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The things I regret......

(92 Posts)
Poppyred Sat 21-Apr-18 19:04:58

Being in too much of a rush to grow up....
Not savouring every moment of my children's childhood....
Not seeing Elvis live in concert......?❤️?❤️
Not being able to sing in tune ......

dogsmother Sun 22-Apr-18 10:44:48

Jaxie, I couldn’t agree with you more, I do get a huge buzz from my wonderful children.
The fact they are so clever ( and doing career things) but are all so grounded too. I could never regret a thing or I wouldn’t be at pe@ce now.

Jayelld Sun 22-Apr-18 10:51:14

No regrets just sadness that gaining and keeping my independence lost me the closeness of a sister resulting in years of separation from my family.
Thankfulness that I have regained a relationship with 2 sisters and 2 brothers. Sadly my remaining sister will not acknowledge our sisterhood.

Blessed because I have a beautiful daughter, son in law and 4 wonderful grandchildren, a wide circle of very good friends and my faith.

Regrets, no.
Sadness, yes.
Blessings, too many to mention.

Peardrop50 Sun 22-Apr-18 10:57:34

My biggest regret is not questioning my parents and grandparents more about life in their time, especially the family stuff.
Otherwise have lived a fairly privileged life with a kind, gentle, hardworking husband of 48 years. Four marvellous sons who fortunately take after their Dad. Great daughters in law and amazing, happy, healthy grandchildren.
Was going to add that I regret the two biscuits with my morning tea but put them back in the tin a moment ago so only regret the many before that.

driverann Sun 22-Apr-18 11:29:36

If I could turn back the clock I don’t think I would change much at all. Of course not everyone or everything has been rosy and bliss but no one told me it would be. As the song says ‘I didn’t promise you a rose garden’. We are what we are and where at where we are at. My late sister Lilly wrote poetry. This was s one of hers.
Reflections.

I am looking out of the window what do I see
I see reflection, a reflection of me
I’m looking out the window there’s nobody about I get so very lonely I feel like I could shout. I’m looking out of the window at least I’m not alone, there’s always that reflection so I am never on my own, I’m looking out of the window it’s very late you know so I think it must be bedtime so it is time for us to go when I wake up tomorrow I wonder what I’ll see Will my reflexion still be looking back at me?
[Lilian Buckland]

Hm999 Sun 22-Apr-18 11:30:32

Awful (now ex-) husband, fabulous kids. So no regrets.

goldengirl Sun 22-Apr-18 11:30:59

There's been lots of good and many bad things in my life but I don't regret anything. It sounds cocky but I've tried to learn from the experiences and move on - though it's taken time in some instances. I'm a bit of a pessimist generally but as I get older and because of health issue I'm trying to be more positive - not easy but I keep at it.

loopyloo Sun 22-Apr-18 12:11:48

Not going to see the Rolling Stones.
Overall, not being forceful enough in expressing my opinion.
Sending our children to private school, then struggling to keep them there.
Not being aware how important money was, in terms of security.
Thinking all men were good with money because my father was.
Not putting money on Maori Venture and the Brexit vote.
But it's all been most interesting .

caocao Sun 22-Apr-18 12:22:56

Sunbathing!

Marybel Sun 22-Apr-18 13:25:04

I regret thinking that there was endless time to do all the things I wanted to but didn't, mainly because my husband didn't want to. Now I am old and on my own, although I have the money to do all those things, health problems limit what I can do. I do count my blessings for my lovely family but feel I wasted so many years. To any younger members - you've only got one life so live it!

Nanny41 Sun 22-Apr-18 13:30:55

Due to the fact I dont live in the UK I couldnt be with my parents when they died, it always makes me sad.

Patticake123 Sun 22-Apr-18 13:37:50

Like Stella1949 I didn’t see the Beatles in 1963 because my Mum wouldn’t let me queue for a ticket but I did see the Rolling Stones. Also I went into nursing because my parents wanted me to and 23 years later I changed careers and really enjoyed the latter part of my working life. Regretting is so negative, so I don’t regret those years, I learnt a lot. And last year I did see Paul Mc Cartney live on stage in Brooklyn, it was worth the wait!

PoppyB Sun 22-Apr-18 13:48:38

My biggest regret is giving my son everything even my house to help him in his time of need. I showered my daughter in law with love, something I never had from my mother in law. I doted on my grandsons and saved for their futures. Now it’s all gone and I don’t know why. My son one day decided as he had had everything from me I was surplus to requirements. Letters, texts, phone calls, email to no avail. Nothing from them in three years, I’m heartbroken.

Grandma70s Sun 22-Apr-18 14:06:04

I regret not having moved south to London or the Home Counties when houses there were still affordable.

annodomini Sun 22-Apr-18 14:31:04

As I said the last time we had a thread about this: 'je ne regrette rien'.

mabon1 Sun 22-Apr-18 14:34:39

Not taking up a place at Bristol University to study law in 1959

Dogsjj Sun 22-Apr-18 14:40:42

Couldn't agree more. Also I regret being so selfish as a teenager. My mother was a widow and when she wanted to be friendly with my friends I resented it and probably showed it, ugh!

Happysexagenarian Sun 22-Apr-18 14:42:29

I regret ...
Not growing up with my siblings and my Dad. I hardly got to know him at all before he died when I was eleven, and I have always felt a bit of an outsider in my own family.

Not spending more time playing with my children when they were young. I allowed the daily routines of housework and caring to get in the way. When my AC recall their childhood now they only seem to remember what a strict parent I was. But they have grown into wonderful people who are great parents themselves so I must have got something right.

Not learning to swim - always been terrified of water any deeper than my knees.

Not learning to ride a bike. Always hated falling off so I gave up trying.

NannaM Sun 22-Apr-18 14:42:31

I didn't know what I wanted or needed, so I just lived in the moment. Then I had a tiny inkling of what I wanted or needed, but didn't know how to ask for it. So how can I regret my past, because I may have had a niggling feeling that there was something different "out there" but I had no idea how to find it.
I turn 70 next year and I'm still not good at figuring out what I want, and how to ask for it!!

Jaxie Sun 22-Apr-18 14:51:08

How therapeutic to read these posts. I know few women who would voice their regrets face to face - for fear of losing face. Now I'm 74 I think what the hell, I'll confess most regrets.

icanhandthemback Sun 22-Apr-18 15:15:34

Not realising that my daughter suffered from anxiety rather than thinking she was a spoiled brat.

Rosina Sun 22-Apr-18 15:45:56

Happysexagenerian the second paragraph of your post could have been written by or for me. That is absolutely how I feel.

Herbie9 Sun 22-Apr-18 15:50:04

Being too shy, unconfident and often vunerable in the way I was treated, particularely when I started my first job where I was so used. It's lovely to see my gd so happy and confident now as this is such a good start in life. However, I'm easily pleased and have had a good life on the whole. With the passing years have gained in confidence and contentment so no complaints.

deaneke Sun 22-Apr-18 15:52:30

I so feel like that Nanna M. I don't regret much but somehow feel I have missed a chance to explore "me"!

grandMattie Sun 22-Apr-18 16:09:08

Regret that I never knew my parents as friends - only as a child, then as carer;
Not being friends with my sisters - more like sworn enemies [their choice];
Being so in thrall to my parents that I did what they wanted, and not what my heart told me [to teach];

On the other hand, if I had done the latter, I woul dnever have met DH and had my 3 wonderful, precious DCs...

Esspee Sun 22-Apr-18 16:37:29

@Loopyloo. Last autumn we went to Catalonia for a sunshine week. Day 1 we saw on a poster that the Rolling Stones were in concert that night in Barcelona so popped in to ask if there were any tickets.
Later that day we were off with a coach load from all over the world. The main conversation starter was "have you seen them before?"
I took great delight in saying that the only time I had seen them before they weren't top of the bill.......until I realised quite how old that made me!
But back to the subject. I regret coming off the pill. Surely I am not the only person who regrets losing the life I could have had if I had never had children. Love mine but in retrospect they controlled my life.