Time Alone

DH is away a lot at present for one reason or another and I love being on my own. Any mess is my mess and I can do what I like, when I like and how I like without bothering with anyone else. Perhaps being an only child helps. I've always enjoyed my own company though I admit it takes me a day to get used to be on my own initially. My family is nearby should I need them and I go out to lunch with friends so I don't feel lonely - it's just that it's totally on my terms! Perhaps I'm being selfish - but I'm being 'me'

I am happy with my own company and am rarely bored when I am alone. But as others have said there is a difference between being alone and being lonely. I live with DH and have two of my children in the same city so am lucky in that respect. I do think we have to really make the effort to keep up social links as we get older since we probably don’t have the interaction through work or with other parents at school.

Today I am longing for a bit peace and quiet.
I'm in a grumpy on edge mood
Just silence and the chance to be still for a little while I know would help.
But it will unfortunately not be today.

I believe there is a difference between being alone and lonely.

Nankate enjoy your 'please yourself time'
You and your family will enjoy swapping stories about the weekend when you catch up.
The weather looks promising

I like the odd night or two on my own when my husband is away, much longer and it is a bit lonely, especially in the winter. I catch up on odd jobs, read and just generally potter around but he thing I really enjoy is being in charge of the TV remote. what is it about men and remotes?

I love getting the house to myself,I put my favourite music on turn the volume up high and dance my way round the housework.I cant do housework when my OH is in ,he always has stuff he wants/needs to discuss.We run a business together.I watch GC a lot too so its usually noisy and busy here .I love that too,wouldn't be without them but it is lovely to get the house to myself now and again

I'm with you on this Day6 and really need and love time to myself. I can spend many a happy hour or three reading, thinking and exploring ideas. I'm happy to spend time with friends, and do have a mother who requires a bit of input, (not living with me). OH and I spend much time together and I have GCs and quite a few outside interests but can't wait to have down time alone. I do not feel the need to fill my time with meaningful pastimes, after a working life in a demanding job.

Probably a dvd or an old film on tele. Had a clutter free day yesterday and feel really glad I did that xxx

I am glad Maw Brown made the distinction.

I LOVE being alone and I don't get lonely. Being lonely must be awful but I am not sure I'd ever get lonely.

I can amuse myself in many ways, books, TV, papers, pottering, thinking, being online. I confess that I waste many, many hours this way without contact, and that's the way I like it. I do know many people who hate being alone and find it very difficult and they crave company. Horses for courses. We are all different.

I am not sure if I am alone in this but people say I am gregarious, good company, lively, friendly, chatty and I am - but in truth I find being all those things such a strain, and will leave at the first polite opportunity. I do sociable in small and lovely doses (I do like people) and after a while need to scuttle back to being alone. I now share a house with OH but we both have our own TV rooms/studies. I wouldn't have been able to cohabit without space. I don't have to fill my time with meaningful pursuits/jobs either.

I do hope you enjoy your long weekend NanKate.

Strangely JeannieJoo someone was talking about a neighbour, new to the area who had 'settled in well' this week. She'd joined several (free) craft groups, church lunch club, something at local library, an evening class even though she was over 80. I've only just retired, I was impressed.

To 'Venus' - I know exactly where you're coming from. I lost my husband five years ago, and still find it unbearable.

I'm alone most of the time. Because I lived out of the UK for 40 years, I can't seem to find the kinds of friends that would be interested in my 'story' or me with theirs. I have no grandchildren to boast, my sister is in a care home, my daughter in USA. I read, do jigsaw puzzles, one afternoon a week volunteering at the charity shop upstairs all by myself. I've accepted it. I've enquired about companionship and got a positive response but still waiting for 'interview'

An only child is a lonely child so the saying goes but I've never been lonely on my own and quite happy to do my own thing. I have lived alone for 18 months while my husband worked abroad some years ago and quite enjoyed being able to please myself what I ate, watched on tv and did when not working.

My husband died, my parents were dead, I knew the children would be leaving home in the near future, frankly I was terrified of being alone. I never had been. Straight from home to marriage in those days.

Like Annie I have been alone for a long time and I have grown to like it. Quite a lot!

I think it is the freedom to come and go as I please that I value most, go off on the spur of the moment, stay over an extra couple of days, disappear to the other side of the earth for a month or more.......

I live and work with DH as we have a guest house. We do it all just the two of us, work hard 7 days a week so our free time is precious.
I do try to spend some time on my own, he hates shopping so I take myself into town. I go SlimmingWorld once a week and tomorrow I am starting a keep fit group called Silver Swans. It is ballet dancing for over 55/60s.
I am not sure if I will be more of a fairy elephant than a swan though.
Long to retire so we can spend quality time together but I have every sympathy Panache as we are struggling to sell the house.

Lonely? If only!
Don’t get me wrong, I know how lucky I am that my house is always full of children, grandchildren and hangers on. I love them all dearly and enjoy their company, altho’ I fear that their joke about ‘Nan’s 24hr cafe and nursery’ is all too true.
However, on the rare occasions when I do have a day or two to myself, I thoroughly enjoy the space and freedom. I go shopping sometimes, and have even been known to sit down.

I feel I the best of both worlds, living in a granny annexe at the side of my daughters house ... so company when I want, and solitude when I want ... so never lonely. Most of my married friends say that they wish they had more “me” time, so being divorced does have its perks !

Who exactly is confusing “lonely” and “alone”?
Most people have made the distinction.

I wouldn’t be lonely but I’ve never had the chance to try it. When my husband moved on (he lives not far away but far enough?), I was so looking forward to the freedom but it worked out otherwise and I am busier than ever co-parenting a small child and dreaming of having nothing to do but look after myself.

You are confusing lonely and alone. Nobody wants to be lonely but being alone can be good sometimes.

I would so all the things I love doing on my own.
All my various musical instruments would be out and I would play music all day.

As one Gransnetter said, solitude is different from loneliness.

Since the loss of my husband, I now know what loneliness is. Even being with family is not the same as being with your lifelong soul mate. Relish the time you have with your partner because it may not last forever.

My OH is going to France this evening for a week. I am going to stay with DD2 and 2 DGD's til Sunday then I will be home alone til next Wednesday.
I will spend my time reading, catching up with tv and watching GofT which I have recently discovered and OH isn't interested in.
I will eat what I like when I want it.
I'll probably go for a walk along the seafront if we have some sun.
I do get lonely but have learnt to live with it.

Read 'panache' agree with her and thinking of downsizing now while we're still fit enough to do it. A friend died a few days ago and she was on,y 67 .it make you realise that you have to do things now. I will be on my own sinday and have decided to sort my winter wardrobe out, sort some clothes for jumble and read a book if I'm lucky. I still work so time alone is precious. Love family time but also look forward to me time.

There is a difference between loneliness and solitude I think. Solitude is peaceful and calm but loneliness is empty and sad. At least that's how I see it.

Because I am an only child I rarely feel lonely and enjoy my own company, but do find the summer months tiresome, when all my activities close down, friends are totally preoccupied with grandchildren, and TV is rubbish.
This year I will spend more time in the garden.