apologise to all for referring to the ward as the lock up ward. Never meant to hurt or cause distress. Best no more is said,

I am not prejudice. I know our hospital, I know the layout of the wards, I know many of the staff and I know many of the patients . The reason it is referred to as ‘the lock up ward’ is simply because the idiot who named it gave it a two word Welsh name, this is not a Welsh speaking town, . I appreciate they are going out of their way to accomodate me , i will be forever grateful that although he sees patients in the local mental health centre the same days as he visits the lock up ward which is this side of the river and less than half a mile from my home , it is a large house, never been converted since families lived in it , lots of rooms , I am not allowed an appointment there because of the grave sin of being over 65.

I am afraid of seeing old neighbours and two friends who don’t know their families, I am afraid of locked doors. That I will not be able to leave if I need to without someone pressing buttons for me to get out, or will tell me to just relax, take deep breaths and he will not be too long.

I am not yet ready to see the building where my daughter’s body lay and where the P.M was carried out, very silly I know but that’s how it is.

I second Jalima. It's only uninformed locals who call it the 'lock up ward'. It's a medical establishment which will have secure wards (for the patients security). The consultant will also have an office. Don't let ill informed prejudice get in the way. They are making concessions to accommodate you. Take up the offer. What are you afraid of?!

NO, he will see me in what is unkindly called locally ‘the lock up ward
Well, my first reaction was unprintable
My second is that there will be other rooms in that hospital; can his secretary book one for your appointment? I have found that medical secretaries are usually very helpful and accommodating, far better to speak to them than go via any other route in the hospital.

Obviously Anniebach I am not suggesting you ask Jeremy Corbyn for help.

Over many years you have campaigned for the Labour Party Annie. I am sure you have helped others a good deal.

Is it not now time for you to ask for help from an MP, Councillor or AM? You know you should be entitled to better treatment. Don't be too proud to ask for help.

Oh, I see. That's awkward. OldBattys idea sounds a possibility. I suppose they look at it as they've made a concession to you and it's up to you what happens next.

Is there any way we can help you make it possible to attend? Analysing exactly what's deterring you and trying to find a solution?

if he is willing to meet you this sounds like progress?

how about your response.... I am able to attend the appointment in a small side room which will be pre booked.

A very sad, disappointing, and bloody annoying situation Annie
I have nothing else to add to what's been said