What should I have done?

GabriellaG, it was top among a range of possibilities. I made it clear that for most people that would not have been a possibility due to lack of time. You don't cross things out of a list of possible actions just because most of us can't do them, otherwise there would be no mountain climbing, or marathons. Were you trying to read some sarcasm into my post? Because none was intented.

Were there any other adults in the area ?I would have been inclined to stop one of them, if no police or shops around where you could have at least got support, or even dialled 999.He was not abusing the child so I doubt he would be in a fighting mode.

We will never know the circumstances but my initial thought was that maybe he had taken the baby out so that the mum could get some sleep, and then been overcome with tiredness . Difficult to know what to do

I agree GabriellaG!

Last year whilst walking in our local park I noticed a woman who was bent over looking at the grass as if she was trying to find something, as I become level with where she was bending I noticed a man behind her partly standing in the bushes ....they were having sex.?

As for the man you saw Kitty he may well have been awake all night. When I look after our grandchildren when they are playing I have nodded off momentarily, mind you that is on the sofa at home not in the street.

I CAN'T accept that ReadyMeals seriously meant the remark about suggesting that the OP could have offered to go home with him and mind the baby whilst he went to bed.
I find that totally incredible.

Too late to worry, you just walked by as many others would probably have done. Some time ago I challenged a woman who was abusing her child and all I got was a load of abuse and a hit on the face!!!! Learned my lesson.

He could have been a having a diabetic attack . My friends husband took ill with his diabetes while in the city centre and he was completely ignored because they thought he was under the influence of drink or drugs. He ended up really ill in hospital. Saying that , nowadays you just cannot approach people or you could be at risk of allsorts . If no police around as in this instance I think I would have either made a phone call or gone in a shop and asked assistant to call police to investigate or just gone and sat at the side of the man with the baby and tried to find out the seriousness of it by watching and waiting.

I think the fact he kept "jetting awake" is a sign he was able to wake instantly if the baby needed him and was not in a drug sleep. His subconcious was waking him at intervals to check on the baby. It seems to me this was maybe a baby who was only settling to sleep while being walked in the buggy and this was the only time the man could catch 40 winks. To have taken the advice of some people here and "joggled the pram" and therefore woken the baby might have actually sealed the baby's fate as his father would have been even more short of sleep and may have made a mistake later. The ultimately helpful thing would maybe have been to ask him if he'd like you to go home with him and watch the baby while he goes to bed for a while - but then who has time for that level of involvement?

Sorry - I honestly feel it's none of your business. He could be a single father struggling to cope, maybe working shifts to make ends meet to care for the baby. Surely better that than those women who ignore their kids while they talk non-stop on their phones.

I think I'd have walked off a safe distance and called 101
Easy to say though when you're not in that situation.
Hopefully he either woke up after a quick snooze or somebody else took action.

I was looking after my youngest granddaughter the other day and while she was sleeping I inadvertently dozed off on the sofa. The moment she woke, I also woke.

Perhaps, as others have said, dad had been on night duty or whatever. The baby was asleep, so perhaps his doze in the sunshine was inevitable, Perhaps, if you see the same again, you might call over from a safe distance. But PLEASE do stop worrying about it. ?

I would almost certainly have acted the same as you. If a policeman had been about I might have mentioned it but I am afraid I wouldn't approach anyone now as I would be unable to defend myself should things go awry. Don't feel guilty.

I probably would have done just as you did. On hindsight, maybe I would have "accidentally" joggled the pram, and then been able to apologise to the man and make a judgement on his lack of sleep/sobriety.

I think the safety of the child would be paramount. I understand your concerns
Kittylester but maybe the adult was unwell not necessarily on drugs or drunk.
I agree its easy to be wise after the event though.

I have just asked my husband what you should have done, he is a retired policeman. Shouted from a safe distance, asking if all was ok, he wouldn’t of run off leaving the baby. Or called 101 and reported it.

I agree with MaggieMay.

If it was in a crowded area I would probably have asked him if all was well, but NOT if he looked as if he was under the influence of drink or drugs. I think you did right. There was no one around who could have helped and you may well have put yourself into a vulnerable position and made things worse if you had spoken to him.

This is a difficult one. I like to think I'd have approached him and said something but I know I would have acted exactly as you did kitty

I think I would have said in a loud voice 'You OK there'? and then you would have a bit more information even if it was only 'Be about your business' or words to that effect.

I am fairly sure he was under the influence of something which is why I felt I should have done something and why I didn't approach him.

A while ago there was a lot of talk of people taking some responsibility for what is going on around them. That seems right to me - but I didn't act on it.

You know, kitty, I wouldn’t worry about it. The likelihood is that he was just shattered from lack of sleep (who hasn’t given a young parent, or themselves, a nudge when they’ve settled on the sofa with a newborn and just can’t keep their eyes open?). I’m sure the baby would have woken him up when it needed him! If there was anything amiss, that’s when it would have become apparent.

It’s hard to know what we would do when actually faced with something, isn’t it? Kitty looked out for a security guard or police officer but couldn’t find one, but I understand her apprehension about approaching the young man in question alone. Who knows how he might have responded? Sadly, because of the horrible things we hear about when people step in to help, I well understand Kitty’s hesitance. I understand why she now feels guilty, but she shouldn’t.

I suspect I might have done this after sleepless nights with a baby!

Indeed I think its the sort of situation where you need it to be happening there in front of * your * eyes...........and then you might make that quick response,or,yes,Old Meg as you said...........would I?

I think on reflection it should have been attended too......but how many of us are simply only wise after the event?