My friend’s husband is full of self-importance

Why not make a list of his stories. Then when you are together preempt him by, picking one in your mind, and saying 'oh do tell me about.. and go for the topic of one of his stories..

I feel sorry for him

Likewise!

I have a horrible feeling that I sometimes repeat 'interesting' anecdotes from my past 'achievements', such as they were. I feel sure that this is because, once retired from employment and public life, there's a loss of status and I do it unconsciously, because there's nothing more recent that I find worth repeating.

I agree with squiffy this repetition of past glories sounds like someone bereaved and lacking self esteem.

Well if it annoys you that much I don’t know how you ve managed holidays with them
As you ve let it ‘wash ove4 you’ and the wife’s done the same he ll never know he’s being a boring old fart will he ?
Don’t know how you can all have so much fun if he’s full of his own importance and always bleating on without much care or compassion for others

Vicky it is very difficult for you, but if they have been good friends, and you like them, I guess you have to consider it his little foible?
If not, you have to find reasons to see less of them as time goes on.

Bridgeit yes,we say this too, it gives people the opportunity to say ‘oh yes,I remember you saying that’.
The fact is, nobody remembers much about what a friend or relative tells them over the years ( unless it’s really memorable....and DH does have a few of those!)

Go to www.gransnet.com/forums/grandads_shed Rufus . That is where the Grandads go when they want to hide from the grandmas.

They also post all over Gransnet too, when they feel like it.

At the beginning of a conversation I have started to say ‘I may have told you this already. ‘ Im not sure if this means I’m ok or that I know I’m not, so by using what I perceive to be a smart tactic am I fooling myself , hoping no one will notice that I am not ?

Rufus, there are other men on this site! You are not alone!

Yes, I was at a party not all that long ago and thought Hmm I’m even boring myself........

Get him to join Gransnet!
If he hasn't got a sense of that antidote called humour, he soon will have.

I could with some company! We'd have a ball!

Ta-Ra and Good Health

Indeed, Maw. Surely we’ve all got halfway through telling a fascinating tale and seen the other person’s eyes glaze over (or that he’s simply wandered off to make a cuppa)? No? Perhaps that’s just me then.

What makes you think you are immune to this, or indeed any of us, OP

There are one or two things which could be happening....he possibly has the start of dementia (only if he repeats other things too and has other symptoms), or he really misses his job and hasn't found anything else to fill the void. OR he's a boring bloke and someone needs to say "Yes, you've told us that lots of time" and "Oh, I remember the end to this story" Be blunt if he is actually boring.

My H is the same and has been since we were about.... twenty one?

The material is pretty stale by now but I have an excellent “listening” face and that along with a few “oh”s and “really”s seems to do the trick.

I learned early that it is crucial to avoid indicating you have heard the story before or even worse, incautiously blurting out the ending yourself

It's probably that he's got nothing else to talk about . I think I'd feel sorry for him.
Be a good friend and tolerate it without passing comment.

And suggests he volunteers to make use of his expertise!

It sounds as though he has nothing much in his life now to interest him, if he talks constantly about his glory days. Just be kind, and nod in the appropriate places.

Perhaps he keeps repeating work related stories because that's how he identifies himself. Now he's retired he's just himself without a 'job title' IYSWIM. He may feel a bit lost and so clings to what he used to be.

Snap Willow500.......obviously thinking alike.
Hence all the more important to think kindly, because indeed very often........"There but for the grace of god go I"........we cannot hear ourselves but I could guess we too may be guilty of something similar at some points in our lives.
A case of "Live and let live",though annoying at the time!

we have an old friend ,retired,who always says it'll be the last time we....buy a new washing m/c
change our car
decorate the kitchen etc etc etc
That would be fine if her was 80 or even 70 but he's in his mid fifties!!!Drives me nuts.I'm nearly 10 years older than him ,have less of a pension and it certainly wont be the last time I do ANTHING .

Is that kind?
We can all drone on a bit, repeating ourselves and retelling (boring) anecdotes.
But is it kind to make fun of him?

Perhaps you could all start making jokes about it - if he starts to tell a story you have heard before, complete it for him and laugh. It could be he is uncomfortable with long silences so talks to fill them.